Posted on 08/22/2015 7:43:13 PM PDT by PROCON
I am sorry. To all you moms out there who can’t go out to eat because your kid screams and ruins your dinner, I am so sorry. Until now, I’ve been incredibly spoiled and I may have even thought it was your fault that your kid was screaming during dinner. (I may have judged you a little.) My first two children–girls–were what we called white-tablecloth babies. We could take them to the best upscale restaurant on the Magnificent Mile and they wouldn’t make a peep. They would eat their dinner and play with a toy and everyone would smile at them and compliment me. I thought I was soooooo good at this mothering thing. What a fool I was.
My darling son just turned one. This is the one who already got me yelled at on a plane (another first). He has one volume: LOUD. He screams if his food isn’t in front of him quickly enough, when he runs out of zucchini and hot dogs, when he’s thirsty, tired, angry, happy, sticky, uncomfortable, bored, or just having fun. He has one mode of communication: screaming. This is not a discipline issue. He can’t be “disciplined” yet. He’s a baby. (The first person to say “spank him” in the comments section loses. You don’t spank a baby.) You can’t even really speak harshly to a baby. It makes the screaming worse! The only thing you can do is hurry up and leave the restaurant, change his scenery, play peek-a-boo, give him your keys, your necklace, the ten different toys in the baby bag, your wallet, your dignity and pray it stops. My God, it’s horrible!
Don’t get me wrong. I adore this kid, but I’ve never heard so much screaming this side of Hell. I’m sure it will lessen when he can talk and communicate with us, but as it is, we are drowning in shrieking over here. I hesitate to say, “I can’t wait for this stage to be over” because the next one that comes is the whining stage and that one’s no picnic either. What the heck happened to my quiet baby who nursed half the day and slept the rest of the time? Why do I feel like I’ve never done this before and most importantly, will I ever eat out with my family again?
Not only does he scream, but he misses his mouth most of the time (see “Why My Kitchen Floor is Always Disgusting“) and the whole floor around him is peppered with bits of half-chewed food. It’s so embarrassing. Mr. Fox and I had an emergency meeting about the dining-out behavior tonight. We are about to go out of town for two days and we’ve decided we should bring food and just eat in our room. It’s that bad. And I’m a veteran mother! This is number three! If I am not doing well, how much worse is it for you first timers? I’m so sorry! I feel you, sister!
So here’s my best advice if you’re facing a similar problem:
1.It’s not your fault.
2.Vodka is your friend.
3.If you must go out to eat, go to the next town to the loudest place you can find (where no one knows you) and leave a big tip.
4.Leave him with a babysitter until he’s 10.
Above all, the days are long, but the years are short, so it will end sooner than you think it will. Until then, you’ll find me slinking out of public places with a shrieking baby, trying not to be recognized.
This is an infant she should use the ouchless duct tape.
Well; mine weren’t perfect but they knew that ONE HARD FAST RULE; Make a scene while we are out and you will pay immediately, in pain.
Course now days that would probably just get me arrested for child abuse.
My daughter never screamed or acted up at restaurants. Eating out was a treat and she treated it as such because we did. Even eating at home was peaceful. Other times....different story
Some people just don’t know when a child needs comforting. Some people are too lazy and self-absorbed to comfort a crying child. Some people are so inconsiderate of others they feel it’s their right to inflict their screaming children upon others.
We chose to remove and comfort our children when they needed it. It’s not rocket surgery. It’s called being a responsible adult.
?
Because you were a responsible parent and were considerate of others.
Oh yeah, been there.
If the parents can’t make their kids behave in a restaurant it is clear that they do not make them behave at home.
I feel sorry for the kids. Shame on the parents for not doing their job, which is to prepare them for life (not to be their “friends”).
I frequently stop and compliment parents with kids who behave well in a restaurant. Good for them!
Don't be too sure of that."
I'll start off by saying that I'm a single guy who has never (as far as I know!) fathered any children, lest anyone take me for a parent of unruly children trying to justify how I handle my little bundle of noise.
I've had the questionable pleasure of minding some exceptionally strong-willed children belonging to various family members...An iron will just runs in some families, and comes out even before the kids is old enough to channel it into something useful. I can personally attest that in some cases it is not the parents' fault.
If I happen to be in a public place and somebody has a screaming child, I just ignore it...babies scream. I can't imagine what kind of self-righteous rube would actually confront parents or attempt to tell them what to do with the kid...Seriously, MYOB. Yeah yeah, if a baby is loud in your royal presence is becomes your business, or so many people seem to think. If it bugs you that much go to a different restaurant or go home and feel sorry for yourself.
Sometimes you have to get their attention.
People used to know these things.
WTF, you live in another sick fantasy world than I do.
Punishment, yes, but never your sick fantasy.
If I have kids, I can’t imagine that I would bring them to a nice restaurant no matter how well-behaved they might be. But if someone else does, I’m not going to give them a hard time over it. Whatever compelled them to bring junior to the five-star trough is really none of my business. Life is too short to get your knickers in a wad over things you won’t remember 3 days later anyway.
A nice restaurant will seat the family with little ones by the door to the kitchen. If they allow disruptions to the ambiance, they will lose business.
Some of our children were fine in public, others were terrors. We never inflicted our terrors upon others. It’s common courtesy.
Yeah. The minute our kids started acting up I would take them outside.
A couple of times I went out with a screamer and came back a few minutes later with him all calm or smiling, and people would ask “what did you do to him”?
I have done exactly that. Only had to do it once. “Settle down or we will go out to the car and wait for everyone else to finish. “ My child did not, so we left. Sat in the car with no toys no radio, no food. “Will mom bring my dinner home?” - “No. You don’t get dinner tonight. Neither do I, I’m sitting out here with you. “
I agreed with you. I love it so much I kept having more kids. I have 4 from 4 to 24. And it does go by so fast.
The original poster or writer only had screaming in a restaurant. For the past 3 years I’ve had puking in a restaurant,... Mine has the easiest gag reflex in the world. Also fun.
I think you were horribly rude. Perhaps they could have chosen not to continue their meal, but perhaps they weren’t from near there and needed food. Perhaps their child had autism and there was nothing they could do. I know badly behaved children are horrible and I remove mine when they are loud, but when a child with autism or other special needs starts to lose it, sometimes you are in a bad situation and people in public will be affected. My heart goes out to every parent in such a situation. Children and parents do not need to be whipped, nor does violence bring about better behavior in kids with disabilities. Give parents a small break. It can be very hard especially when the child has neurological damage, as one in 50 have now.
Done exactly that. Stop the car and nothing happens until they behave. It works!
My 1 yr old grandson is one of the Babies Who Lunch. He feels the vibe of a fine restaurant and does his charming baby thing, enchanting one and all. He will find that being a terrible two is not OK when we go out.
And, yes, he loves his Mimi.
Ditto!
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