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1 posted on 12/27/2020 4:46:10 AM PST by NOBO2012
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To: NOBO2012

“There’s a bathroom on the right.”

~Creedence Clearwater Revival.


2 posted on 12/27/2020 4:53:32 AM PST by dynachrome ( “The people have spoken . . . and they must be punished.” Ed Koch)
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To: NOBO2012

For years, I would use the phrase “C’est la vie!” when speaking with my pre-teen daughter. Finally, one day, after I said it again, she turned to me with annoyance and said: “La vie!”


3 posted on 12/27/2020 4:54:08 AM PST by TheConservator (Beware the tyranny of the woke mob. There has never been a greater threat to liberty.)
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To: NOBO2012

“She’s got electric boobs, her maw has too, you know I read it in a magazine.”


4 posted on 12/27/2020 5:12:20 AM PST by NonValueAdded ("Sorry, your race card has been declined. Can you present any other form of argument?")
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To: NOBO2012

These days, how many people can explain that hook coming after Bugs Bunny?


5 posted on 12/27/2020 5:19:40 AM PST by KrisKrinkle (Blessed be those who know the depth and breadth of ignorance. Cursed be those who don't.)
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To: NOBO2012

This one is the greatest of all time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nIwrgAnx6Q8

Once you have seen it, you will realize it can never be topped.


6 posted on 12/27/2020 5:40:52 AM PST by proxy_user
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To: NOBO2012

“Excuse me while I kiss this guy (kiss the sky)” - Jimi Hendrix


8 posted on 12/27/2020 5:46:57 AM PST by jeffc (I'm a Patriot, and the media are our enemy)
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To: NOBO2012

I left my brains down in Africa...


10 posted on 12/27/2020 5:51:20 AM PST by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: NOBO2012

My daughter came home from kindergarten and asked if she could get some “angry shoes”. We asked what those were and she told us that Asley has “angry shoes” and sometimes they let her out of class to sit outside.


11 posted on 12/27/2020 6:01:32 AM PST by super7man (Madam Defarge, knitting, knitting, always knitting.)
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To: NOBO2012

For half a century, I thought that when they sang “I Get Around,” the Beach Boys were singing, “I get around all the time. like a loco weed, I feel really great.’ In reality, they were singing, “I get around from town to town. I have a real cool head; I’m making real good bread.”

In “She’s a Woman,” I thought the Beatles were singing, “She don’t hit RBIs” (runs batted in), apparently meaning she doesn’t “score” with others. In reality, they’re singing, “she don’t give boys the eye.”


12 posted on 12/27/2020 6:30:11 AM PST by Fiji Hill
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To: NOBO2012

“And when I touch you
I feel happy inside
It’s such a feelin’ that my love
I GET HIGH
I GET HIGH
I GET HIGH”


13 posted on 12/27/2020 6:36:52 AM PST by Clemenza
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To: NOBO2012

My mother played Bee Gees almost constantly when I was a kid. Count me among those, who heard Barry Gibb singing: “And you come to me on a submarine...”

And, of course, who can forget Manfred Mann singing about: “Blinded by the light... Wrapped up like a douche, another boner in the night.”


15 posted on 12/27/2020 6:53:15 AM PST by Kriggerel ("All great truths are hard and bitter, but lies... are sweeter than wild honey" (Ragnar Redbeard))
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To: NOBO2012
Shy Violet instead of Sky Pilot by EB and The Animals.

My husband said he alway heard Secret Asian Man instead of Secret Agent Man by Johnny Rivers.

22 posted on 12/27/2020 7:41:16 AM PST by LoveUSA (God employs Man's strength; Satan exploits Man's weakness.)
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To: NOBO2012

For five decades, I was hearing “Satisfaction” by the Rolling Stones wrong. For one thing, I thought a baritone saxophone was playing the opening notes, but the instrument is actually a guitar plugged into some sort of electronic device.

As to the lyrics, until the Internet came along, I thought they were singing “He’s telling me more and more about some news and information,” but the actual expression is “useless information.” I heard “a man comes on and tells me I’ve got to wash my shirts with bleach” when it was actually “how white my shirts can be.” And instead of “trying to meet some girl,” the narrator actually says he’s trying to “make” some girl.


23 posted on 12/27/2020 8:24:34 AM PST by Fiji Hill
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To: NOBO2012

The hymn, “Glady the Cross-Eyed Bear”.


26 posted on 12/27/2020 9:08:42 AM PST by MayflowerMadam ("Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free" Galatians 5:1)
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To: NOBO2012

A little girl was asked to draw a picture of the Nativity along with the rest of her class. At the end of the school day, the drawings were sent home for the parents to adore and display on their refrigerators, or in another place of prominence.

Betsy’s mom was excited when her daughter told her she drew her very own picture of the Nativity. “Oh, let me see!” her mother exclaimed. When she glanced at the picture, she became rather confused. She saw an airplane drawn right in the middle of the page.

Betsy’s mom asked her daughter if this was the correct picture - the one of the Nativity.

“Of course, Mommy! You know!” replied Betsy. “That’s the flight into Egypt!!”

Her mom then looked at the figures riding in the plane and saw a very angry man in the front of the plane. “Who is this angry looking man?” her mom asked. “Mommy! Betsy answered with frustration. “That’s Pontius the Pilot!”

Her mom, feeling like she needed to “get with it” in understanding her daughter’s drawing, continued on....”I see Joseph here, and Mary,...but who is the really big guy in the back?”

With a sigh, her daughter blurted out: “You know this, Mommy! That’s round John Virgin!”


27 posted on 12/27/2020 9:14:54 AM PST by Joe 6-pack
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To: NOBO2012

The original, to me, is Louie Louie.


29 posted on 12/27/2020 9:21:32 AM PST by TangoLimaSierra (Your tagline sucked, so it was deleted - Admin)
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To: NOBO2012

Nobody has mentioned Bruce Springsteen who’s “Wrapped up like a douched in the middle of the night.”


30 posted on 12/27/2020 10:26:26 AM PST by seowulf
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