Dear Urban Cyclists: Go Play in Traffic

A fibrosis of bicycle lanes is spreading through the cities of the world. The well-being of innocent motorists is threatened as traffic passageways are choked by the spread of dull whirs, sharp whistles and sanctimonious pedal-pushing.

Bike lanes have appeared in all the predictable places—Amsterdam, Copenhagen, Berkeley and Palo Alto. But the incidence of bike lanes is also on the rise in unlikely locales such as slush-covered Boston, rain-drenched Vancouver, frozen Montreal and Bogotá, Colombia (where, perhaps, bicycles have been given the traffic lanes previously reserved for drug mules). Even Dublin, Ireland, has had portions of its streets set aside for bicycles only—surely unnecessary in a country where everyone's car has been repossessed.

Then there is the notorious case of New York City. Not long ago the only people who braved New York on bicycles were maniacal bike messengers and children heeding an abusive parent's command to "go play in traffic." Now New York has 670 miles of bike lanes—rather more than it has miles of decently paved streets.

Except that in most places roads are funded through fees and taxes directed specifically at drivers.

In Texas I know for a fact that is not true, and I strongly suspect that most everywhere else, roads are paid for from the general fund. Furthermore, you incorrectly assume that either one is exclusively a cyclist or exclusively a motorist. Even if a cyclist owns a car but never drives it, all of those fees and registration are paid for by the individual who is also a cyclist. If anything the amortized costs of those registration fees are more than made up for because the cyclist uses far less space and has zero effect on the pavement.

Cyclists, unless run-over and injured by hatefilled Freepers with their 3/4 ton pickup trucks fitted with grill guards, are less burden on the health care system than the typical burger chomping motorist. Cyclists aren't killing people on the roadway by cycling drunk or texting instead of driving, yet motorists routinely jeopardize others by their careless behavior. Bicycles also don't contribute to road wear and pot holes, nor to smog. So from a social economic standpoint, motorists are costing cyclists in increased road-repair, health and energy costs. Where is the love?

I simply believe that users of the roads should pay for them

The city often spends tax money on parks, baseball and soccer fields, pools, ice-rinks, community centers, July fireworks, children's exercise programs and a vast host of other recreational venues and activities. So its OK when you use the tax-payer paid park or library without paying a "user fee", but somehow its sinful and evil for a cyclist to use a tax-payer paid roadway to go to work or the store. That is a remarkably bigoted view towards a class of people.

You pretend that only privately owned passenger vehicle operators use the roads. How do you think products get to the store? Magic? How do kids get to school or to any of the aforementioned tax-payer paid for "free" recreation venues? Teleportation? How about Emergency services? Trash pick-up? Should elderly people and the handicapped who are shut in be refused the mail, paper delivery, sanitation, emergency services because they aren't making regular contributions to the roadway through vehicle registration taxes? All of Society benefits from paved roadways, and it is silly to assume that roads are only for you.

Why aren't you throwing rocks at people who ride the bus? According to you, they aren't paying their fair share. And why aren't you all up in arms whenever a teenager hits the streets with her friends going to the mall? They aren't paying road use taxes since they don't own or rent property. Why don't you get outraged when kids play basketball down in the cul-de-sac? Same roadway, they are using it for recreation and yet you aren't screaming at the top of your lungs demanding that they get the hell off the street unless they pay tribute.

Are you out on the city or state limits ready to shake down any out of state driver who might just happen to use the roads but not buy something as they are just passing through? Is there pent-up rage towards the operator of a Volt or Leaf?

Nah, its just better to hate some anonymous stranger who is innocently pedaling along minding their own business. For all you know that cyclist might be pedaling to work while many motorists are just tooling around shuffling their offspring from one taxpayer paid for "free" recreation venue to another.

OK, it's when I lived in another state, and there was a 20-mile bike trail. My wife and I were doing some late-season riding (October), and were towing the cubs along in a Burley. In this state, the wind shifts to blow in your face no matter which way you're riding; and I *swear* that when we reached the 20-mile point and turned around, the wind shifted directions for the sole purpose of continuing to taunt us by blowing in our face all the way home.

Anyway, after the ride, we were pretty worn out, and we stopped a C-store for carbs and such. The bikes were on a cheapy rack on the back of the car. We hear a scraping CRUNCH and ran out. Yep, some clown had backed into our car.

And yes, I *do* mean a clown. It was right before Halloween, and the driver of the other car was in a clown suit. Obviously on his way to a party, as we were nowhere near Washington DC.

After we got the insurance information, we surveyed the damage: despite the fact our car had been hit so hard it had left skid marks on the ground, it was undamaged. As luck would have it, all the damage was to my new Cannondale R800.

Well, after yanking around the insurance company, they agreed to give the price of a USED bike of that age. But that's when the bike shop stepped in, and appealed to Cannondale, who has a pretty good replacement program. However, since this was a rural area, the bike shop wasn't officially an authorized Cannondale dealer. So Cannondale hedged: they sent a replacement frame, but required the dealer to salvage all our old components, cogs, shifters...

And, as luck would have it, since it was so late in the season, Cannondale didn't have the exact frame anymore, so they gave me a free upgrade to the next higher frame, the R1000. So I had the Shimano 105 components from the R800, on the R1000 frame. A "hybrid" if you will.

And it's the same main road bike I'm riding today in events (MN Ironman, MS 150, etc.)

Cheers!

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