Freeople Thread 333

To: Prentice; All

MENSA members beware...

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England? Yes/No

2. How many birthdays does the average man have?

3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?

4. How many outs are there in an inning?

5. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Yes/No

6. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?

7. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?

8. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half an hour. How many minutes would the pills last?

9. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?

10. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?

11. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10'' tall. What does he weigh?

12. How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen?

13. A plane crashes on the Canadian - US border. In which country you bury the survivors?

14. What is the least amount of coins it takes to make 55 cents if one of the coins is a quarter?

DON'T READ ANY FURTHER UNTIL YOU'VE ANSWERED ALL THE ABOVE

QUESTIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Densa Test, Your Evaluation

*Give yourself one point for each correct answer..... Good luck!

1: Is there a 4th of July in England? Yes, it comes after the 3rd of July!

2: How many birthdays does the average man have? 1 Just one!

3: Some months have 31 days; how many have 28? 12, all of them!

4: How many outs are there in an inning? 6, three per side!

5: Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? No - because he is dead!

6: Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer? 70, (30 divided by 1/2 equals 60!)

7: If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have? 2, you took them, remember?

8: A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How many minutes would the pills last? 60 --Start with the 1st pill, 30 minutes later take the 2nd, then 30 minutes for the 3rd.

9: A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left? 9 (If allbut 9 die, then 9 are left alive, eh?)

10: How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark? zero...it wasn't Moses.. it was Noah
11: A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10'' tall. What does he weigh? meat, a butcher weighs meat!

12: How many two cent stamps are there in a dozen? 12 There are 12 2-cent stamps in a dozen!

13: The survivors would probably rather wait until they die to be buried

14: Three coins. One is a quarter, the other is a quarter and also a nickel.

Add Your Score... How did you do?

Correct Answers Rating *DENSA.....Dense Rating :>)

>13-14 Genius

>10-12 Above Normal

>7-9 Normal

>4-6 Crack head

>1-3 Lug nut

1,221 posted on 09/17/2002 3:34:04 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

To: operation clinton cleanup

You cleaned it up a lot!

1,222 posted on 09/17/2002 3:34:29 PM PDT by lodwick

Mom said he tried throwing them in the trash once because he said that part of his life was over

I have heard lots of stories like that... It's must be hard to be labled a hero when you have seen so many friends get killed. I'm glad your Mom, you and your sister are preserving his place in history.

1,223 posted on 09/17/2002 3:37:40 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

Did you know that the road to H*ll is called Darwin Road?

It's true...it's true...

and on that note....I must go grill a steak for a lovely lady.....see yall later.

If you think I made that up....Just look up a map to H*ll, Michigan....

1,224 posted on 09/17/2002 3:46:18 PM PDT by Windshark

To: operation clinton cleanup

Mom said he didn't like talking about the war

But my older sister remembers dad saying stuff in French and then saying that was what the French girls would say

Appearently mom didn't like that and would always yell at him .. and my sister said he would just laugh ..

1,225 posted on 09/17/2002 4:01:41 PM PDT by Mo1

umm .. I could get a few darwin awards .. LOL

And with that .. I'm off to dinner myself and then finish the bathroom floor .. now that I know baby oil works ..

BBL

1,226 posted on 09/17/2002 4:03:09 PM PDT by Mo1

To: operation clinton cleanup

I love your Mensa/Densa quiz. Does anyone here belong to the Mensa club??? Answer - yes, all of us because we are all genius'. (even Prentice)

1,227 posted on 09/17/2002 4:04:33 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

Yep, in the strip of park that runs along the coast...You can drive to this beach, don't have to hike like you do for most of them...

Another shot of same beach..
........Westy.....

1,228 posted on 09/17/2002 4:06:47 PM PDT by westmex

It is on the coast of Washington State...
.......Westy....

1,229 posted on 09/17/2002 4:08:56 PM PDT by westmex

To: operation clinton cleanup

I love your tunnel joke.! And now that I'm back I see Prentice slithered away again!!

1,230 posted on 09/17/2002 4:11:02 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

Nice picture westy, looks like a mastadon got caught in the lava flow...

1,231 posted on 09/17/2002 4:16:39 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

To: Canadian Outrage

Osama bin Laden, severly injured in an American attack, is in a US Army medical facility, when he asks the attending doctor, "Doc, when will I die?"

"Unsure of the exact time of death," his Western doctor says. "But you will die on an American holiday."

"How do you know it will be on an American holiday?" asks the terrorist.

"That's easy," says the doctor, "Any day that you die will be an American holiday."

1,232 posted on 09/17/2002 4:17:47 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

To: operation clinton cleanup

your post #1232 - That's for sure. Funny how these guys like Osama are so quick to send others to die but when they might die they run like the big chickensh$ts that they are!

1,233 posted on 09/17/2002 4:22:04 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

To: Canadian Outrage

This is bad...

A guy goes to a psychiatrist. "Doc, I keep having these alternating recurring dreams.

First I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam; then I'm a teepee; then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor replies: "It's very simple. You're two tents." !!!

1,234 posted on 09/17/2002 4:28:45 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

To: operation clinton cleanup

ROFL!! Are you just getting started???

1,235 posted on 09/17/2002 4:35:55 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

To: operation clinton cleanup

Actually OCC this is true. There is a grocery store chain in Manitoba and perhaps a few eastern provinces called LOBLAWS. The father who started the store chain was Hugh Loblaw I think. But he named his only son and heir Bob. Now the standing joke is, I have to go to Bob Loblaws! Just say it a couple of times in a row and you'll get what I mean. LOL

1,236 posted on 09/17/2002 4:39:55 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

To: Canadian Outrage; christine; ValerieUSA

I'll push the envelope with this one.... (wouldnt it be nice to cut and paste things in your memory?)

A horse and a chicken are playing in a meadow. The horse falls into a mud hole and is sinking. He calls to the chicken to go and get the farmer to help pull him out to safety.

The chicken runs to the farmer but the farmer can't be found. So he drives the farmer's BMW 328i back to the mud hole and ties some rope around the bumper. He then throws the other end of the rope to his friend, the horse, and drives forward saving him from sinking.

A few days later, the chicken and the horse were playing in the meadow again. This time the chicken fell in the mud hole. The chicken yelled to the horse to go and get some help from the farmer.

The horse said, "I think I can stand over the hole." So he stretched over the width of the hole and said "grab my 'thingy' and pull yourself up."

And the chicken did and pulled himself to safety.

The moral of the story:

If you are hung like a horse, you don't need a BMW 328i to pick up chicks.

1,237 posted on 09/17/2002 4:40:35 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

To: operation clinton cleanup

1,238 posted on 09/17/2002 4:51:17 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

To: operation clinton cleanup

Did you say BOB LOBLAWS three times in a row??? Say it quite quickly. LOL

1,239 posted on 09/17/2002 4:53:25 PM PDT by Canadian Outrage

To: Canadian Outrage

Q: What's brown and sticky?
A: A stick.

1,240 posted on 09/17/2002 4:53:30 PM PDT by operation clinton cleanup

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