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Manhattan DA Treated Unfairly [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 March 2023 | John Semmens

Posted on 03/27/2023 10:26:53 AM PDT by John Semmens

Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg (D) lamented that "outside interference is denying me the right to give Trump the punishment he so richly deserves as an enemy of democracy." It seems that the grand jury assembled to consider whether the former president ought to be indicted is balking at handing Bragg the prize he covets.

On Monday, Robert Costello appeared before the grand jury and provided evidence indicating that Bragg's prime witness against Trump, Michael Cohen, may be lying. "I was set up," Bragg complained. "I thought that as a former legal advisor to Michael Cohen this Costello guy would bolster my case. Now he's got the grand jury confused about what to do. Grand juries are supposed to follow the DA's lead and issue the indictment he needs to take the case to trial."

"Look, I was elected DA on a platform of indicting Donald Trump," Bragg explained. "It is the people's will that Trump be indicted. Anything getting in the way of this is an attack on our democracy. Getting this done is essential to my political future. Without an indictment of Trump my chances of ever being elected mayor or governor may never be realized. The unfairness of it all is galling. They wouldn't do this to me if I was white."

In related news, eager to top New York City's generous $6 million payment to rioters earlier this month, Philadelphia has agreed to pay $9 million to 343 plaintiffs who allege they suffered physical and emotional injuries at the hands of police trying to stop the vandalism, looting, and arson carried out during a protest over the death of career criminal George Floyd while in the custody of police in Minneapolis on May 25, 2020. Mayor Jim Kenney called the settlement "a meager down payment for the centuries of slavery and discrimination inflicted on Blacks--criminals and innocents alike."

The biggest winner so far from 2020's George Floyd protests has been Black Lives Matter (BLM). The riots that accompanied many of the mostly peaceful protests in more than 200 cities resulted in $2 billion worth of damages due to vandalism, looting, and arson. In the wake of this, the Claremont Institute Center for the American Way of Life estimates that BLM managed to induce $83 billion in corporate donations to the organization and its causes. The consulting firm McKinsey and Company estimate was $340 billion.

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,494800.0.html


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: bragg; fatalvin; indictment; satire; trump

1 posted on 03/27/2023 10:26:53 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

I am not convinced he ever intended to go through with it.


2 posted on 03/27/2023 10:34:00 AM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway

He thought that the indictment would be the easiest part!...............


3 posted on 03/27/2023 10:38:37 AM PDT by Red Badger (Homeless veterans camp in the streets while illegal aliens are put up in hotels.....................)
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To: Red Badger

I think he just wanted to make some kind of show, then he would drop it.


4 posted on 03/27/2023 10:40:31 AM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: John Semmens

BS.


5 posted on 03/27/2023 10:58:14 AM PDT by depressed in 06
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To: John Semmens

Disgraced Alvin Bragg is being forced to change his name to Alvin Liberty!

(Obscure internet reference of the day)


6 posted on 03/27/2023 11:04:21 AM PDT by MMusson
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To: John Semmens
"I was set up," Bragg complained.

Channeling Marion Barry.

7 posted on 03/27/2023 12:37:14 PM PDT by rfp1234 (E Porcibus Unum )
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