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Posted on 08/01/2011 2:29:55 AM PDT by JustAmy
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This maybe has been posted. A friend just sent this to me...
This is a wonderful idea. Let’s be a piece of reclaiming OUR America.
WRITE IT ON THE BACK OF YOUR ENVELOPES...WE THINK THIS IS A GREAT IDEA.. WE’LL START WRITING IT ON THE FRONT OF OUR ENVELOPES, TOO! All correspondence!!!!!!!!!
You may have heard in the news that a couple of Post Offices in Texas have been forced to take down small posters that say...
‘IN GOD WE TRUST’ The law, they say, is being violated.
Anyway, we heard proposed on a radio station show, that we should all write ‘ ‘IN GOD WE TRUST’ on the back of all our mail. After all, that’s our National Motto, and it’s on all the money we use to buy those stamps. We think it’s a wonderful idea.
We must take back our nation from all the people who think that anything that offends them should be removed.
If you like this idea, please pass it on and DO IT. The idea of writing or stamping! ‘IN GOD WE TRUST’ on our envelopes sounds good to us. WE’RE HAVING A STAMP MADE TOO! Heck,lets use it as our signature on e-mails too!
It’s been reported that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, we have a very hard time understanding why there’s such a mess about having ‘IN GOD WE TRUST’ on our money and having God in the pledge of Allegiance .
Could it be that WE just need to take action and tell the 14% to ‘sit down and shut up’?
If you agree, pass this on, if not, delete!!! BUT REMEMBER IF YOU DELETE THIS, that’s 1 reason why this country is in the mess we’re in now. WE SIT BACK & LET IT HAPPEN!!
‘IN GOD WE TRUST’
or don’t we???
Random Fact:
Hawaii is the most isolated population center on the face of the earth. Hawaii is 2,390 miles from California; 3,850 miles from Japan; 4,900 miles from China; and 5,280 miles from the Philippines.
Bonus Fact:
Honolulu’s zenith star, (the star that rises directly above it) is Arcturus. The Hawaiians called it Hokule’a. (Hoe koo lay uh.)
“Critics are calling ‘Jersey Shore’ the most offensive thing the United States has done to Italy since the opening of Olive Garden.” -Jay Leno
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“A new study found that eating healthy adds $380 to your grocery bill every year. Or as Americans put it, ‘Cool, I saved $380 this year!’” -Jimmy Fallon
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“The stock market had its biggest one-day drop since 2008. Remember how the experts said we had to raise the debt ceiling or the market would crash? That’s why I don’t listen to experts. All my money is tied up in Skee ball tickets.” -Jimmy Kimmel
***
In a grocery store a cashier held up a small dairy carton and yelled to a co-worker, “How much is half-and-half?”
Without a moment’s hesitation the other cashier replied, “One.”
on honor of Memorial Day, the teacher I worked with read the Constitution to her third-grade class. After reading “We the people,” she paused to ask the children what they thought that meant.
One boy raised his hand and asked, “Is that like ‘We da bomb?’”
“’Graphic novel’ is a term used by geeks who don’t want you to know they still read comic books.” -Craig Ferguson
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“The debt deal calls for the formation of a ‘super Congress’ to take on tougher decisions down the road. In case you’re wondering, a super Congress consists of six congressmen from each party, plus Wolverine.” -Conan O’Brien
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“You can no longer eat plants and berries from Central Park. I know what you’re thinking: ‘Now where do we go for dinner?’” -David Letterman
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One afternoon, while touring the Canyonlands of southern Utah, my husband and I pulled into the only hotel in a small town. While signing the register, we asked the young woman behind the desk if our room was air-conditioned.
When she shook her head no, we hesitated, wondering if we should push on to the next town. Sensing our doubt, she brightened as she came up with a solution. “Just turn on the heater,” she suggested. “Our customers tell us all that comes out is cold air anyway.”
