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What your car says about you
NyCap ^ | 12/04 | staff

Posted on 05/08/2005 8:12:28 AM PDT by pissant

Acura Legend: I have always yearned to own the Buick of sports cars

Acura Vigor: I wanted a Legend, but couldn't afford one

Audi 90: I enjoy extinguishing engine fires

BMW 318i: I love my father, whose girlfriend is my age

BMW M3: I am practical with a huge debt

Buick Grand National: I buy four new tires a week

Buick Park Avenue : I am older than 34 of the 50 states

Cadillac Fleetwood: I'm driving myself to the cemetary

Cadillac Eldorado: I'm the saleswoman of the month for Mary Kay cosmetics

Cadillac Seville: I'm a hairy-chested pimp with a fat gold chain

Chevrolet Camaro: I enjoy beating people up to compensate for my inadequacies

Chevrolet Chevette: I love to see peoples' reactions when I tell them I drive a 'Vette

Chevrolet Corvette: I'm going through a mid-life crisis

Chevrolet El Camino: I'm leading a militia to overthrow our overbearing government

Chrysler Cordoba: I dig the rich Corinthian leather

Chevrolet Lumina: Well, it was time for a new lease and the Dodge Stratus just wasn't for me

Datsun 280Z: I've got a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well

Dodge Dart: I teach 3rd grade special education and I voted for Eisenhower

Dodge Daytona: I delivered pizzas for 4 years to pay for this car

Dodge Stealth: I like this body style, but couldn't afford it as a Mistubishi 3000GT

Dodge Stratus: Well, it was time for a new lease and the Chevy Lumina just wasn't for me

Ford Bronco: I purchased this car during the Simpson trial, with the expectation that it would appreciate in value when he was found guilty

Ford Crown Victoria: I get a kick out of pulling up right behind people and watching them slow down to below the speed limit and sweat bullets until I turn off

Ford Explorer: I'm a yuppie whose meaning of off-roading is setting down my cell phone to negotiate a construction cone

Ford Expedition: As a red-blooded American, I feel obligated to consume as much fossil fuel as is humanly possible during my relatively brief and insignificant lifespan on this planet

Ford Excursion I was going to buy a Ford Expedition, but it's double-digit gas mileage just wasn't for me

Ford Fairmont: (See Dodge Dart)

Ford Mustang : I love to peel out while my teenage buddies cackle like idiots in the back seat

Ford Probe: I can't afford a real sports car

Ford Windstar: I have four children, all of whom play soccer

Geo Storm: I will start the 11th grade in the fall

Geo Tracker: I will start the 12th grade in the fall

Honda Accord: I lack any originality and am basically a lemming

Honda Civic: Gosh, with some stiff, low suspension, alloy wheels and a big chrome exhaust pipe, I've got a few people convinced this car is actually FAST

Honda Del Sol: I have always said that half a convertible is better than no convertible at all

Honda Element: I'm trying to cling to the fond memories of my childhood when I used to "drive" a cardboard refrigerator box

Hyundai Accent: I wanted a new car, but only had enough money for a used car

Infiniti G20: I'm pretending to be rich

Infiniti Q45 : I am a physician with 17 malpractice suits pending

Isuzu Impulse: I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports

Jaguar XJ6: I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that is in the shop 280 days per year

Kia Sephia: I learned nothing from the failure of the Diahatsu Corporation

Lincoln Town Car: I live for Bingo and covered dish suppers

Mazda 323: I only drive to get somewhere

Mazda 626: I only drive to get somewhere, but decided I wanted to spoil myself

Mercury Grand Marquis: My blue-haired wife insists I drive this speed, lest my become aggravated

Mercedes 500SL: I will beat you up if you ask me for an autograph

Mazda Miata: I do not fear being decapitated by an 18-wheeler

MGB: I am dating a mechanic

Mitsubishi 3000GT: I'm a rich pasty white guy who wears wrap-around sunglasses

Mitsubishi Diamante: I don't know what it means either

Mitsubishi Eclipse: I bought it because car with a spoiler this size has got to be the end-all, be-all of contemporary sports cars

Nissan 300ZX: I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings

Nissan Maxima: This car looked really stupid until I tinted the windows, installed fake chrome hubcaps, and put a couple of crown air fresheners in the rear window

Oldmobile Cutlass: I just stole this car and I'm going to make a fortune off the parts

Peugeot 505 Diesel: I am on the EPA's "Ten Most Wanted" List

Plymouth Neon: I'm incessantly bubbly and enjoy doing the macarena

Pontiac Fiero: I wanted to challenge my patience and mechanical ability by purchasing a car that needs its engine dropped to change the spark plugs

Pontiac Trans Am: I have a switchblade in my sock

Porsche 944: I am dating big-haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow: With all of this grandeur, Grey Poupon is a must

Saturn SL: I was in the market for a cheap plastic car outfitted with an anemic powertrain whose engine tolerances are larger than the Grand Canyon

Saturn SC: I wanted to own a plastic car, and a Saturn SL was out of my price range

Subaru Legacy: I have always wanted a Japanese car even more than common sense

Toyota Camry: I am still in the closet

Volkswagen Beetle: I still watch Partridge Family reruns

Volkswagen Cabriolet: I am out of the closet

Volkswagen Golf: I'm an opinionated college kid who basically bought this car to use as a billboard for all of my wacky bumper stickers

Volkswagen Jetta: I'm a single blonde in my twenties (of course the sunglasses are designer!)

