Posted on 04/26/2017 6:18:53 AM PDT by BJ1
Fast forward to my 38th birthday. I was still single, and the world of dating had changed significantly in the last eight years. Tinder and Bumble, the dominant dating apps, offered countless options for single men and women, but made the experience of dating entirely impersonal.
Dating amounted to small talk with a stranger, who you had briefly interfaced with online because you each thought the other attractive. The small talk was a prelude to hooking up, and there were no expectations even of a text the next day.
It was brutal. And after trying my hand at it, I was no closer to finding the love of my life or starting a family. If I needed statistics to back me up, I had them. In 2014, marriage was on the decline, as was the fertility rate in the United States.
I had one real option left -- and that was to attempt to get pregnant alone.
(Excerpt) Read more at cnn.com ...
Try church, sweetheart. Guys don’t typically go there to “hook up”, and tend to have at least a bit of integrity.
What kind of advice should she give? Marry early before the men find out they can get it for free later on? Make a lot of money so someone will marry you? Lie and say your family is leaving you millions?
This is standard Free Republic. Blame the woman - not the men who are selfish and irresponsible. LOL
>>>Here’s a choice: save virginity for your husband on your wedding night.Accept Christ as your Saviour and ask Him to show you His will for your life.<<<
The number of women who do not have sex before marriage is extremely small. In the era of easy sex, how many guys will date a woman nowadays under the premise of waiting until marriage? I don’t know the answer but I think the number is very small.
I’m not saying I don’t agree with jimbug, but from a practical standpoint, one woman going against the tide is hard. Is it really a solution to getting wifed up or is it just a solution to avoid heartache?
Naaa. The daycare warehouse will be the daddy. She can play mom a couple of hours a night and some on the weekends.
It’s all good.
Today’s women are extremely picky about what they want in a partner. They search for the perfect man, who does not exist, and they set their expectations to an outlandish level. Ladies, there is no perfect man, nor is there a perfect woman. Relationships take work and need compromise from both parties in order to succeed. Sometimes, relationships fail. If you are 40+ and have never been married, more times than not, it is your own doing. I know women who are extremely high maintenance, and men are just not always attracted to that. No one wants to be with a ball and chain or a needy/clingy indecisive partner.
Because she was such a colossal success as a human, she wants to pass along all that valuable experience to another person.
I read the whole article. She appears to be a very caring individual and, I believe, will be a wonderful parent to two blessed twin boys.
While I strongly disapprove of IVF, sperm donors, gay marriage, rental wombs, unprotected sex and most especially ABORTION for promiscuous teens - this woman’s desire to find love, marriage and children was quickly disappearing. She envisioned a very lonely future.
Many ‘normal’ lives begin with traditional marriage and children, then deteriorate over time - ending in divorce, remarriage, step parenting etc., and often the children lose having their biological fathers in their lives.
She seems to have avoided these common ‘marital failures’
and with a deep faith in God her sons will have a blessed childhood and future.
All the societal ills you describe may be true — but God has placed the man as the head of the household, and he is responsible. Adam tried to blame the woman, but he was still considered responsible (Romans 5:12 ... just as sin entered the world through one MAN . . . (caps mine)
So it may suck, but it is what it is. Women and society can be all those things (but I think in reality you left out a lot of what men have done wrong). Men are more at fault is my conclusion.
I was 37 when I got married. My wife was 24. First son was born when I was 40. Our third, a daughter, six months ago. Wife wants one more.
My only regret is that my parents aren't alive to enjoy being grandparents.
Poor child. Just because your career came first why inflict your selfishness on some one else?
>>>What kind of advice should she give? Marry early before the men find out they can get it for free later on? Make a lot of money so someone will marry you? Lie and say your family is leaving you millions?
This is standard Free Republic. Blame the woman - not the men who are selfish and irresponsible. LOL<<<
I think it’s reasonable, based on the article, that she chose to date men based on their looks/sexual attraction. Had this woman the chance to do it over again, I would imagine she would look for a different type of man. That is the advice I would have liked to see.
If I was a 35 year old single woman I probably would be pissed off. Mad as hell that the dating world had turned into this meat market of meaningless sex. And I would probably be pissed off that I was likely to remain single.
One of my strongest beliefs is that children need a Mom and a Dad. Personal experience starting as as a child informed me. These women could be “big sisters” or involved with other young family members, ie nieces, nephews...but NO...THEY ARE SELFISH.
Women used to have babies at 38 fairly often, but it would not be their first baby, and they’d be married.
It doesn't?
I blame the WOMEN!
Why? So many give away their bodies freely, even on first meeting.
Why should a man marry when he can have all the sex he wants and needs (and more) with zero commitment? And enjoy variety at no cost or obligation?
Women are reaping what they’ve sowed. They were sold a bill of goods with the concept of free/no obligation sex and they are now griping about the results.
And for a man, sex outside of marriage doesn’t have the restraints of sex in marriage: in marriage - if she’s not in the mood - forget it. You ain’t getting any.
In marriage, for the sex to be good and frequent, a man has to LOVE HIS WIFE in every way conceivable. And most men have no idea what that means. Thoughtfulness, consideration, self-sacrifice, affection, tenderness, and more than anything, a willingness to LISTEN whenever she wants to talk - without trying to FIX things. A wife spells LOVE from her husband with one word: LISTEN.
Love in marriage is very costly for a man.
Why should a man pay that price when all the sex he wants is out there for free?
Women - face it. IT’S YOUR OWN FAULT.
The reason men are not as enthused about marriage as they used to be, is that the cost has gone up, and the value has gone down. As a result, more men are going "No sale".
The cost has gone up: most divorces are initiated by women, and too often it's for no better reason than the wife feels unhappy in the marriage. What the man can then look forward to is to be stripped of a large chunk of his assets, have to pay child support for many years, and see his kids used as a weapon against him.
Meanwhile, single life for unmarried men in their 30's and early 40's has gotten better. If he has a decent income, and stays reasonably fit, he can have his pick of women who are becoming increasingly desperate to nail down a guy before the woman reaches her expiration date. The women he dates will generally be agreeable to keeping him sexually satisfied. Meanwhile, he hears from his married friends about how many are lucky to have sex once a month. Why marry, if marriage removes the woman's biggest incentive to try to keep him happy, and changes the dynamic to HIM having to try hard to keep HER happy, so she won't rape him in divorce court?
What is so amazing is that so many smart women are totally blind to the truth that I stated........
Women were designed to start having children in their teens, a time where they are at their maximum physical fitness, and have the most years ahead of them to raise the kids.
Yes, men must comply with the female “schedule”.
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