*——————— Guaranteed to Roll Your Eyes ———————*
Most people assume WWJD is for “What would Jesus do?”. But the initials really have been changed to stand for “What would Jesus drive?”
One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old Plymouth because the Bible says, “God drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden of Eden in a Fury.”
But in Psalm 83, the Almighty clearly owns a Pontiac and a Geo. The passage urges the Jesus to “pursue your enemies with your Tempest and terrify them with your Storm.”
Perhaps God favors Dodge pickup trucks, because Moses’ followers are warned not to go up a mountain “until the Ram’s horn sounds a long blast.”
Some scholars insist that Jesus drove a Honda but didn’t like to talk about it. As proof, they cite a verse in St. John’s gospel where Christ tells the crowd, “For I did not speak of my own Accord...”
Meanwhile, Moses rode an old British motorcycle, as evidenced by a Bible passage declaring that “the roar of Moses’ Triumph is heard in the hills.”
Joshua drove a Triumph sports car with a hole in its muffler: “Joshua’s Triumph was heard throughout the land.” And, following Jesus’ lead, the Apostles car pooled in a Honda... “The Apostles were in one Accord.”
Barack Obama was touring the countryside in his chauffeur-driven limo. Suddenly, a donkey jumps out onto the road, they hit it full on and the car comes to a stop. Obama says to the chauffeur: ‘You get out and check, you were driving.’ The chauffeur gets out, checks and reports that the animal is dead.
‘You were driving; go and tell the farmer,’ says Obama.
Hours later, the chauffeur returns totally plastered, hair ruffled with a big grin on his face. ‘My god, what happened to you?’ asks Obama. The chauffeur replies: ‘When I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of whiskey, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me.’
‘What on earth did you say to them?’ asks Obama.
‘I knocked on the door, and when it was answered, I said to them, ‘I’m Barack Obama’s chauffeur and I’ve just killed the donkey.
That is goooood!!
Well, that’s one more guy facing unemployment thanks to Obama. :)
The state’s tax-free weekend will be Friday, Saturday and Sunday, marking the 12th year Texans will be able to save a little extra cash on back-to-school shopping.
TAX-FREE SHOPPING
Listed are some of the qualifying items that are exempt from sales tax this weekend, if priced less than $100. Texas’ sales tax holiday is this Friday through Sunday. For an extended list, visit www.window.state.tx.us.
SUPPLIES
binders
book bags
calculators
cellophane tape
blackboard chalk
compasses
composition books
crayons
erasers
folders; expandable, pocket, plastic and manila
glue, paste and paste sticks
highlighters
index cards
index card boxes
legal pads
lunch boxes
markers
notebooks
paper: loose-leaf ruled notebook paper, copy paper, graph paper, tracing paper, manila paper, colored paper, poster board and construction paper
pencil boxes and other school supply boxes
pencil sharpeners
pencils
pens
protractors
rulers
scissors
writing tablets
CLOTHING AND ACCESSORIES
baby clothes
backpacks for use by elementary and secondary students
belts with attached buckles
boots: cowboy, hiking
caps/hats: baseball, fishing, golf, knitted
coats and wraps
diapers: adult and baby
dresses
gloves (generally)
gym suits and uniforms
hooded shirts and hooded sweatshirts
hosiery
jackets
jeans
jerseys: baseball and football
jogging apparel
neckwear and ties
pajamas
pants and trousers
raincoats and ponchos
robes
shirts
shoes: sandals, slippers, sneakers, tennis, walking
socks (including athletic)
shorts
suits, slacks and jackets
sweatshirts and sweat suits
sweaters
swimsuits
underclothes
work clothes and uniforms
The Pig
Walking home one night, this guy hears a, “Psst! Psst!-give me a hand with this pig would you?”
Looking into the shadows the guy sees his neighbor holding onto a restless and aggitated pig. “What the heck are you planning to do with that?” he asks.
