Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

I Like Fruity Wine with a Cap that Screws off. How about You?
May 21, 2016 | Lee Martell

Posted on 05/22/2016 12:09:43 AM PDT by lee martell

One year ago, I helped a friend of mine find a place to rentshare and move into. I knew she would fit right in. We have been coworkers in the past, just platonic friends. She thanked me by giving me a bottle of Chianti; red Italian wine. I thanked her of course, and put the bottle in my storage closet for when I got ready for it. I was ready today, having just finished writing a group of Quarterly Reports for my Manager of a Group Home. I was planning to reward myself for completing the job to everyone's satisfaction.

I rarely use real glasses, if it's just me, but for this moment, I washed out an old glass goblet with fluted sides, perfect for sipping wine. I take the bottle out of the storage closet, bring it to the sink, and I make a discovery. This is one of those bottles with a cork in it. Damn. I no longer have one of those spiral cork removers, it was loaned out, and never returned some time ago. So I was stuck. I had a feeling this might get messy, so I took off one of my nicer Polo Shirts, and changed into an old one that always fits no matter how long it stays in the dryer.

I got my favorite steak knife out, and pushed down cork. No movement. I needed to tap the knife handle with something. I used a heavy rubber spatula, raised the spatula high over my head, and swung down hard on the knife handle, now jammed into the cork. It worked! I got the cork to move. Only it went down the neck of the bottle, getting stuck halfway. I used a siphon to pour the dark red wine into an empty juice bottle that I had been planning to turn into a terrarium. Finally, all the wine was out. Now I had to pull my steak knife free from the cork.

I put the now mostly empty bottle into the sink, filled it with warm soapy water. Soon, the bottle has expanded just enough so that I could wrench it out. I give it one last strong tug, like Thor pulling his hammer out of that stone. The knife comes out, with cork still attached. I get sprayed with a little wine, the kitchen wall gets sprayed too.

Finally, I pour some Chianti into my fine glass goblet. I was...disappointed. I had forgotten just how bitter Chianti could be, even when red. I doubt if I finish the rest of that wine any time soon. I guess you could say, I have 'pedestrian tastes, or low class preferences. When I'm in the mood for wine, something that doesn't happen very often, I much prefer a sweet taste. I don't always come out and tell people that I one of my favorite after dinner sipping wines is Carlos Rossi Sangria, or Riunite Lambrusco. I admit, it's not very worldly or sophisticated. What can I say? I was brought up with Mogen-David Concord Passover Wine being the only alcohol in the house, except for during Christmas, when we needed to add a kick to the Egg Nog. I have also enjoyed German wines here and there, such as Zinfandel and Liebfraumilch. Sometimes you buy something different just to experiment and learn.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Food; Society
KEYWORDS: culture; lackofculture; wine
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 61-8081-100101-120 ... 141-157 next last
To: arthurus

-—Thunderbird, way back when. it was a good comforter for the wharf rats sleeping around the diesel pump at the end of the dock.
.
.
.
If I remember right, when I first saw it, I think it was under a buck a bottle, but it was known to be worse than paint remover.

I don’t recall ever trying it, but that can either mean I didn’t try it, or it wiped my memory clean.


81 posted on 05/22/2016 6:54:24 AM PDT by Bubba Gump Shrimp (A Liberal is someone who cannot accept that there is a Law of Unintended Consequences)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 61 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

Once my uncle stopped by after work and my mother smelled alcohol on him. She asked if he’d been drinking. He denied it. They went back and forth and finally she dropped the nuke and said she smelled that nasty Three Roses on him. He was horrified and cried out that he’d never touch Three Roses and that he’d been drinking good gin.


82 posted on 05/22/2016 6:54:42 AM PDT by stellaluna
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: rsobin

I used to actually like that one... and Cold Duck, I forgot about Cold Duck, heh

I’d like to say I drank more wine in the 70’s than any modern wine critic...

...they all had a screw on cap though, and if you got the ones in the wicker they made a fine candle holder afterwards that you could impress the ladies with!


83 posted on 05/22/2016 6:57:27 AM PDT by Bubba Gump Shrimp (A Liberal is someone who cannot accept that there is a Law of Unintended Consequences)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 64 | View Replies]

To: lee martell
Let me call you a winebulance.


84 posted on 05/22/2016 6:58:39 AM PDT by outofsalt ( I identify as a Cruz supporter)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

Here’s a suggestion for the next time you need something to serve as a corkscrew:

Screw an actual long screw into the cork, and then use pliers to pull out the screw with the cork now firmly attached.


