What Do Deodorant And Voting Have In Common?
That silly audience thought he was singing to them...
Think Obama Is Incompetent?
There's An App For That...
Posted on 01/27/2012 4:52:38 AM PST by Lucky9teen
That silly audience thought he was singing to them...
IBTTT!
Good Morning!
Top 5
Just wanted to let you know - today I received my 2012
Stimulus Package.
It contained two tomato seeds, a cornbread mix, a prayer rug, a machine to blow smoke up my tush, ... 10 coupons to KFC and an “Obama Hope” bumper sticker.
The directions were in Spanish.
Hope you get yours soon.
Little Johnny said, 'Because I'm not an Obama fan.'
The teacher asked, 'Why aren't you an Obama fan?'
Johnny said, 'Because I'm a Republican.'
The teacher asked him why he's a Republican.
Little Johnny answered, 'Well, my Mom's a Republican and my Dad's a Republican, so I'm a Republican.'
Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, 'If your mom was a moron and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'
With a big smile, Little Johnny replied, 'That would make me an Obama fan.
Bada-Bing!
Top 10? Unusual!!
National Looter Dude
In
made the First Page.....another thing off my bucket list
Woohoo!! Friday!
One of "Holder's" people has been spotted.
Early morning bumpity bump
CATHOLICS ONLY HUMOR
For Catholics only. It must not be divulged to non-Catholics. The less they know about our rituals and top secret code words, the better off they are.
AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.
BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.
CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync.
HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.
HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation’s range.
RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.
INCENSE: Holy Smoke!
JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to found colleges with good basketball teams.
JONAH: The original ‘Jaws’ story.
JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.
KYRIE ELEISON: The only Greek words that most Catholics can recognize besides gyros and baklava. (for you non-Catholics it means Lord have mercy)
MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.
MANGER: Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn’t covered by an HMO. (Bible’s way of showing us that holiday travel has always been rough.)
PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches.
PROCESSION: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late parishioners looking for seats.
RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.
RELICS: People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.
TEN COMMANDMENTS: The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman.
USHERS: The only people in the parish who don’t know the seating capacity of a pew.
wooooooo hoooooooo top 1000!!!
Far out.....Multi-tasking booty bump.
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