I’m A Single Mother With A Ph.D., And ‘I Literally Worked Seven Days A Week’ To Make Ends Meet

Hufffington Post via Yahoo ^ | December 22, 2023 | Marie Holmes writing about Sherrie Bain and her son

[grundle]

"I’m a single mom. My relationship with my son’s biological dad ended when I was two months pregnant."

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

I was thinking about cases like yours when I wrote my post.

You are the exception. But if we reduced the number of women who are raising children alone to women who's husbands either walked out on them or died the numbers shrink by a large margin.

Once that happens the problem becomes manageable. The rule is that we should provide for the widowed (and if your husband walks out because you do not want to kill your baby you are widowed even if he is still breathing) and fatherless. That rule has gone by the way side because the problem has reached critical mass by the choice of the adults.

It is not judging to say that. It is just reality.

[Tahoe3002]

Actually, I think this is fairly common in women.
They frequently take little or NO accountability for their actions.

Yeah, many men aren’t much better. Marriage and long term relationship rates are falling in Western culture.
Ladies, get ready for cats and box wine. Thanks feminism

[LilFarmer]

I understand and agree mostly.

I know that people do not make that distinction when you are single with a child. They don’t take time to understand what happened, they just turned their nose up at me.

No one helped us out but I didn’t complain for the government to bail me out either. I just worked 2-3 jobs to make ends meet.

I met my husband at a singles church group that had quite a few single moms and dads. It was the first time I felt accepted at any of the dozens of churches I had been to before. And it wasn’t a “seeker-friendly” church, just one that believed in second chances 😊

[Night Hides Not]

Smart move, the level of sexual activity decreases after marriage. Which brings up a joke my BIL told me:

Why is the bride so happy on her wedding day?

She knows she's given her last BJ.

[zeugma]

Whaaaaa? She’s black with a kid and the father left? Naw. That is COMPLETELY unpredictable.

LOL. pretty much spot on.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

My church runs a parenting center. You are a parent and need help come in and we will try to help you. There are men and women trying to raise their kids on their own that need help. There are married couples that need help. There are elderly parents that need help. Many of them are in situations that are just because life decided to hit them with a bat. But the majority are there because they repeatedly make poor decisions.

I wish that just fifty percent of the ones who create their own problems would smarten up because we are stretched thin. And I don't just mean financially. Yeah we know you are lonely but picking up someone in a bar and bringing them home, letting them stay and then discovering that they smacked your kid after you left for work and they woke up hung over? Ay Caramba! We will listen but the desire to present those people with a clue book that reads "Do not bring your hookups to where your children sleep" is almost overwhelming.

[cgbg]

“what does having a PHD have to do with anything?”

A PHD can become a liability if it makes people think the world owes them something.

If they just had a high school degree they would know they had to work hard for every scrap they got.

That is one reason why the high school only grad is often a better employee—they are ready to earn respect instead of claiming it as a birth-right.

[LilFarmer]

I get frustrated with people who make the same poor life choices over and over. At the same time, I realize some of these people have never had good choices modeled for them. Not for generations. Your church may be the first place they see a positive role-model. That’s how far our society has fallen, sadly.

[CFW]

“Her bad decisions are Piled Higher and Deeper than most. PHD”

---

It’s amazing that so many people with a PhD think they such an “accomplishment” means they are exempt from the challenges in life that “lessor” beings have to deal with during their life. I know my hubby and I worked non-stop in our earning years. I worked a full-time job at a law firm, then often changed clothes before leaving work and joining my husband at his construction job to help out for a few hours. We both got home after dark after which we still had to cook dinner, etc.

Life is hard. Deal with it.

We built our own home (literally) in our spare time since we couldn’t afford to hire someone else to do it. It has been paid off for decades now and we still live in it.

[x]

This is all between her and her therapist.

I’m staying out of it.

[arthurus]

Her history and her judgment will, of course necessitate the rest of us to pay for her child care.