Posted on 10/17/2016 4:04:26 AM PDT by Morgana
When I imagined my wedding, I pictured a destination wedding that everyone and their plus-ones couldn't wait to get to — something European and chic, in a gothic church with al fresco photos on cobblestone streets. I also wanted a couple hundred guests. In Paris. Or Ireland. A place from where my fiancé and I could just jet off into the sunset afterwards and disappear on the continent for a few weeks.
For multiple reasons (like, reality), my fiancé and I ended up planning a state-side affair, but the sophistication remained. We're getting married on a Saturday in New York City, at — in my opinion — one of the city's most stunning churches, followed by a reception at one of the world's top restaurants. A jazz quartet will serenade our guests with classics. The food and champagne will be French. Our palette is white on white on white (or ivory). The words I've used with countless vendors from my jeweler to my florist are, "Crisp. Elegant. Modern."
One thing that definitely won't be at my wedding? Kids.
That's not to say I don't like kids. I have seven kids under the age of 15 in my extended family, and my fiancé has around 35 (!) kids on his side. And nearly half of our friends have one or more kids under the age of three. But neither of us loves being around children that much, and we knew as soon as we got engaged that those kids would definitely not be invited to our wedding.
(Excerpt) Read more at wlky.com ...
Just hearing about her wedding plans would make me run away like a scalded ape!
Don’t mind her objecting to kids in the wedding, but a woman who wants a wedding like that isn’t going to stay married very long. Not unless there is a time limit in the pre-nup with her sugar daddy.
Mine and Mr. b’s was on a shoestring. $500 (double that for today’s prices) from venue to gown to cake. The guest list was small and only those who meant the most to us.
An ex-friend’s gown would have made the down payment on a house, the cake would have made a mortgage payment and the 2 venues would have made a few more mortgage payments. Guests, aka business associates, were left standing in the parking lot for 2 hours before and 2 hours after waiting for the photographer or whatever. Toward the end, she realized she’d gone over board so I had to pick up the cake (!) and I and some guests in our wedding finery were stuck washing dishes and being admonished by the bride that she’d have to pay if we broke any. And we’d better hurry up be someone needed to get them back to the rental place. Tthat wasn’t the half of it. It is on the list of the most miserable times of my life.
Don’t know if why we haven’t spoken in years is because that wedding day or because of their open marriage. Sorry, open is not a marriage. Either way, it boiled down to more of this selfish MEEEEE! stuff.
Zero kids and most adults should be exposed to those disgusting displays. Our reception was short and sweet with no alcohol.
should = should not
Ouch, don’t expect me at any NY weddings.
Don’t know why either. Sorry.
I’m with her-—not too long ago kids never came to weddings.
.
I’m gonna bet she’s more concerned about the wedding than she will ever be concerned about the marriage itself.....Sounds like a narcissist to me.
“The most common observances I have of young parents..I’m am old old school one.. I have are as follows in general
Black dads in public are rare as hens teeth
Black moms kids are as ill behaved as they are
Latinos have lots of kids and dad rules and this kids at least at wal mart are ok
And Latinos have kids and kids and kids
Ditto orientals but dad doesn’t rule
Arabs or muzz dad really rules but the women are aggressive and loud none the less
Kids in public are quiet....very much so...as in meek
Dad is iron born in the family
Single white moms have little control and just threaten and indulge ad nauseum
White dads discipline some but mom keeps his parenting balls secured away unless really needed
Having lived in Jewish population concentrations years ago it struck me the less religious were super indulgent which was off putting droning on and on ..at least to me raised in the strict south.....
Now I look around and all education class millennialis do the same thing I noticed in Manhattan so long ago now
I blame women, lack of dads and media
That was ruined what would have been our best class of parents
And white trash rarely marries anymore but when they do it tends to be traditional family just loud
Most white trash babies where I live come from fat fatherless moms and the babies are half black”
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My Grandmother had a saying about dealing with really bad children....”Take them to the field and horsewhip them”.
What happened to women like that?
“My pastor made the point yesterday that weddings used to be celebrated as part of the regular mass on Sundays. It was considered a community celebration.”
I could see where that could be a problem as many women don’t feel the need to take their little darlings to the cry room. It never fails, right when the priest is talking, and softly at that some brat belts it out like an opera singer. Same kid every week too. Have been there while that same kid won’t shut up during the entire sermon. I can’t hear the Priest at all and miss everything he says. Just no consideration.
The cry room is there so the kid can belt it out like an opera singer but not disturb the rest of the church. Don’t even blame the kids, I blame the parents when it comes to our church.
Yea I can’t say as I blame this woman. It’s her day and she’s taking her vows I’m sure she does not want her spine snapping because an opera singer belt it out because the parents are not responsible.
Many children at my wedding too. It was wonderful, but I wanted them there. Me and my husband’s choice. This bride and fiance should have their wedding the way they want it.
I actually agree with this bride. Some weddings are easier to have kids, others are not. It’s her wedding and if that’s what she wants fine. I actually prefer weddings without tons of kids.
Not a chance.
Yea. It is “my” wedding, not “our” wedding.
Hmmm. A wedding at a “stunning” church, reception at a “top” restaurant, jazz ensemble.....
The wedding as performance piece, festooned with lavish costumery, backdrops, and props, rehearsed and acted out to elicit maximum audience applause.
Inviting children-—or God-—might risk spoiling the performance.
That does sound miserable!
I guess spending a lot on a wedding is up to the individual. For me personally it would have seemed too extravagant, as a young person starting out and wanting a solid future. Too many other things to spend the money on.
You are right.
He acted like he was 40, with three kids. (Kids who were invited to the wedding!) Ha Ha.
So good you had to say it three times?
I happened to be sitting with my daughter and her husband as they opened the cards. Most couples gave $150. This covered about the cost the whole thing per couple. That was nice.
Back in the day (30 years ago) it was great to get $50.
Younger people have a good idea of the costs, as it is a common point of discussion. The parents generation knew because we’ve been involved. The grandparents did not have a clue. (It was kind of cute to see how out of touch they were—but that they did better than what they thought they should give.)
Gifting at weddings is not the topic here. I don’t think anyone was invited, expecting a gift or a return on investment. They were invited to share in the joy.
Got wasted and twerked Grandma?
(Just kidding. Couldn't resist an opening like that.)
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