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Historic: Kamala Harris Becomes First Black Woman To Destroy World Economy [satire]
Babylon Bee ^ | August 5, 2024

Posted on 08/05/2024 7:17:28 PM PDT by grundle

Experts predicted that today would go down as a historic day, as Kamala Harris became the first black woman to destroy the world economy.

The achievement was the first of its kind, with members of the media and prominent political leaders all hailing it as an impressive step forward in the pursuit of equality and the advancement of women of color.

"It's a day for the history books, folks," said President Joe Biden. "Not only is Kamala the first… the first… black… the first black… president of the… president, but she is now the first black woman to completely wipe out the global economy. Old white guys like me have been doing it for years, but now she's breaking all the barriers. The idea… the idea... that a colored broad from… Jamaica… India… wherever the place… it's big stuff, folks. I'm proud to have been serving as her vice president of Delaware for the last four years. And now, this November… harbinzifarginator."

Harris's presidential campaign released a statement from the vice president on the achievement: "It is a great honor to be honored," Harris said. "To be the first anything to do anything is something. And by doing something, something is done. The word ‘something' means ‘some' and ‘thing,' which is what I have now done. And that is something."

At publishing time, insiders said Harris, if elected, would likely look to continue leaving a path of destruction until she would go down in history books as the first and only woman of color to preside over the end of human civilization.


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; california; kamalaharris

1 posted on 08/05/2024 7:17:28 PM PDT by grundle
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To: grundle

Right on.


2 posted on 08/05/2024 7:22:06 PM PDT by Reno89519 (Biden's Given His Farewell Address, So When Is He Leaving?)
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To: grundle
"Harris's presidential campaign released a statement from the vice president on the achievement: "It is a great honor to be honored," Harris said. "To be the first anything to do anything is something. And by doing something, something is done. The word ‘something' means ‘some' and ‘thing,' which is what I have now done. And that is something.""

The essence of Kommie Kra$h.

3 posted on 08/05/2024 7:22:35 PM PDT by Paladin2
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To: grundle

Two issues with one stone. The ‘Bee shows us how it’s done.


4 posted on 08/05/2024 7:24:55 PM PDT by BradyLS (DO NOT FEED THE BEARS!)
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To: grundle

5 posted on 08/05/2024 7:47:01 PM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion, or satire, or both.)
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To: grundle
And now, this November… harbinzifarginator.

Careful, guys ... you keep up garbling like that and C'thulhu will rise from the deep.

6 posted on 08/05/2024 7:50:20 PM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: grundle

At the shop I worked at, we had the first black manager in it’s 170 yr history. Yes. He “made” history as being such. But the records don’t lie. He was also the first and only to have all projects behind schedule, held the lowest overall morale, highest turnover of employees, most wasteful (financially), promoted only incompetent people, harassed dependable workers...

The list can go on and on. He was in a DEI position and was guaranteed to retire as a manager. It produced a giant stain on this fortune 500 company and the shop was a sacrificial lamb in the world of large corporations.

Good luck with Kamala Harris. I predict, with a hardened heart, that she will be the next leader of this country. What happened in the UK and Venezuela shines the light on what must be.


7 posted on 08/05/2024 7:52:04 PM PDT by Deepeasttx ( Sensitivity/diversity training, along with DEI are all un-walled reeducation camps....for now.)
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To: Deepeasttx

Domestic post of the month


8 posted on 08/05/2024 8:00:42 PM PDT by cowboyusa (YESHUA IS KING AMERICA, AND HE WILL HAVE NO OTHER GODS BEFORE HIM!)
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To: grundle

Doesn’t look like the same person.

https://rumble.com/v59qmo3-the-late-great-rush-limbaugh-kamala-harris-was-willie-browns-mattress.html


9 posted on 08/05/2024 8:03:43 PM PDT by Maudeen (https://www.ThereIsHopeinJesus.com https://www.patburt.com/)
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To: Deepeasttx
At the shop I worked at, we had the first black manager in it’s 170 yr history. Yes. He “made” history as being such. But the records don’t lie. He was also the first and only to have all projects behind schedule, held the lowest overall morale, highest turnover of employees, most wasteful (financially), promoted only incompetent people, harassed dependable workers...