85 posted on 05/22/2016 7:05:47 AM PDT by Bigg Red (Keep calm and Pray on.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: lee martell
Like Beethoven and Dickens, fine wine is an acquired taste.

Yes, most of us say we are fine with Top 40 pop and Stephen King novels. But life is short and one should always be broadening ones horizons. Discovery of the finer things in life is definitely worth the journey.

I assume that the author is a man, if so, he is obviously lacking in some of the manly skills. No serious woman will be impressed with a man who drinks fruity screw-top wine. There are many ways of cleanly opening a wine bottle without a corkscrew. A screw and a hammer. A common house/car key. Even a wire coat hanger.

But it's been a while since I had to resort to those methods. At both my home and in my luggage for when I travel, I have one of these double-hinged corkscrews that once mastered, will open even the most stubborn corks with ease. It also has a nice bottle opener on it for when I switch to beer.


86 posted on 05/22/2016 7:16:56 AM PDT by SamAdams76 (Delegates So Far: Trump (1,160); Cruz (566); Rubio (166); Kasich (159)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: DuncanWaring

“I tried that once.

The hangover lasted for three days.”

It depends on how much vodka you use.


87 posted on 05/22/2016 7:23:42 AM PDT by Fai Mao
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 63 | View Replies]

To: Fai Mao

Apparently I used too much.


88 posted on 05/22/2016 7:33:08 AM PDT by DuncanWaring (The Lord uses the good ones; the bad ones use the Lord.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 87 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

A nice Chianti? Goes best with a dinner of liver & fava beans.


89 posted on 05/22/2016 7:39:10 AM PDT by ctdonath2 ("Get the he11 out of my way!" - John Galt)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: left that other site
re: Screw cap wine.

Chow for paragraph eater.
A favorite Pinot Noir out of Oregon with a screw cap is Argyle. Priced around $25 It is the most expensive wine I will pay for. Very tasty.


90 posted on 05/22/2016 7:48:34 AM PDT by Mycroft Holmes (The fool is always greater than the proof.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 65 | View Replies]

To: lee martell
I no longer have one of those spiral cork removers, it was loaned out, and never returned some time ago.

Recognizing where you first went off the tracks is critical.
Always keep your cork puller. Deny having one if necessary.


Simply consider it to be a hand held weapon and it's no longer a cork puller. {;^)

91 posted on 05/22/2016 7:49:55 AM PDT by philman_36 (Pride breakfasted with plenty, dined with poverty and supped with infamy. Benjamiin Franklin)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: SamAdams76; lee martell

GMTA. Yours is much nicer than the one I posted in 91.


92 posted on 05/22/2016 7:52:35 AM PDT by philman_36 (Pride breakfasted with plenty, dined with poverty and supped with infamy. Benjamiin Franklin)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 86 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

Corks get torn up by the metal doohickey stuck in the cork.
Then, bits of cork fall down into the wine. So, one just
gives up and drinks wine, cork bits & all.


93 posted on 05/22/2016 8:04:46 AM PDT by Twinkie (John 3:16)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: octex

That was quite an adventure. 180 Proof!? One would think that high a concentrate of alcohol would dissolve the glass bottle!


94 posted on 05/22/2016 8:16:30 AM PDT by lee martell
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 35 | View Replies]

To: xp38

I wish I could have seen some of those Vaudeville acts when they first walked on the stage. I like those lyrics.


95 posted on 05/22/2016 8:19:30 AM PDT by lee martell
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 36 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave

Now you’re talking my game! The time for Sweet Wine Shaming is OVER!


96 posted on 05/22/2016 8:28:14 AM PDT by lee martell
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 74 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

How lame is the Swiss Army Knife you carry, if it doesn’t have a corkscrew?


97 posted on 05/22/2016 8:29:01 AM PDT by Cincinnatus.45-70 (What do DemocRats enjoy more than a truckload of dead babies? Unloading them with a pitchfork!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: lee martell

I only drink Chianti with cava beans......


98 posted on 05/22/2016 8:29:29 AM PDT by Organic Panic
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: lee martell
Billy Dee Williams photo: colt 45 Colt45-billydee.jpg
99 posted on 05/22/2016 8:41:06 AM PDT by tumblindice (America's founding fathers: all armed conservatives.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: lee martell
My favorite is the Ah So.


100 posted on 05/22/2016 8:42:05 AM PDT by RightGeek (FUBO and the donkey you rode in on)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first previous 1-20 ... 61-8081-100101-120 ... 141-157 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson