****OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS (SPRING FORWARD) THREAD****

http://webexhibits.org/daylightsaving/b.html ^ | March 9, 2007 | Lucky9teen

[andy58-in-nh]

Now that's a horse of a different color.

[BJClinton]

That was a tactical nuclear pun.

A mean a pun of mass destruction.

[Lady Jag]

You called?

[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

[andy58-in-nh]

[PBRSTREETGANG]

[Lucky9teen]

[Lucky9teen]

[HOTTIEBOY]

ME

[Lady Jag]

[Lady Jag]

Running on Rainbow Beach

[Lady Jag]

[Lucky9teen]

Hillary Clinton called Bill into her office one day and said, "Bill, I have a great idea! I know how we can win back middle America and secure my presidential victory in 2008."

"Great, but how so you propose we go about that", asked Bill? "Are we gonna have someone knock off Obamba like we did Vince Foster?"

"No silly", Hillary responds, "we'll go down to a local Wal-Mart, get some cheezy clothes and shoes like most middle Americans wear, and then we'll stop at the pound and pick up a Labrador. When we look the part, we'll go to a nice old country bar somewhere in middle America and show them that we really enjoy the countryside, and show admiration and respect for the hard working people living there."

A few days later, all decked out and with the requisite Labrador at heel, they set off from New York in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at just the place they were looking for.

With the dog in tow, they walk into a bar. When they stepped up to the bar, the bartender takes a step back and says, "Aren't you Bill and Hillary Clinton?"

"Yes we are", says Hillary, "and what a lovely town you have here. We were just passing through and Bill suggested we stop and take in some local color."

They then order a couple of cocktails and proceed to drink them down, all the while, chatting up a storm with anyone who would listen.

All of a sudden... the bar room door opens and a grizzled old farmer comes in. He walks up to the Labrador, lifts its tail, and looks underneath, shrugs his shoulders and walks out the door.

A few moments later, in comes another old farmer... walks up to the dog, lifts its tail, looks underneath, scratches his head and then leaves the bar.

Over the course of the next hour or so, another four or five farmers came in, lifted the dog's tail, and went away looking puzzled.

Eventually Hillary and Bill could stand it no longer and called the bartender over.

"Tell me", says Hillary, "why did all those old farmers come in and look under the dog's tail like that? Is it some sort of cute old custom?"

"Good Lord no", said the bartender. "Its just that someone had told them there was a Labrador in this bar with two Assholes!"

[Lucky9teen]

---

One sunny day in 2008, an old man approached the White House from across Pennsylvania Avenue , where he'd been sitting on a park bench. He spoke to the Marine standing guard and said, "I would like to go in and meet with President Hillary Clinton."

The Marine replied, "Sir, Mrs. Clinton is not President and doesn't reside here."

The old man said, "Okay," and walked away.

The following day, the same man approached the White House and said to the same Marine, "I would like to go in and meet with President Hillary Clinton".

The Marine again told the man, "Sir, as I said yesterday, Mrs. Clinton is not President and doesn't reside here."

The man thanked him and again walked away . .

The third day, the same man approached the White House and spoke to the very same Marine, saying "I would like to go in and meet with President Hillary Clinton."

The Marine, understandably agitated at this point, looked at the man and said, "Sir, this is the third day in a row you have been here asking to speak to Mrs. Clinton. I've told you already several times that Mrs. Clinton is not the President and doesn't reside here. Don't you understand?"

The old man answered, "Oh, I understand you just fine. I just love hearing your answer!"

The Marine snapped to attention, saluted, and said, "See you tomorrow."

[John O]

That was a tactical nuclear pun.

A mean a pun of mass destruction.

Oh! So WOW was an exclamation of extreme enjoyment.

In that case I shall post another!

I was over at the parents the other day. We had just finished eating and I volunteered to do the dishes. (I figure if I do this about twice a year they'll know better than to ask me . I'm very slow at it.)

After getting the dishes pre-rinsed (who want's all that icky stuff in the water) and doing a few loads of dishes I was ready to do the pans (mom had made a wonderful roast with carrots and potatoes. Yum Yum . But the pan was dark with burned on grease and stuff)

Mom came over and put the pan into the water (Without rinsing it first!!! ) and the water turned very dark.

"ICK" I said. "I'm not putting my hands into that"

Mom told me to chill out, reached across the sink and put more dish soap into the water and it cleared right up!!

"John" she said "You know it's always darkest before the Dawn"

[Lucky9teen]

Hillary vs. Condi Ho-Down

[Lucky9teen]

Presidential candidates, Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama and John Edwards were flying to a convention.

Barack looked at Hillary, chuckled and said, "You know, I could throw a $1,000 bill out of the window right now and make somebody very happy."

Hillary shrugged her shoulders and replied, "I could throw ten $100 bills out of the window and make ten people very happy."

John added, "That being the case, I could throw one hundred $10 bills out of the window and make a hundred people very happy."

Hearing their exchange, the pilot rolled his eyes and said to his co-pilot, "Such big-shots back there. I could throw all of them out of the window and make 156 million people very happy."

[Lucky9teen]

Hillary in 2008? Pretty funny...