“I’m carrying it indoors and putting in the bath tub.”
“Why do you wanna do a crazy thing like that?”
“Well, you see, it’s my wife. She is one of those women who knows EVERYTHING! I tell her that the price of petrol has shot up again...she says I know! I tell her there is more trouble in the East again ... she says I know! I tell her Francis down the street is getting a divorce and she knows that, too. Well, tomorrow morning, since she always gets up before me, I’ll wait for her to come running to me screaming ‘THERE’S A PIG IN THE BATH! THERE’S A PIG IN BATH!’”
And I’ll just turn to her and say, “Yeah, I know!”
Over the top....
Do you have someone you could call in the middle of the night if you needed help? Bible teacher Ray Pritchard calls these people “2 a.m. friends.” If you have an emergency, this kind of friend would ask you two questions: “Where are you?” and “What do you need?”
Friends like that are crucial during difficult times. Jonathan was that type of friend for David. Jonathan’s father, King Saul—who was filled with envy at David’s popularity and God’s blessing on him—tried to kill him (1 Sam. 19:9-10). David escaped and asked his friend for help (ch. 20). While David hid in the field, Jonathan sat at dinner with his father and quickly realized that Saul did indeed intend to kill David (vv.24-34).
Because of their deep friendship, Jonathan “was grieved for David” (v.34). He warned him of his father’s plan and told him he should leave (vv.41-42). David recognized what a good friend he had in Jonathan. The Bible says they wept together, “but David more so” (v.41). Their souls were “knit” together.
Do you have loving Christian friends you can count on in a crisis? Are you someone your friends would call a “2 a.m. friend”?
Read: 1 Samuel 20:30-42
Rules For Choosing A Superhero Name
Don’t call yourself by your real name: e.g., The Incredible Jenny Pinchuck, The Amazing Stevie Foster.
Don’t call yourself by someone else’s real name: e.g., Super Teddy Kennedy, Captain Dean Martin.
Choose a name that suggests power, heroism and prowess: e.g., Captain Power, Thunderman, Mr. Invincible, Justiceman.
Don’t be too modest: e.g., Mr. Pretty Good, Captain So-so, Fairly Incredibleman, Captian Invincible on a good day.
But don’t labor the point: e.g., Mr. So-Powerful- Don’t-Even-Think-About-It-Buddy.
Don’t choose a name detrimental to your crime fighting image: e.g.,Captain Spongecake, Mr. Silly, Yellow Streak, Purple Slippers, Captain Sweetiepie.
Don’t choose the name of an existing Superhero unless you have lots of money and enjoy fighting litigation instead of supervillains.
It’s no use calling yourself Captain Invincible if your only power is control over Hostess Twinkies and you suffer from a congenial hole-in-the-heart condition. It’s just asking for trouble.
Don’t call yourself the Invisible Boy if you’re not.
Don’t call yourself the Invisible Boy if you’re a girl.
Don’t give away important information in your name, e.g. The Glass Jaw, Captain Vulnerable To Strontium 90.
Don’t call yourself The Green Avenger if you wear an orange costume. You’ll confuse people.
Wrong Way
As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Highway 401. Please be careful!”
“Hun,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car. It’s hundreds of them!”
Receiving E-mail
As you are receiving e-mail, it’s wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally and with serious consequences.
Consider the case of the Michigan man who left the snow-filled streets of Detroit for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick e-mail.
Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her e-mail address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher’s wife, whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her e-mail, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. Hearing the scream, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:
“Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.
P.S. Sure is hot down here!”
True. True. True.
Somehow Mom’s get to be the bad guys ... much of the time.
Fact:
An estimated 1,000,000 dogs in the U.S. have been named as the primary beneficiaries in their owner’s will.
Fact:
A cat’s heart beats twice as fast as a human heart, at 110 to 140 beats per minute.
~Wonderful WFW Wishes To All~
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Lamh Foistenach Abu!
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