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Source Says Kamala Was Promoted At McDonald's After Having Affair With Mayor McCheese
Babylon Bee ^ | 09/02/2024 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/02/2024 9:49:56 AM PDT by DFG

U.S. — After skeptics questioned Kamala Harris's claim that she once worked at Mcdonald's, researchers have found evidence of her employment - and rapid promotion to shift manager - after a sordid affair with Mayor McCheese.

"It's now clear how Kamala was able to rise through the ranks from a lowly crew member at the fry station to running the entire restaurant in spite of her glaring incompetence," said Journalist Chet Cruggs, who broke the story. "This seems to be Harris's modus operandi at every place she has worked."

Mayor McCheese, the Mayor of McDonaldland who has an enormous cheeseburger for a head, vehemently denies the allegations. "My job maintaining the pristine beauty of McDonaldland's apple pie trees, thick shake volcanoes, and hamburger patches is difficult enough without wild and unfounded accusations of impropriety," he said. "I never had a sexual relationship with Shmoopie-poo, er, I mean... Kamala."

Eyewitnesses who knew Kamala at the time reported the couple taking extended breaks in the cooler and in the alleyway behind the restaurant. They would always come back looking a little disheveled, with Mayor McCheese's cheeseburger bun head all askew and covered in lipstick" said one former employee. "We all knew what they were doing back there."

At publishing time, sources also uncovered evidence of an extended work relationship Kamala had with Grimace.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 2024election; babylonbee; cheeseburger; election2024; kamala; mccheese; mcdonalds; pennsylvania
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To: MtnClimber
But eventually she dumped him for the dude they called “Big Mac”.

She went heels up over the secret sauce.

21 posted on 09/02/2024 12:06:17 PM PDT by Night Hides Not (Remember the Alamo! Remember Goliad! Remember Gonzales! Come and Take It!s)
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To: DFG
Hey Kamala, have some of my Secret Sauce!


22 posted on 09/02/2024 12:24:37 PM PDT by mikey_hates_everything
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To: DFG
...and the Grimace is the one who pimped her out.



23 posted on 09/02/2024 12:39:02 PM PDT by T.B. Yoits
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To: DFG

😂😂🤣🤣


24 posted on 09/02/2024 12:39:29 PM PDT by Allegra
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To: DFG

Dang!

The Bee almost got me again.


25 posted on 09/02/2024 12:39:31 PM PDT by fella ("As it was before Noah so shall it be again," )
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To: DFG

So that’s how she got the “special sauce” on her dress?


26 posted on 09/02/2024 1:13:32 PM PDT by RedMonqey (This is no longer America but "Amerika"!)
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To: Responsibility2nd

Ronald just got her the job. The mayor promoted her.


27 posted on 09/02/2024 8:45:01 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
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To: DFG

28 posted on 09/08/2024 9:12:01 AM PDT by McGruff (Ask everyone, Are you better off than you were four years ago?)
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