Click here: to donate by Credit Card
Or here: to donate by PayPal
Or by mail to: Free Republic, LLC - PO Box 9771 - Fresno, CA 93794
Thank you very much and God bless you.
Posted on 10/18/2025 5:57:46 AM PDT by Twotone
I was sitting in a Starbucks the other day, typing away on the laptop open in front of me, pausing to look out the window and watch the cars roll by every few minutes, when a young guy walked over and just started talking to me.
Him: “Do you mind if I talk to you a bit? Would you like to have a conversation?”
Me: “Um, sure. Have a seat. Are you working on a project or something? Writing something?”
Him: “No. I’m just trying to talk to more people. I used to be really socially awkward, so a few years ago I decided that I should just talk to people when I have a few extra minutes.”
Channeling Albert
I thought it was a fantastic idea and said as much; then I asked if he came up with it on his own. He said that he had.
I told him that back in the 1930s the psychologist Albert Ellis did a similar thing for a similar reason. Basically Ellis — then a very shy young man in his 20s — would go to the park and talk to every single woman he saw. All ages, shapes, and sizes. He reported that it helped him immensely, essentially curing him of his crippling social anxiety.
I brought up Ellis not to undercut the creativity of his idea but to underscore the fact that he was on to something very real. Great minds think alike, you know.
I asked him if he thought it had helped him, and he, like Ellis, confirmed that it certainly had. Stop me if you've heard this
He told me he was Catholic and was waiting for a Jehovah’s Witness who was meeting him for a debate. I didn’t ask him how exactly they set this debate or how they crossed paths, but I can only imagine that they were discussing theology online and decided to continue their argument IRL.
It really sounds like a good start to a joke, doesn’t it? A Catholic and a Jehovah’s Witness walk into a Starbucks for a theological debate.
I talked with him for about 15 minutes. He told me he was 18 and that he was in middle school during COVID, to which I responded, with my palm holding my forehead, “My God, you are so young and I am so old.” We talked a lot about his experiences speaking with people. How some were more open and others less so, and how he thought other people in his generation would benefit from doing something similar.
I told him that I think the Zoomers’ emotions were calibrated differently from their elders' due to technology and the social isolation it has brought along with it. He agreed.
Communication breakdown
He also shared a theory about how we perceive one another in our technological age. He explained that in his opinion we tend to project the most extreme views onto those with whom we disagree before we even interact, with the result that we adjust our own views to be more extreme. Everyone is constantly doing this, which is why communication gets worse and worse.
I found this compelling. I had never thought of it that way, and while I need to ponder it more to know if I really agree or not, I think there must be some truth to it. I also think, due to his age, he has a more personal insight into his generation’s sense of the world than I. He is a native to his strange world, while I am only a documentarian noting the ways of these peculiar people we call Zoomers.
Listen up
I like talking to people. Truthfully, I like doing the listening more than the talking. It might be because I’m a writer and always looking for inspiration, or maybe it’s because I’m perpetually curious about everyone and everything. Whatever it is, I like sitting there, just listening, taking in what they have to share, trying to figure them out. If you ask people about themselves, they will just talk and talk, and you can learn about all these other corners in all these other lives.
Our world can feel very internal these days with the internet and all the text-based interaction we suffer through. It’s easy to feel alone and estranged from everyone else. In our day and age, sitting and talking with someone you’ll probably never see again is oddly refreshing. It just feels good.
I really enjoyed my time talking with Zoomer Albert Ellis. I was fairly uninspired when he sat down, and our discussion was invigorating in a way that only human interaction can be. I learned something about the Zoomers and their social struggles as seen through his eyes. And it was heartening to see this young guy trying to better himself in the real world. Perhaps the kids — or at least some of them — are all right.
After a few minutes, a big black truck pulled up and a slender guy in his 40s with graying hair hopped out. The Zoomer across from me concluded that this must be his debate partner and said goodbye. He met him outside on the patio, where they sat at a black table, across from one another, for quite some time. I went back to my work, writing. Every few minutes I glanced out the window to see the a spirited theological debate, politely raging, IRL.
|
|
Click here: to donate by Credit Card Or here: to donate by PayPal Or by mail to: Free Republic, LLC - PO Box 9771 - Fresno, CA 93794 Thank you very much and God bless you. |
I had a gentleman approach me while I was attending to a door and giving directions to attendees at my daughters volleyball game. He walked up and started talking with me, not in a weird way either, We talked for about 15 minutes, education, music, art, customer service etc. It was like talking with an old acquaintance. It was such a notable encounter that I chalked it up to a brush with something supernatural.
If you ever want someone to just tell you about themselves ad infiniutum just ask them. Havent met anyone that doesnt like talking about themselves, especially themselves.
As a young man I was borderline homeless, living on a boat I worked on in Oakland. In the winter, it got cold. The guy who owned it was tight for money, so at times I went hungry until I was paid. So I hung out at a local Sambo’s Restaurant, where the room had heat and coffee was 10 cents. Learned a lot about people at that counter.
“”It was such a notable encounter that I chalked it up to a brush with something supernatural.””
***
An encounter with someone you already have known. It’s just that you’re not supposed to know that you already know them. Sometimes it’s hard to miss. And sometimes... it’s that they know you, but there’s no ‘logical’ way for that to be the case. That’s how it works with spiritual life. You may not remember everything, but you do get a sense of that memory.
Yours sounds like a fascinating story.
The Great Thinkers from many professions used to meet regularly at the local pub......................
I would have expected him to ask if I know Jesus and try to convert me.
Nice tale, I miss interesting people,
You must have been close to Jack London Square if you were hanging out at the Sambo’s I’m recalling....
“I’d be willing to bet that is an artificial story.”
Yes, reminds me of my radical neighbor who said we needed to have a “conversation’ last Halloween at a party. The “conversation” was her talking for 20 minutes straight about how bad Trump is and never mentioning Harris because the election in her view was ONLY about one thing, “character”. Policy was irrelevant.
They think they are getting sneaky now.
Interesting Ellis approached single women (the least threatening).
I was sitting in a Starbucks the other day... says a lot right there.
“I was sitting in a Starbucks...”
Real conservatives don’t spend their hard-earned money at Starbucks.
I went to Starbucks once. And I’m a conservative. That was in the 20th century.
I knocked on every single door in this little low class community, with up to 3 visits if needed so that I could personally speak to every household when I moved here, and started the first annual community event to break these odd loners out of their isolated shells.
I have new socks on.
That’s a very sad response. We wonder why the world is becoming so cold, untrusting and divisive, now we have a hint. Why would your first response to someone wanting to talk to you be so dismissive? How depressing. It wouldn’t hurt to entertain his request. It wouldn’t take long to figure out his motives. If he just wanted to talk, you might learn something, if he was selling something or was just a jerk you could always end the conversation. Hopefully, politely.
I am reasonably good at reading body language and can take a good guess at someone’s motive in less than five seconds.
I can be very polite and friendly or mean and nasty—as called for in the specific situation.
When I was younger, Just sitting in a bus terminal, or waiting at a dock for the launch to take me back to the training ship, I have had people approaching me who were miserable and thinking of suicide. I think I did well. In fact I think one of them actually got Satan pissed at me for saving him.
You are needed in my neighborhood.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.