Freeoples ....
Thread 316
Posted on 06/09/2002 9:52:11 AM PDT by Mo1
Freeoples ....
Thread 316
I've got to head out for a bit....meet my treadmill for the evening session. TTYL...
Q. How can you tell when a man is well-hung?
A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A. Shoot him again.
Q. Why do little boys whine?
A. Because they're practicing to be men.
Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him OR Three - one to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.
Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
A. Trustworthy.
Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
Q. Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
A. Because not one will stop and ask directions.
Q. Why do female black widow spiders kill their mates after mating?
A. To stop the snoring before it starts.
Q: Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q: What is the difference between men and women.
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
Q: How does a man keep his youth?
A: By giving her money, furs and diamonds
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your email?
A: Rename the mail folder "instruction manuals".
John was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers, called pullets,
and eight roosters, whose job it was to fertilize the eggs. He kept records and any rooster
or pullet that didn't perform well went into the pot and was replaced.
This took an awful lot of time, so John got a set of tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Now he could sit and fill out an efficiency report by listening to the sound of the bells.
John's favorite rooster was old Brewster. A very fine specimen he was, but his bell had not
rung all morning. Curious, John went to investigate.
Several roosters were chasing pullets, bells a-ringing, but Brewster had his bell in his beak
so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up to a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud, he entered him in the county fair. Brewster was an overnight sensation. The judges not only awarded Brewster the No Bell Prize but also The Pullet Surprise.
*Smooch*
How are you doing sweetie? Have you heard any more from Ringy?
What's this 'we' crap, girl....are you pregnant?
As to your list of Q & A's, just which one isn't so....
According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about women is their eyes. Women say the first thing they notice about men is that they're a bunch of liars.
One with low self-esteem ? LOL
Wimpiness is so passe, so Clintonesque LOL .... Real men Rock.
Forget kissin' babies. Drive a pickup
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