THE WOLF MAN
The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office.
"How was work, dear?" his wife asks.
"Listen! I don't want to talk about work!" he shouts.
"Okay. Would you like to sit down and eat a nice home cooked meal?" she asks nicely.
"Listen!" he shouts again. "I'm not hungry! I don't wanna eat! Alright! Is that alright with you? Can I come home from work and just do my own thing without you forcing food down my throat? Huh?"
At this moment, the wolf man started growling, and throwing things around the apartment in a mad rage.
Looking out the window, his wife sees a full moon and says to herself, "Well, I guess it's that time of the month."
**************
I hope all the net nannies have gone to bed.
Heh Heh Heh
Must Be A Redneck
A Frenchman, an Englishman and a Redneck are captured by a fierce tribe of Indians. The chief walks up to them and says, "I have bad news and good news. The bad news is you will all die, and we will use your skin to make canoes. The good news is you can choose the way you die."
The Frenchman says, "I take ze poison." When given the poison, the Frenchman shouts, "Viva la France!" and drinks it down.
The Englishman says, "A pistol for me." When given the pistol, the Englishman puts the gun to his head and shouts, "God save the queen!" and shoots himself in the head.
The Redneck asks for a fork. Puzzled, the chief hands the Redneck a fork, and he begins stabbing himself all over his body, his stomach, his sides, his chest ... everywhere. As the blood from the redneck begins gushing out all over, the chief is appalled and screams, "What are you doing?"
The Redneck looks at the chief and says, "So much for your canoe, Bubba!".
Hahahaha! That's a good one too. I'll have to remember that joke.