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Posted on 04/30/2011 10:02:07 PM PDT by JustAmy
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Weather was beautiful, Teenie. I love this type of weather ... Can’t beat spring and fall in the valley.
Me too...unfortunately, we know Summer and Winter are inevitable!
Osama’s Valentine
Little David comes home from first grade and tells his father that they learned about the history of Valentine’s Day. “Since Valentine’s Day is for a Christian saint and we’re Jewish,” he asks, “will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?”
David’s father thinks a bit, then says “No, I don’t think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?”
“Osama Bin Laden,” David says.
“Why Osama Bin Laden?” his father asks in shock.
“Well,” David says, “I thought that if a little American Jewish boy could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we’re not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit. And if other kids saw what I did and sent valentines to Osama, he’d love everyone a lot. And then he’d start going all over the place to tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn’t hate anyone anymore.”
His father’s heart swells and he looks at his boy with newfound pride.
“David, that’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever heard.”
“I know,” David says, “and once that gets him out in the open, the Navy Seals shoot him.”
Lessons Learned By A Mother
1. A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2,000 sq. foot house four inches deep.
2. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with rollerblades, they can ignite.
3. A 3-year-old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
4. If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a superman cape. It is strong enough, however, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20X20 foot room.
5. You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
6. The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
7. When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh”, it’s already too late.
8. Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9. A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock, even though a 36-year-old man says they only do it in the movies. A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
10. Certain Lego’s will pass right through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
11. Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
12. Super glue is forever.
13. No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
14. Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15. VCR’s do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
16. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17. Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18. You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
19. Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys do not like ovens.
20. The fire department in Austin has a 5 minute response time.
21. The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms dizzy. It will however make cats dizzy and cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
Painful Love
Both my fiancé and I are in our 40s. I thought it was both amusing and touching when he assumed the classic position to propose to me—down on one bended knee.
“Are you serious?” I asked, laughing.
“Of course I’m serious,” he said. “I’m on my bad knee.”
I’ve been amazed at the impact that my wife, Martie, has had on the lives of our kids. Very few roles demand the kind of unconditional, self-sacrificing perseverance and commitment as that of motherhood. I know for certain that my character and faith have been shaped and molded by my mom, Corabelle. Let’s face it, where would we be without our wives and mothers?
It reminds me of one of my favorite memories in sports history. Phil Mickelson walked up the 18th fairway at the Masters Golf Tournament in 2010 after his final putt to clinch one of golf’s most coveted prizes for the third time. But it wasn’t his victory leap on the green that had an impact on me. It was when he made a beeline through the crowd to his wife, who was battling life-threatening cancer. They embraced, and the camera caught a tear running down Phil’s cheek as he held his wife close for a long time.
Our wives need to experience the kind of sacrificial, selfless love that has been shown to us by the Lover of our souls. As Paul put it, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her” (Eph. 5:25). Prizes come and go, but it’s the people you love—and who love you—that matter most.
Read: Ephesians 5:22-33
Yes, I did mean CORN FRITTERS, my fingers can’t hit the right keys, (I think they went union)
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This is great .... I wonder where you can get those bumper stickers,
Thanks for sharing, JOHNN.
Have a Wonderful WFWednesday.
Great photo.
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Lamh Foistenach Abu!
22.Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23.For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24.Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
25.Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26.That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27.That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28.So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29.For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30.For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31.For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
32.This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33.Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
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Both husbands and wives have responsibility and accountability here. (not in fashion with the mores of today).
This is from the New Testament. We are to follow it's commands. God's plan is always the best plan, remember this. It makes for a life of peace. A house divided can not stand.
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