Posted on 09/09/2024 2:19:10 PM PDT by DFG
SPRINGFIELD, OH — A Chinese food buffet was forced to close Monday after Haitian immigrants completely decimated the local Chinese food supply.
"This business has been in my family for many years, said Duke Wong, owner of Happy China Yum Yum in Springfield, Ohio. "With 20,000 Haitian migrants roaming the town, all our delicious local ingredients have disappeared."
According to sources, Happy China Yum Yum was the preferred source of delicious Chinese dishes such as orange "chicken," and Mongolian "beef" in the area. Over the last several years, however, their business model has become unsustainable.
"I took my cooler down to the park the other day, and there weren't even any geese," Chiang lamented. "Um, I mean, chicken. I couldn't find any chicken at the park."
Chiang, who escaped from China forty years ago, became an American citizen legally with the dream of serving "chicken," "beef," and "fish" to as many customers as possible. Sadly, his dream is dying.
"I wish Trump would build the wall," he said.
At publishing time, Duke Wong had escaped to open a new restaurant in the greener pastures of Upper Sandusky, Ohio.
LMAO.
All the Peking ducks have been decapitated.
Long, long ago, in a city far, far away (but in these USA) ...
A “Chinese” restaurant got busted and shut down by the local health department and the State game warden. They were baiting ducks in the back alley ... out of season and without a license, which got the game warden involved. Butchering them in the kitchen got the health department involved.
There used to be a strip mall across the street from the University of Southern California that had a food court with a Chinese takeout eatery. One of the items available was called “beef”—which it probably was, although the featured cut was apparently chitlins. In any case, I miss the place. Their food was better than that at Panda Express or other chains.
Double ouch!
Lol!
the general tso’s kitten at the local chinese place is purrfect...
(said Duke Wong)
That’s Wong, on so many Levels
(don’t have the picture handy)
House cat, it’s what’s for dinner in dystopian America.
Does this mean no more pu pu platter for four as well?
Yup, without a head it’s hard to peek.
Took to the 4th paragraph to get me:)
I thought of that sign this morning when I was at the Mexican market. They had a sign that said “No Credit, Don’t Ask For It”
Cincinnati Enquirer (D) has an article with the mayor of Springfield, Ohio saying this is not happening. While there has been an influx of 20K Haitians all are legal, paying their taxes and filling the available job openings.
Someone must be holding his pets for ransom.
Read the menu carefully. Make sure the fluffy rice isn’t Fluffy with rice.
Almost got me!
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