Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows

http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^ | William M Briggs

[mattstat]

A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. “If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters,” said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. “And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.”

Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. “It is well known that zombies can’t operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.”

The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. “Clearly, this is a very troubling result,” said Dr. Harrister, “If we don’t do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.”

[darkangel82]

Morning(or afternoon here.)

[Tax-chick]

Afternoon! Cold enough for you?

[rottndog]

Not so much cold here as it is wet.

[sionnsar]

‘Face, you around?

[rottndog]

If I’m cold and wet here, I’m sure MF is in some sort of low temp stasis.

[rottndog]

DOH!

[sionnsar]

You're probably correct.

It's cool here, but warmer than it usually is this time of year. Maybe a good thing for me, now that my weeklong visit to summer is over.

[Tax-chick]

It’s raining here, too. I feel like I’m in the Northwest!

[A CA Guy]

Rained all last night.

Fairly mild though, little colder, but we need the water.

[Monkey Face]

...I’m sure MF is in some sort of low temp stasis.

Er...it's just 'Face, if you don't mind.

And yes, I've been cold all morning, plus I woke up ant 0330 and couldn't get back to sleep, so I have the Slows.

Glad you're back, sion, though it sounds like the Return Flight From Hell.

[Monkey Face]

We actually need the zombies to work in the lower levels of the castle.

Although some of them have defected to the Democraps, the Dust Bunnies have put such fear into them that the zombies will do nothing but blather about the heat of the carbon footprints they leave.

Welcome!

[sionnsar]

Glad you're back, sion, though it sounds like the Return Flight From Hell.

Return Flight From Hell? No... this is the Return Flight From Hell!

[sionnsar]

Sorry to hear that. I was awake at 6:30 but I know better than to think I’m on schedule.

[rottndog]

I said DOH!....

[Tax-chick]

but we need the water.

Yes, so do we. I just don't feel like going out in the cold and wet. Anoreth was annoyed that I wouldn't go to the library!

[Monkey Face]

Yah. Right. I heard ya the first time! LOL!

[Monkey Face]

How are things going with you and the new Mrs CA Guy?

[Monkey Face]

How many pipers are there?

And was the plane airborne? The sound must have been excruciating in such a small space.

[sionnsar]

I think about a dozen piping and yes, the plane was airborne. It was a tradition for us when we flew to Ketchikan to pipe for the 4th of July, at the city’s & merchants’ expense. The band was much younger then, and things weren’t as uptight as they are now — I don’t think they do this anymore.

[sionnsar]

Suitcase just arrived...