57 Things I Need You to Stop Doing to the Women You Work With

Esquire ^ | October 16, 2017 | Kaitlin Menza

[NorthMountain]

Not so much as a glance. Am I that ugly and unappealing? I guess so.

Post pictures. Ping Laz. Problem solved.

[a fool in paradise]

>>And if she wants to f*** you, she will tell you.

And there’s the rub, idn’t it? The women can be crass and invasive. There are fat women, bitchy women, skanky women, and women who just plain aren’t your wife or girlfriend. But if you decline their advances “why???” or “what are you gay?”.

Inappropriate is inappropriate regardless of what set of genitalia you have.

[grey_whiskers]

A person who has a list of 57 things on any topic isn’t doing anything useful with his or her workday.

Unless they're in DevOps, Agile/Scrum Project Management, or software QA.

Then it's just a slow work day...

[a fool in paradise]

The woman who filed a “language” complaint with HR at a previous employer of mine was the same woman who loudly announced (as she laughed with a female co-worker), “these are stupid men jokes, YOU can’t see them!”.

She made complaints about what she said were sexist phrases about numerous employees (things they’d been saying about equipment long before she was on the scene, “you don’t have to babysit that machine” i.e. you don’t have to hover over it and watch it’s progress all day, not getting any other work done).

[metmom]

It would be stated this way........

Don’t make any comment to women about their appearance or behavior that you wouldn’t make to a male co-worker.

If you are concerned that a male co-worker would take it wrong if you commented about how you like his hair, women will see the same thing and know how it’s meant.

I could see how well the office politics would work if men started making the same comments to other men that they make to women, or touching men the same way they touch women.

[metmom]

You’re not alone.....

[Tax-chick]

A to-do list is different from this sort of thing.

[a fool in paradise]

>>Yet another example: A friend’s boss once noticed aloud her new hair color. “I like the blonde!” Then, instantly, he backpedaled: “I mean, I liked it before! I mean, wear your hair however you want. I mean, your hair is up to you.” He clearly understood that it was inappropriate to comment on a female coworker’s appearance, for better or for worse, and bumbled through the awkwardness. He’s not a creep. He just said a dumb thing.

It can be quite alright for your boss to comment on your appearance “for worse” if you come in wearing wrinkled clothing, torn or otherwise ill worn clothing. Especially if you meet with the public, but even for appearances. Not every place has “casual Friday” rules all week but some people like to drop into an office in shorts and flip flops.

[Tax-chick]

Thank you.

[MayflowerMadam]

Before PC worship, it used to be fun to go to work.

[Dr. Sivana]

And if she wants to f*** you, she will tell you.

A lady reporter should be able to express her thoughts without resorting to foul language.

[ThomasMore]

What the hell kinda men is this woman hanging around... or does she just have an axe to grind. Here’s a one liner item for women like her... STAY THE EF OUT OF MY OFFICE, MY WAY, AND DRESS LIKE A WOMAN... NOT A SLUT.

[a fool in paradise]

Don’t touch your female coworkers, ever.There might be exceptions—like she’s about to fall out of a window. If you could catch her while staying near her arms and not her breasts as you do so, that would be best.
Don’t rub her shoulders.
Don’t brush back her hair.
Don’t graze her butt.
Don’t grab her butt.
Don’t let your hand linger on the small of her back while taking a group photo.
Don’t hold her waist as you’re trying to move past her in a crowd (we know that trick).
Don’t fake a fall and land with a hand on her breasts.
Don’t put your arm around a woman in a meeting.
Don’t place your hand on her wrist to emphasize a point.

Keep your hands to yourself.

[TexasFreeper2009]

ironically, if a woman likes you or finds you attractive nearly all of those items are ok.

Any woman who would make such a list I would avoid like the plague she is.

[a fool in paradise]

>>I could see how well the office politics would work if men started making the same comments to other men that they make to women, or touching men the same way they touch women.

What makes you think they DON'T?

Barney Frank and and a young VP from Fannie Mae. Gee, was this pay for play, a sex toy to get Barney to run interference against Bush's calls for investigations into their finances?

[Jonty30]

If a woman has a list of 57 things to not do to offend her, I guarantee that you are already on that list. She is also telling you to leave her alone, unless she finds you attractive.

Do not engage her. I repeat, do not engage!

[a fool in paradise]

If someone is seeking a lawsuit or a payout it is best to steer clear of them in workplace or life in general.

[setha]

Pence’s conduct, one of a very high moral standard, is well warranted.

[Big Red Badger]

Crazy Uncle Joe.

[ThunderSleeps]

That seems like a good summary. Unless you know a co-worker is interested, a come on at work is just going to come off as awkward and uncomfortable. Even jokes, not serious passes, are likely to fall flat if you haven’t gotten to know someone to the point where you would both understand you were joking.