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New App 'LootDash' Lets You Send Someone To Loot San Francisco Stores For You
The Babylon Bee ^ | Oct. 7 2021 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 10/12/2021 12:15:39 PM PDT by xp38

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Of course the Bee.
1 posted on 10/12/2021 12:15:39 PM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

This will be true in short order.
The Bee is no longer satire, it’s prophesy.


2 posted on 10/12/2021 12:22:06 PM PDT by Little Ray (Civilization runs on a narrow margin. What sustains it is not magic, but hard work. )
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To: xp38

Can I send Nancy Pelosi?


3 posted on 10/12/2021 12:22:11 PM PDT by blueunicorn6 ("A crack shot and a good dancer”)
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To: Little Ray

They know that. They have a prophecy fulfilled segment in their podcast. It’s often a real stretch but funny and scary at the same time.


4 posted on 10/12/2021 12:26:15 PM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

I almost fell for it....almost!


5 posted on 10/12/2021 12:27:52 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: xp38

I sorta wish this was true.

It would be great fun to send some miscreants out to loot stuff from WOKE establishments...lol

i.e. A few tubs of ice cream from Ben and Jerry’s or a bunch of stuff from any pharmacy that refused to sell Ivermectin.

I’d opt for the LootPass


6 posted on 10/12/2021 12:30:41 PM PDT by Bobalu (The plan must be to distract from Afghanistan by doing something even more stupid )
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To: xp38

Next out, “Poopdash”!
Where you can request someone to poop on a certain location in SF


7 posted on 10/12/2021 12:30:53 PM PDT by z3n (“If the populace knew with what idiocy they were ruled, they would revolt.” -Charlemagne)
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To: xp38

OMG!


8 posted on 10/12/2021 12:35:19 PM PDT by rlmorel (Leftists are The Droplet of Sewage in a gallon of ultra-pure clean water.)
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To: Little Ray

You are right. I started reading this and the Bee didn’t even enter my mind. Sad sign of the times.


9 posted on 10/12/2021 12:35:58 PM PDT by deek69
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To: deek69

I have been predicting Crime Tourism in California cities.
You take a bus to LA or SF. The company drives the tourists around, they steal less than $950 per store, the company takes them and their loot back to the bus, and they go home.


10 posted on 10/12/2021 12:44:58 PM PDT by Little Ray (Civilization runs on a narrow margin. What sustains it is not magic, but hard work. )
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To: Little Ray

Some cities already have “The Purge” on a nightly basis.


11 posted on 10/12/2021 12:47:23 PM PDT by Magnum44 (...against all enemies, foreign and domestic...)
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To: Little Ray

What happens if you accidentally steal something over the limit? :)


12 posted on 10/12/2021 12:47:40 PM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38
What happens if you accidentally steal something over the limit? :)

You get a court appointed lawyer and a trial date 2 years out which is immediately cancelled and all charges dropped.

13 posted on 10/12/2021 12:50:08 PM PDT by 1Old Pro (Let's make crime illegal again!)
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To: Whenifhow; null and void; aragorn; EnigmaticAnomaly; kalee; Kale; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; ...

p


14 posted on 10/12/2021 12:50:54 PM PDT by bitt (<img src=' 'width=50%>)
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To: xp38

I prefer SmashNGrub....................


15 posted on 10/12/2021 12:55:09 PM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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To: xp38

Above $950, it isn’t a misdemeanor any more, the cops might actually show up.


16 posted on 10/12/2021 1:07:49 PM PDT by Little Ray (Civilization runs on a narrow margin. What sustains it is not magic, but hard work. )
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To: xp38

Yes but what happens when the Loot-Dasher decides to keep the items you paid them to loot?

Let’s Go Bee


17 posted on 10/12/2021 1:12:38 PM PDT by Zack Attack
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To: xp38
New App 'LootDash' Lets You Send Someone To Loot San Francisco Stores For You

Now that's funny. It's funny because it's so close to being true.

18 posted on 10/12/2021 1:19:27 PM PDT by DiogenesLamp ("of parents owing allegiance to no other sovereignty.")
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To: xp38

OMF I thought this was true! The Bee does it again! LOL


19 posted on 10/12/2021 1:29:49 PM PDT by proud American in Canada ("Fear is a reaction; Courage is a decision." Winston Churchill)
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To: bitt

there’s an app for that???


20 posted on 10/12/2021 1:38:00 PM PDT by thinden
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