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White House Asks Migrants To Hold Off On Raping And Murdering Any More Americans Until After Election
The Bee ^ | 21, 2024 | Staff

Posted on 06/22/2024 7:19:16 AM PDT by Navy Patriot

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the presidential race heating up for the summer campaign season, the White House asked migrants to hold off on raping and murdering any more Americans until after the election.

As more and more incidents of violent criminal acts perpetrated by migrants have drawn attention to the Biden administration's immigration policies, Karine Jean-Pierre politely asked migrants to wait until after the November election before carrying out any more horrific rapes and murders.

"We'd really appreciate it," said the gay and black White House Press Secretary who is black and gay. "While we understand that many of you are eager to continue raping and murdering American citizens, we do ask that you wait until after November 5 to do any more. We thank you for your patience."

Though public outrage continued to mount as more violent acts made news headlines across the country, Jean-Pierre emphasized the need for discretion while the election played out. "Everyone likes to make summer plans," she said. "But we hope our incoming migrants can understand the importance of postponing their raping and murdering plans until the election is over. Otherwise, they may end up actually facing consequences for their actions, and none of us want that to happen."

When asked whether migrants who commit violent crimes would face any repercussions if Biden is re-elected, Jean-Pierre pulled the fire alarm and evacuated the building.

At publishing time, White House officials informed incoming migrants that for every vote for Joe Biden they cast in November, they would be allowed to commit one free heinous act against an innocent American citizen.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Education; History
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
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Say it ain't so, Joe!
1 posted on 06/22/2024 7:19:16 AM PDT by Navy Patriot
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To: Navy Patriot
They’re ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS, not “migrants”!!!

C’mon, Bee, don’t use the b.s. terminology of the leftists.

2 posted on 06/22/2024 7:23:56 AM PDT by Sicon ("All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." - G. Orwell>)
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To: Sicon

Would be a great SNL skit


3 posted on 06/22/2024 7:29:03 AM PDT by cnsmom
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To: Sicon

Foreign invaders is a more accurate term.


4 posted on 06/22/2024 7:29:07 AM PDT by Telepathic Intruder
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To: cnsmom

Wishful thinking.


5 posted on 06/22/2024 7:34:28 AM PDT by vaskypilot
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To: Navy Patriot

She is black AND gay after all!


6 posted on 06/22/2024 7:41:55 AM PDT by FroggyTheGremlim (Plunk your magic twanger, Froggy!)
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To: FroggyTheGremlim
> She is black AND gay after all!

And she's also gay and black, don't forget.

I think gay still trumps black in the Rock/Paper/Scissors intersectionality game.

7 posted on 06/22/2024 7:54:11 AM PDT by dayglored (Strange Women Lying In Ponds Distributing Swords! Arthur Pendragon in 2024)
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To: Navy Patriot

There’s a lot of truth in this.


8 posted on 06/22/2024 8:05:51 AM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (When did WE decide to make America a UN 5-Star Asylum Paradise for Socialist losers?)
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To: Sicon

But the use of the leftist terminology is part of the parody.


9 posted on 06/22/2024 8:23:09 AM PDT by Burkean (. )
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To: Navy Patriot

It seems mean to ask them to curtail the activities they came here for.


10 posted on 06/22/2024 8:24:32 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Navy Patriot

“White House Asks Migrants To Hold Off On Raping And Murdering Any More Americans Until After Election”

One of the surprises from the Twitter Files was how viciously The Government reacted to sarcasm - particularly when directed at The Government, and come to think of it, it was Babylon Bee that was responsible for Twitter finally getting into Musk’s hands (and thus the release of the Twitter Files). Back around 2 years again, the Bee named Rachel Levine as their “Man of the Year”, and thus they were immediately kicked off of Twitter (we now know that Twitter was simply taking orders from The Government). Just happened to be that Musk was friends with the owner of the Bee, so Musk called him up to verify, and then made his move to buy Twitter.

The headline here is FAR BEYOND what the Bee did with Rachel Levine...so don’t be surprised if some very nasty stuff happens now (but I have no idea what, but nothing surprise me with that bunch).

One thing I also noticed here...I saw EXACTLY the same response to sarcasm by a Ukrainian Operative on this site. It seems they cannot help themselves.


11 posted on 06/22/2024 8:32:22 AM PDT by BobL
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To: Navy Patriot

He’s yet to talk about raping and murdering by the illegals aka green light.


12 posted on 06/22/2024 8:44:22 AM PDT by Vaduz
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To: Sicon

In reality:

THEY ARE ILLEGAL INVADERS


13 posted on 06/22/2024 9:32:51 AM PDT by ridesthemiles (not giving up on TRUMP---EVER)
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To: GOPJ; poconopundit; Jane Long; Diana in Wisconsin; Grampa Dave; Godzilla; Vaduz; null and void; ...

At publishing time, WH officials informed incoming illegals that for every Joe Biden vote they cast
in Nov, they would be allowed to commit one free heinous crimnal act against an innocent American.


14 posted on 06/22/2024 9:36:12 AM PDT by Liz (This then is how we should pray: Our Father who art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name . )
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To: cnsmom
Would be a great SNL skit

If SNL was funny anymore

15 posted on 06/22/2024 9:36:28 AM PDT by FatherofFive (we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor)
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To: Sicon

Right. They are not migrants. Migrants move within a country. IMmigrants move INto a country. EMmigrants move out of a country.


16 posted on 06/22/2024 9:44:54 AM PDT by I want the USA back (Voltaire: To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticize.)
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To: Navy Patriot

Trump needs to do an ad on this, STAT.


17 posted on 06/22/2024 9:52:01 AM PDT by jocon307
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To: ridesthemiles

Potentially, the entire world is an accumulation of foreign invaders. We have cuddled the world with our fortune, blood and lives ever since 1948 and the world wants part of the US that is left over.


18 posted on 06/22/2024 10:06:03 AM PDT by 353FMG
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To: Sicon

They are NOT IMMIGRANTS, they are unwelcome INVADERS!!! It is only Joe Biden who welcomes them.


19 posted on 06/22/2024 10:09:49 AM PDT by 353FMG
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To: Liz

That’s about right.


20 posted on 06/22/2024 10:10:37 AM PDT by Flaming Conservative ((Pray without ceasing))
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