Posted on 06/11/2010 7:13:05 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Flag of America
Flag of Australia
Flag of Brazil
Flag of France
Flag of Greece
Flag of India
Flag of Italy.
Flag of Switzerland
Flag of Vietnam
Flag of Japan. Of course with raw fish...
Flag of Lebanon
Flag of South Korea
Flag of Spain
Flag of Mexico
Urp!
#82!
Today is a kick back and do nothing day. I’m auditioning for American Idle.
Snicker -— what is the name of that cartoon? Physco and something? I can’t remember.
Arizona Sheriff Entrance Exam:
A man in Texas looking to join the Frio County Sheriffs Dept. was being interviewed.
The Sergeant doing the interview says, “Your qualifications look good, but there’s an attitude suitability test you must pass before you can be accepted.”
Then, sliding a Smith and Wesson 45 pistol across the desk, he says to the man, “Take this pistol; go out and shoot six illegal aliens, six meth dealers, six Muslim extremists, six ‘Progressive Liberal’ democrats, and a rabbit.”
“Why the rabbit?” the man asked.
“That’s the attitude we’re looking for!” said the Sergeant, “When can you start?”
=
A six year old goes to the hospital with her grandmother to visit her Grandpa.
When they get to the hospital, she runs ahead of her Grandma and bursts into her
Grandpa’s room .. “Grandpa, Grandpa,” she says excitedly, “As soon as Grandma comes into
the room, make a noise like a frog!” “What?” said her Grandpa. “Make a noise like a frog - because
Grandma said that as soon as you croak, we’re all going to Disney Land !
AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, I TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT MY WIFE ONE DAY AND SAID, “Darling, 44 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP APARTMENT, A CHEAP CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GIRL. NOW I HAVE A $500,000.00 HOME, A $45,000.00 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN TV, BUT I’M SLEEPING WITH A 65-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU’RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF THINGS.”
MY WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD ME TO GO OUT AND FIND A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GAL, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV.
AREN’T OLDER WOMEN GREAT? THEY REALLY KNOW HOW TO SOLVE YOUR MID-LIFE CRISIS.
Your tagline question is what I would like to know. One of these days I will get to ask GOD why?
YIKES! That’ll save on dental bills.
You and me both Annie.
It’s a prickly subject.
A cannibal was walking through the jungle and came upon a restaurant operated by a fellow cannibal.
Feeling somewhat hungry, he sat down and looked over the menu:
*Tourist:
$5.00
*Broiled Missionary:
$10.00
*Fried Explorer:
$15.00
*Baked Democrat:
$100.00
The cannibal called the waiter over and asked, “Why such a high price for the Politicians?”
The cook replied, “Have you ever tried to clean one? They’re so full of crap, it takes all morning.”
HAHAHA! I’ll bet he ran away because he couldn’t stand the racket from the drum or the fact that his owner Tom is an even bigger idiot. :o)
One oh oh!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.