Posted on 05/01/2021 12:47:13 AM PDT by John Semmens
This week a contingent of armed FBI agents raided the home of former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani (R) to confiscate an array of electronic devices. Giuliani called the raid "unnecessary. I would've voluntarily turned over all the devices requested. Oddly, the one device they refused to confiscate was a copy of the hard drive of Hunter Biden's laptop. I pointed out that my perusal of the contents found evidence of several crimes."
FBI Director Christopher Wray brushed aside Giuliani's objections, saying that "a narrative in which he can be portrayed as cooperating with our investigation was unsatisfactory. As we have done in the past with the cases of Roger Stone and Paul Manafort, the dawn raid videoed by cooperating media conveys a narrative supporting the meme that these people are so guilty and dangerous that we couldn't risk them destroying evidence or fleeing justice. Judging from the media coverage, I'd call it 'mission accomplished.'"
Wray also rejected Giuliani's contention that the Hunter Biden hard drive was of any public value. "Look, as the oldest surviving son of a sitting president, Hunter has sort of a 'crown prince' status," Wray argued. "It would not serve the interest of the government to allow a scandal to besmirch him or any member of the President's family. Rulers must be revered and respected. Any accusations—true or false—tend to undermine this vital objective. By refusing to be drawn into Giuliani's gambit we have diminished the credibility of his charges and preserved the reputation of the ruling family."
"As for the assertion that the devices we seized will prove Giuliani's innocence, well, we will be the judges of that," Wray added. "Even if there's never a trial, the impression that Giuliani is guilty of something is already out there. The FBI is America's number one law enforcement agency. We are the ones who got Dillinger. We are the heroes of many movies and several TV series. Given the choice of who to believe, we're confident that the average person will trust us more than they trust Giuliani."
If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...
https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,435684.new.html#new
ping
>> “We are the heroes of many movies and several TV series”
Along with a few Pravda favorites ;)
When I read Wrath’s statements, I forgot this was satire.
Hard to beat Babylon Bee
They raided me too at 6 am. entered my kitchen, seized all my beer and knockwurst out of my fridge , and left all of my cloned Hunter Biden drives in my office, even after I pointed them out!
I think what we ALL need...is a cloned copy of Hunter’s HD, and if LE folks ever show up...point this out and test the system if they will execute the full scope of the raid or not.
Shouldn’t Project Veritas (James O’Keefe) have a copy to link some of his own tapes for our scrutiny?
(I’ve already seen enough of it).
Golly, Wray is s-o-o-o-o-o-o good. A generous, tolerant and compassionate protector and defender of the Biden government.
(Sniffle) If only we deplorables could be as good as the government. (sob)
... they sure won't prove his innocence after we're through with them.
The FBI conduct of the search and seizure f “evidence” at Rudi’s place reveals the new weaponized FBI , a bunch of Keystone Klown Cops.
Political correctness has invaded their very exercise of a search warrant.
KEYSTONE COPS!
The should be reviled for their political partisanship.
Next they will be wearing gsztapo boots and caps.
Heil Shitler!
Satire? It's in there someplace, I'll look again.
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