Freeoples Thread 322

To: lodwick; null and void

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the performance of the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under the Boyfriend 5.0 system. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4, NBA 3.2 and NHL 4.1. Conversation 8.0 also no longer runs and Housekeeping 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed Desperate
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Desperate,

First keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2.

Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to such background applications as Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please remember that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly WAV files.

DO NOT install Mother in Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. It could also potentially cause Husband 1.0 to default to the program Girlfriend 9.2 which runs in the background and has been know to introduce potentially serious viruses into the Operating System.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and can't learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to enhance his system performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Single Malt Scotch 4.5 combined with applications as that old stand buy... Lingerie 6.9 (which has been credited with improved performance of his hardware)

881 posted on 07/14/2002 8:21:11 AM PDT by sweetliberty

To: gratefulwharffratt

They shaved their eyebrows -- what wimps! At my high school we plucked!

Thin eyebrows are banned in competition, eh? I wonder what other personal size requirements are enforced in Judo competion, just to make sure no one has displeasure?

882 posted on 07/14/2002 8:41:41 AM PDT by ValerieUSA

To: sweetliberty

That's a nice picture libby -- thanks.

883 posted on 07/14/2002 8:45:31 AM PDT by ValerieUSA

To: null and void

Hi nully.... are you still grumbling, or have you moved on to growling and snarling now?

884 posted on 07/14/2002 8:49:10 AM PDT by ValerieUSA

To: sweetliberty

That's me .. A Real Women .. LOL

885 posted on 07/14/2002 9:03:11 AM PDT by Mo1

This is unreal. I'm not sure which is the most ridiculous, the sniffers or the bureaucrats that are worried about people getting high for free.

""The problem is not very serious yet, but we are worried as this method means addicts can get high for free," the official said."

Malaysian Druggies Sniff Cow Dung

886 posted on 07/14/2002 9:03:34 AM PDT by sweetliberty

To: sweetliberty

Oh Good Grief .. you should see how the local news is staking out Allen Iverson's house .. the even taped him talking to someone at 5 AM

887 posted on 07/14/2002 9:06:20 AM PDT by Mo1

Doesn't ring a bell. Who is Allen Iverson and why are they staking out his house? I've heard the name.

888 posted on 07/14/2002 9:08:27 AM PDT by sweetliberty

To: sweetliberty

He is a star player for the 76er's basketball team ...

He has a history of violence, last week he went looking for his wife at his cousin's place but the cousin manage to skip out and Iverson got into some kind of fight or something with the cousin's roomate .. a gun was involved also

Did I mention he cracked his wife's schull before .. but I think this was when she was just a girlfriend

889 posted on 07/14/2002 9:16:08 AM PDT by Mo1

Oh okay. I guess I did hear about that. I just didn't make the connection.

890 posted on 07/14/2002 9:17:17 AM PDT by sweetliberty

hmmm... I wonder if cracked skull girlfriend would have still married abusive Iverson if he didn't make millions of bucks?

891 posted on 07/14/2002 9:21:30 AM PDT by ValerieUSA

To: sweetliberty

Well he is suppose to be arrested on Tuesday ... they is waiting for his attorney to get back from vacation

892 posted on 07/14/2002 9:22:16 AM PDT by Mo1

To: operation clinton cleanup

Maybe with 13 yr old girls, there is such a thing as an age appropriate joke, but I'm not sure..... My boys only laugh at completely inappropriate stuff.

893 posted on 07/14/2002 9:23:41 AM PDT by ValerieUSA

Do you really need an answer to that

894 posted on 07/14/2002 9:23:41 AM PDT by Mo1

To: gratefulwharffratt

As controlled as their society is, it is a wonder people aren't going postal over there, all the time.

They are going postal all the time, but since the US Army of Occupation went door to door through the entire contry seizing all weapons, they mostly have to go postal with an aluminum baseball bat. While that breaks heads with a fine BOINK sound, it just doesn't have the panache to rate an article in the Inquirer.

So9

895 posted on 07/14/2002 9:32:19 AM PDT by Servant of the Nine

To: sweetliberty

This is one of several similar pictures I got in an e-mail.

What is this, A NAMBLA Meeting?

So9

896 posted on 07/14/2002 9:35:48 AM PDT by Servant of the Nine

Oh Good Grief .. you should see how the local news is staking out Allen Iverson's house .. the even taped him talking to someone at 5 AM

They're hoping for pictures of him kneeling behind his drug dealer's cow.

So9

897 posted on 07/14/2002 9:44:00 AM PDT by Servant of the Nine

To: Servant of the Nine

THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR

898 posted on 07/14/2002 9:55:46 AM PDT by Mo1

To: Servant of the Nine

Swerve, you are impossible!

899 posted on 07/14/2002 9:56:23 AM PDT by sweetliberty

To: Servant of the Nine

They're hoping for pictures of him kneeling behind his drug dealer's cow.

Did you here a bronco is involved .. I don't know how it relates .. but the news had to mention it ..

900 posted on 07/14/2002 9:57:41 AM PDT by Mo1

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