Free Republic

Perhaps there’s a perverse rationale behind the Trump administration obstinate refusal to acknowledge the monstrous calamities threatened by global warming. Why sweat floods, droughts, forest fires, supercharged hurricanes, when the teensie maladies are gonna’ kill us first? Because the hotter it gets — and Florida is coming off the hottest July, after the hottest June, after the hottest May in 125 years of record keeping — the better thermophilic bacteria, amoebas and parasites like it. The Florida peninsula provides a disturbing preview of the kind of creepy-crawly climate-change horrors that will plague America’s future. I do mean horrors. Already, Florida’s...

I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anaesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. 'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me... 'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If...

PHILADELPHIA, PA—Speaking to a packed 30-seat arena, Bill Clinton remarked on Jeffrey Epstein's recent passing, saying that Epstein's cause of death "really depends on what your definition of 'suicide' is." "Did Epstein commit suicide?" asked an attendee at the event. A wide-eyed Clinton shrugged his shoulders. "I mean, it really depends on what your definition of suicide is, heh." An awkward silence ensued. Bill turned to look at Hillary for support, but she just glared at him and ran her finger across her throat, a metaphor that means "death." He went on, "Heh, I mean, well, we've got to define...

Shooter Walks Free As Police Tackle, Arrest AR-15 August 12th, 2019 LOS ANGELES, CA—There was an attempted shooting earlier today but luckily, the police were close by. They managed to tackle the shooter's AR-15 to the floor. They pinned it to the ground and kicked it a few times for good measure, though it did not appear to be resisting arrest. Bewildered, the shooter shrugged and slowly backed away. "Honestly I was kinda hoping to make a name for myself," he told reporters later. "But they just blamed the gun. So... well, I guess I won't be famous after all."...

Bryon Widner by name, became a skinhead at the age of 14, and he spent 16 years involved with racist organizations in the midwest. He earned the nickname of “pit bull”, and went on to co-found Vinlanders Social Club, a white power group in Indiana. In 2005, Widner married Julie Larsen and a year later, the couple had a son. The responsibilities of fatherhood gave Widner the desire to reform and leave the racist movement, a desire shared by his new wife. Widner has the following words of advice for you

Charles Darwin has apparently repented for his landmark theory of evolution — according to a Russian Orthodox priest who says he recently spoke with the famed British naturalist. Darwin theorized that modern humans are descended from apes in his 1871 book “The Descent of Man.” His writings formed the foundations of modern-day evolutionary biology, a school of thought that roiled religious leaders and still has opponents in the church today. “I am not a fan of his monkey theory, so as a priest, I was interested in talking to him,” said Artemy Vladimirov, an archpriest at Moscow’s Alekseyevsky Stavropegial Female...

NEW YORK, NY—In an effort to improve the newspaper's ability to communicate the truths that its readers want to hear, The New York Times announced Tuesday its new fact-checking process: running all facts and headlines by an angry mob of liberal protesters before going to print. Every fact and headline will be meticulously checked by a group of angry leftists before it's approved for publication. "The Times has become known for bringing you all the news that's fit to print as long as it doesn't challenge a leftist worldview in any way," said New York Times executive editor Dean Baquet....

NEW YORK, NY—A protester yelling into a megaphone on International Women’s Day suddenly realized she was reinforcing the “oppressive and harmful” social construct of gender by promoting a day that implies gender is inherently meaningful, sources confirmed Wednesday. Midway through screaming the phrase “Down with the patriarchy!” into the loudspeaker, the woman suddenly stopped and thought about how her presence at the protest suggested that the concept of womanhood represented something more significant than an arbitrary social construct foisted upon females. “Wait a minute, think about what we’re suggesting here,” the woman said to her fellow demonstrators as she lowered...

What does a yellow light mean? Sorry, watching Mueller today reminded me so much of this. He talked and acted just like Jim Ignatowski

This is feckin BRILLIANT and vurra FUNNEH https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPft9ZKsTfU

It's rather obvious, Mr. Mueller, that you did not write the so-called Mueller Report. In fact, it's painfully obvious that you don't even know what's in the Mueller Report. Now we're wondering if you even conducted the investigation. In fact was any real investigation conducted at all? Isn't it true. Mr. Mueller, that the Mueller Report was actually written by Fusion GPS and paid for by Hillary Clinton and the DNC?

Cats are known to possess all kinds of talents. They are great at hunting, excellent at manipulating humans to get treats, and apparently, they are amazing actors. Well, at least some of them. Meet Lizzy who goes under the stage name, Owl Kitty - the newest Instagram sensation. Owl Kitty is going viral for her amazing performances in nothing else but famous Hollywood movies. How does she do that? As it turns out, her cat-dad Thibault (Tibo) Charroppin is a talented video editor who works hard to make everyone see his adorable cat for the true star she is. And...

The Amazon pullout of Seattle continues. The corporate giant announced on Tuesday that it is going to build a 43-story tower in Bellevue. It will be Amazon’s tallest building anywhere in the world, and it will be the tallest building in Bellevue, which has more than a few skyscrapers. Several thousand employees will be able to work there. So it looks like this is another part in the saga of Amazon leaving Seattle. All of this is because we have a city council and a mayor who have gone fanatic about socialism. They keep pushing anti-business policies. What this means...

David Attenborough takes us on a fascinating journey through one of Earth's slimiest landscapes: The Swamp.

The comic magazine's ability to rib culture, politics, and business shaped the boomer mentality, and we should be grateful.The comics community is abuzz with the news that Mad magazine will, after two more issues, cease publication of original material and abandon newsstand distribution, becoming a reprint title available only in comic book shops (with the exception, Hollywood Reporter reports, of one special issue a year of new content). Mad began life as a comic book in 1952, the brainchild of then-obscure New York cartoonist Harvey Kurtzman, published by William Gaines' E.C. Comics. Through his work in Mad's formative years and...

Humorist/satirist Stan Freberg produced this wonderful Broadway musical-style album in 1961 presenting an alternate version of early American history. Part 1: Overture Part 2: Columbus Discovers America (and Indians discover Columbus) Part 3: Pilgrim's Progress (A candidate panders for the Indian vote) Part 4: The Thanksgiving Story (Why the turkey isn't our national bird) Part 5: The Sale of Manhattan ($24 worth of junk jewelry) Part 6: The Boston Tea Party (Oops!) Part 7: Declaration of Independence (Franklin, the cautious conservative businessman) Part 8: Betsy Ross and the Flag (Why the flag has stars instead of polka dots) Part 9:...

Willie Nelson - She's Not For You (1965)

"Some people say that, maybe I'm not an American citizen. Some people say, 'Ah, he has a forged birth certificate!' "Well, first of all, it's true. I'm not American. I was not born in Hawaii. I wasn't born in the United States of America. I come from Kenya. "So I think people saw my election as ... as proof... as testimony that our society has continued to become more and more enlightened. --- "Come together around a set of shared ideas. "We are still a place where anybody has a chance to make it... through misleading and dishonest practices,...

Mosque Burned By Taliban Bombing Wednesday, June 26, 2019 Gardiz (BNA) A mosque was burned by Taliban bombing in Paktia province last night. Assailants stormed on a mosque in Doulatzai region, Gardiz city and burned the mosque. A security source in south of the country told BNA, the attackers escaped after blasting the mosque. However a witness of the event said, Taliban were make the bombs in the mosque, which one of the bombs exploded and burned the mosque. In this fire, dozens volumes of Holly Quran and books in the field of Islamic sciences have been burned. T. Yarzada