Boeing?

10 posted on 08/05/2024 8:07:10 PM PDT by MinorityRepublican
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To: Deepeasttx
At the shop I worked at, we had the first black manager in it’s 170 yr history. Yes. He “made” history as being such. But the records don’t lie. He was also the first and only to have all projects behind schedule, held the lowest overall morale, highest turnover of employees, most wasteful (financially), promoted only incompetent people, harassed dependable workers...

I believe every word you wrote but would like to contrast him with my ex boss, I am retired.

I am a pharmacist and all I write is related to pharmacists and pharmacist technicians. We are all professionals. Ben was a fellow pharmacist and friend, Ben was Black and grew up in Mississippi during the time when discrimination was real. I grew up in Texas and Louisiana and knew full well what Ben was subjected to. I am White. When the position of inpatient pharmacy supervisor became open Ben got the job. Ben did not get the job because of his color. Managing a hospital pharmacy is not easy. You have to take care of many diverse personalities and races. Ben got the job because everyone liked him and upper management wanted things to run smoothly. They made a wise choice. Ben was a great boss and fair. I advised him not to take the job. Thankfully he did.

In the past I was assitant chief of pharmacy but resigned that position and asked to go back on staff and did. I got fed up with all the petty differences between what was supposed to be professionals. It consumed much of my time and I did not like it. I went to night shift by choice and had two outstanding techs working for me. One was black and one was white. I actually made more money due to differential night pay and overtime. Management does not get overtime. I did that from 1990 until I retired. It was a wise choice and Ben was an outstanding boss.

11 posted on 08/05/2024 8:16:01 PM PDT by cpdiii (cane cutter, deckhand, oilfield roughneck, drilling fluid tech, geologist, pilot, pharmacist ,MAGA)
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To: grundle

This isn’t satire.


12 posted on 08/05/2024 8:23:44 PM PDT by ealgeone
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To: All

I thought Babylon Bee was supposed to be satire, not fantasy .... Pretending Kamala Harris is ‘Black”.... That’s just ridiculous.


13 posted on 08/05/2024 8:25:28 PM PDT by LegendHasIt
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To: grundle

I am darker than her after a day of yard work.


14 posted on 08/05/2024 8:35:34 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
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To: Organic Panic

You must be a dei hire then with special protection.


15 posted on 08/05/2024 8:39:06 PM PDT by Fuzz
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To: grundle

The Bee has her speaking style down cold.


16 posted on 08/05/2024 8:55:01 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus”)
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To: grundle

Good one!


17 posted on 08/05/2024 10:14:09 PM PDT by gattaca (Once a nation loses control of its borders, it is no longer a nation...Ronald Reagan)
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To: metmom
"It is a great honor to be honored"
18 posted on 08/06/2024 1:08:05 AM PDT by Theophilus (covfefe)
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To: MinorityRepublican

Class 1 railroad


19 posted on 08/06/2024 7:51:54 AM PDT by Deepeasttx ( Sensitivity/diversity training, along with DEI are all un-walled reeducation camps....for now.)
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To: cpdiii

Outstanding contrast. I’ve met and an/or worked for many minorities that were thoroughly competent. My point is this manager should not have held the job since he destroyed a prideful, historic workplace. And being black secured his position beings they needed more minorities in executive spots. He led (sic) for about 17 yrs and as such, had innumerable complaints and litigations lodged against him over those yrs. And every single time their battalion of lawyers came to his aid and lodged attacks against the accuser whilst covering for his arse. Yours truly being the target of several.

I just see the same with K. Harris except on steroids. Due to her demeaning, god-like personality. This pre-said manager had a good demeanor but could ruin an ant farm.

Oh and BTW, when he retired a radical black went on a rant, screaming how this man made ‘history’ retiring as the first in a long and storied railroad repair shop. Needless to say, hundreds were gleeful he finally left.


20 posted on 08/06/2024 8:11:24 AM PDT by Deepeasttx ( Sensitivity/diversity training, along with DEI are all un-walled reeducation camps....for now.)
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