Posted on 01/17/2022 5:06:20 PM PST by nickcarraway
A woman has questioned whether she was wrong to uninvite her stepfather from her upcoming wedding – which he paid for – after her brothers said they would not attend if he was there.
SNIP
The bride-to-be, 25, said her mother is upset that she chose to uninvite her stepfather from her wedding after receiving an ultimatum from her older brothers.
She explained that the siblings went through a “rough time” at the time of their parent’s divorce and that her mother had since remarried. While the OP (original poster) has a “somewhat stable relationship” with her stepfather due to living with him for longer, her brothers resented him and “limited contact once they moved out [of the family home]”.
(Excerpt) Read more at news.yahoo.com ...
Step daddy needs to cancel the check.
The kids need to mature, and seek counseling.
Step daddy needs to go off shore fishing and enjoy a life he’s not allowed to have in this toxic environment.
My brother was married 20 some years and one holiday he got a present from his parents in-law and it was a nice USMC commemorative Bowie knife. My brother was never was a Marine... God bless em, he never told them either and the knife resides in its shadow box prominently displayed in the man cave.
BTW he was a Coastie for hitch.
I can see the stepfather cancelling the open bar.
Her brothers sound like bullies. It doesn’t say their ethnicity. Some believe the men call all the shots and women must take a back seat.
Don’t want to invite him? Pay for the wedding yourself.
“I told my mom that my niece is going to have lots of guilt over her stupid selfishness.”
With this kind of vision, she’s likely to have much worse problems (in general) than a bit of guilt.
Yet another reason not to marry a single mom. You not only get the thankless task of raising another man’s child/children but some of them may well resent you for marrying their mother. Pass.
Just my two cents but if she is old enough to marry, she should be adult enough not to be pressured by her brothers. Dang... want to be a big girl then be a big girl and tell her brothers that HER wedding will include her step Dad. If she doesn’t do this now, her brothers will bully her into not allowing the step dad to be included in holiday celebrations and being a granddad later.
“.. we will take the cake, though. I like cake..”
Hysterical! :)
She wasn’t a single mother, she was a divorved mother. Does the father evaporate from the child’s life if the parents get a divorce?
a) Is that a hypothetical or have you found it somewhere in the post?
b) Even if it is the case, primary responsibility for the adultery is the mother’s, not the stepfather’s. She’s the one who took vows. And if I’m a child assigning blame to my stepfather for breaking up my parents’ marriage, it’s borderline stealing for me to be taking his money for my education and wedding. Accepting his cash implies my acceptance of his relationship with my mother and of his stepping into a paternal role with me.
She can cancel the wedding until they figure this out. Besides, her fiance will still be her cousin later anyway.
Message from an OLDE MAN to the Groom: Grab your keys, get in your car and Get the Hell out of there!
No one needs that kind of “biden”.
“Does the father evaporate from the child’s life if the parents get a divorce?”
In most cases, but that is also driven by the woman.
Not interested in divorcee’s with kids either. Same issues.
“The question was posed on Reddit’s IATA (Am I The A**hole)”
Has anyone posting the question on Reddit ever not been the a-hole? Odds are, if you have to ask...
Stepdad needs to re-evaluate his relationship with wife and step kids. Leaving the wife and the whole family might be required if there is that kind of resistance. stepdad better make sure he is, or was, not a jerk also. If he is innocent....might be time to leave. Let the kids support the mom in her old age.
Life completely sucks....does it not?
The correct time to disinvite him was before you had him write checks.
If someone was to reimburse him for the money he has already spent, that might be OK. I guess mom and bio-dad could split the expenses and still uninvite step-dad (although mom might not go for that.)
I don’t have much experience with divorce etiquette. My parents have been married 59 years. My wife and I are at 32 years. No divorced siblings. Just the in-laws, and that happened when my wife was 2. She joined the military to get away from her mom, and we have seen her dad 3 times since I’ve known her.
“to uninvite her stepfather...” She probably doesn’t want the stepfather at the wedding and blames the boys for being intolerant.
That was from somewhat recent experience. My daughter’s original proposed budget had some outrageous amount for a videographer, and she forgot the cake.
I told her nobody is going to want to see a video of your wedding unless something happens that you don’t want them to see, and dad likes cake. We made the changes.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.