Volkswagen Microbus: My most cherished possessions besides this car are my tie-dyed T-shirt, roach clip, and a tarnished 8x10 glossy of Jerry Garcia

Volvo 240 Sedan: I voted for Gore, and am a member of the Sierra Club

Volvo 740 Wagon : I am frightened of my wife

Volvo 740 Turbo Wagon: I am only somewhat frightened of my wife


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: autos; zoom
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To: pissant

My car just tells me (and anyone else who will listen) I'm cheap because it want's the highest octane gasoline and I wont feed that to it. You should hear the temper tantrums it throws!! :)


81 posted on 05/08/2005 12:31:29 PM PDT by trussell (Prayers for the children!)
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To: pissant
The engine weighs 3 times as much as the rest of the car! Yikes.

Actually the Cadillac Northstar is aluminum. It isn't that heavy.

82 posted on 05/08/2005 12:48:08 PM PDT by Echo Talon (http://echotalon.blogspot.com)
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To: pissant

umm, the way I see it...I'm in the same category as Laura Bush and Lynn Cheney. Ain't bad I suppose, except I'm a guy.


83 posted on 05/08/2005 3:03:22 PM PDT by dit_xi (Fingers and tubes in every orifice (tenet of critical care medicine))
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To: pissant

RE the Ford Bronco: Saw a license plate around here on a white Bronco that reads "OJ's REPO".


84 posted on 05/08/2005 6:19:24 PM PDT by Moonmad27
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To: pissant
But boy, those fancy mufflers sure sound fast!

Here's the mathematical explanation for you:

There is an inverse relationship between the size of the muffler on a Honda & the size of the johnson on the driver.

85 posted on 05/08/2005 6:37:10 PM PDT by ChildOfThe60s (If you can remember the 60s......you weren't really there.)
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To: dit_xi

Yeah, and I don't fit in either........where in the #*&% are the Lexus SUV's?


86 posted on 05/08/2005 7:23:58 PM PDT by IvySterling
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To: pissant

Lexus RX300: I have zero patience with auto repairs. ;)


87 posted on 05/08/2005 7:27:36 PM PDT by Mr. Jeeves ("Violence never settles anything." Genghis Khan, 1162-1227)
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To: Mr. Jeeves

RX300: I wanted a tall Camry and got WAY overcharged.

LX470: I wanted a Land Cruiser with leather.


88 posted on 05/08/2005 11:41:28 PM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: patton
My wife's GTO has the same spoiler.
She won't let me drive it.
89 posted on 05/09/2005 7:58:21 AM PDT by Graycliff ("Life is just one darn thing after another; LOVE is just two darn things after each other.")
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To: pissant

Toyota 4Runner: I like mine. Reliable, Roomy, Toyota


90 posted on 05/09/2005 10:06:43 AM PDT by hattend (Alaska....in a time warp all it's own!)
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To: hattend

Yep, Toyotas are nice chick cars....


91 posted on 05/09/2005 10:08:02 AM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant
Yep, Toyotas are nice chick cars....

That's why they are so trouble free and reliable...chicks can't fix 'em.

My wife likes our 4Runner, so do I.

I drive Fords for work...I hate them.

92 posted on 05/09/2005 10:20:34 AM PDT by hattend (Alaska....in a time warp all it's own!)
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To: hattend

Yeah, my wife won't drive my Fords. Most women hate 'em.


93 posted on 05/09/2005 10:21:47 AM PDT by pissant (Dead Terrorists are a good thing)
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To: pissant

My masculinity is not threatened LOL


94 posted on 05/09/2005 10:27:54 AM PDT by hattend (Alaska....in a time warp all it's own!)
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To: LibKill

Chevy Trucks...

Solid...

Like a Rock

The only vehicle that looks better than my Chevy truck is my Chevy truck pulling my boat.


95 posted on 05/09/2005 11:13:19 AM PDT by fredhead ("It is a good thing war is so terrible, or we should grow too fond of it." General Robert E. Lee)
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To: pissant
"Volvo 240 Sedan: I voted for Gore, and am a member of the Sierra Club"

Hmmm, I must have been taking a leak when they were handing out Sierra Club memberships at the Volvo convention.

My Volvo sedan and a sign that will irk every other Volvo driver.

And a little something to irk the Stormfront guys who come here ;).

96 posted on 05/09/2005 11:16:02 AM PDT by TypeZoNegative (Future Minnesota Refugee)
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To: TypeZoNegative

BTW, I just took those pictures 5 minutes ago.


97 posted on 05/09/2005 11:16:30 AM PDT by TypeZoNegative (Future Minnesota Refugee)
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To: TypeZoNegative

Lemme guess, cell phone camera?


98 posted on 05/09/2005 11:17:35 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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To: Spktyr

No. Palm Zire 71 camera.

99 posted on 05/09/2005 11:20:05 AM PDT by TypeZoNegative (Future Minnesota Refugee)
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To: TypeZoNegative

Similar item. The "quality" was what gave it away...


100 posted on 05/09/2005 11:22:17 AM PDT by Spktyr (Overwhelmingly superior firepower and the willingness to use it is the only proven peace solution.)
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