Posted on 12/16/2024 9:34:51 AM PST by Red Badger
On Tuesday night, Fall River (MA) police officers executed a warrant regarding narcotics. When they got to 127 Canal Street, the suspects attempted to flee and took to the roof. One managed to leap off the roof, over the officers, and into a nearby yard where he got away.
The other, well, let's watch:
VIDEOS AT LINK....................
Look at this guy:
Langlais was so wedged into the chimney that the police had to call in the fire department to get him out.
They took him to the hospital to make sure he hadn't caught the flue in the chimney or otherwise hurt himself, and when he was found to have nothing injured but his pride, they booked him on drug related charges and other unnamed prior warrants.
This story just goes to show why chimney sweeping should be left to small British children and fat old guys in red suits.
I figured this story was worthy of a holiday poem, so I wrote one for Mr. Langlais:
The lights were all flashing: red, white, and some blue,
When with a knock at the door, the police flew through,
"You've the right to remain silent," they solemnly read,
But they were too late because the crooks had both fled.
And there, in a twinkling, a sound on the roof:
Some prancing, some pawing, and a very loud "Oomph!"
As the cops climbed to the top and were turning around,
Down the chimney, the perp leapt with a bound.
He struggled and stammered to get to the floor,
But it was no use; he could descend no more.
Full of holiday mirth, the police hooted and hollered,
All thanks to the criminal Santa, they'd just collared.
They threw him in the back and started the cruiser,
And reminded the perp he was one pathetic loser.
I heard them exclaim as they drove out of sight,
"That's one fewer perp on the streets for tonight."
(PLEASE CLAP)
He thought he could just Poppin, so the arrest really hid him like a ton of bricks. Obviously it was nothing to sneeze at.
The police’s chimney sweep was lucky as lucky could be...............
Talk about timing, what with his having to flee the fire in Malibu.
My 4th great grandfather was a constable in Newport RI in the early 1800s. He was charged with retrieving a silk dress that had been stolen but the woman wouldn’t open the door. So he came down the chimney to arrest her and take back the dress.
Love discovering little family vignettes.
Just out of curiosity what can the fire dept do that the cops can’t do in this chimney situation?
Set a controlled burn. Once the flesh comes off, the bones should just tumble down into the fireplace.
WELL DONE
Another fugitive from the law gets smoked after hauling ash from the coppers...
Light a fire under his ass................
I prefer Medium Rare.....................😁
note to self: right-size chimney hiding place BEFORE entering when fleeing from police ...
“flue”? That is worthy of a LOL! Quite imaginative on the writer’s part. ;-)
Reminds me of something from the 1970s. In tearing down an old house they found a burglar well dried out in the chimney.
I remember a few other old instances also.
When asked why he tried the chimney, the police said it seemed to soot him.
Ohohoh, now that's gonna leave a mark.
Word is that he layered up, his defense saying that it was all a dirty smear campaign.
🙄..........................😁
I carbon magine even trying it.
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