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Keyword: humor

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  • Julian Assange trolls Hillary on Twitter

    02/19/2018 5:10:33 PM PST · by MNDude · 27 replies
    @HillaryClinton Happy birthday to this future president.
  • High School Math Teacher Trapped in Love Isosceles

    02/17/2018 4:06:29 PM PST · by nickcarraway · 47 replies
    CBC ^ | Sophie Kohn
    Steve Kenilworth sighs as he flops down on the couch in the staff room at Rick Astley High School, his Grade 8 math classes finally done for the day. "I'm grateful to have such a full workload this semester because it really keeps my mind off…my…my situation," he shares in a sternly hushed tone as both of his eyes scan the room. Kenilworth explains that several months ago, much to his shock, biology teacher Samantha Young confessed that she has romantic feelings for him. Meanwhile, however, Kenilworth has been helplessly in love with English teacher Dana Freeman for a number...
  • Day 6 Olympic Jazz- Kvedtching, Shaun, Mikala and Figure Skating!!

    02/13/2018 5:04:05 PM PST · by blu · 20 replies
    Half Pipe Snowboarding, Michala finally gets out of that tub of ice water, some short track skating and PAIRS SHORT PROGRAM figure skating.
  • Vanity: The Secret Budget-Balancing Equations of Congress

    02/12/2018 6:42:26 AM PST · by fruser1 · 6 replies
    12 Feb 2018 | self
  • Southern Poverty Law Center Adds Itself To List Of Hate Groups-SATIRE

    02/07/2018 2:14:50 PM PST · by fungoking · 9 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | 2/7/18 | Staff
    MONTGOMERY, AL—In an update Wednesday to its Hatewatch blog, the Southern Poverty Law Center announced the newest addition to its authoritative list of hate groups: the Southern Poverty Law Center. “We have identified an organization with a clear history of rank intolerance toward faith communities based solely upon their sincerely held religious convictions,” the statement reads. “This organization has encouraged ostracism and threats toward people, politicians, and businesses that do not adhere to its rigid progressive agenda. It has existed and operated right under our noses for years. It is known as the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC).” The statement...
  • Adam Schiff was not punked - is trying to make 1 million selling naked Trump photos on Ebay

    02/06/2018 10:26:32 PM PST · by doug from upland · 26 replies
    twitter/ebay ^ | 2-6-18 | dfu
  • Woman Makes $13 A Day Selling Pet Rocks...Robert Downey Jr. Made Millions For ‘Spider-Man’-SATIRE

    02/02/2018 6:36:39 AM PST · by fungoking · 13 replies
    The Babylon Bee ^ | Staff1/12/18
    O. EM. GOSH. It’s 2018, and inequality is still a HUGE problem, even in a progressive utopia like Hollywood. Case in point: this woman’s name is Xayley Briers. She spends forty-five minutes a day running her Etsy storefront selling pet rocks. Do you know how much she makes? About $13 a day. Pretty sad, right? Well, it gets worse. While Briers works her butt off selling and shipping pet rocks all over the country for almost an hour each day, Hollywood A-lister and cisgendered white male Robert Downey Jr. made around $15 MILLION for his work in mega blockbuster Spider-Man...
  • A New Google Doc of Media Men

    01/30/2018 9:48:57 PM PST · by nickcarraway · 4 replies
    New York Magazine ^ | JANUARY 29, 2018 | Sarah Miller
    Once the xxxxy media men list was made public, many asked, “Where will we draw the line? Who will be next? Will there be another list??” It appears there is. The mild-mannered men in media list has now been revealed. At first glance, you might wonder, “Do these missteps really rise to the level of civil or criminal offenses?” If that’s your reaction, then you’re missing the point. My intention is merely to begin a conversation about men who wear thin belts and brag about their low-residency MFA programs. From there, the healing can perhaps begin. Mild-Mannered Men in Media...
  • New IRS 1040 Form [satire]

    01/29/2018 11:40:25 AM PST · by markomalley · 4 replies
    Twitter ^ | 1/29/18 | vanity
    In light of complaints surrounding tax reform, the IRS has published an updated Form 1040. Please ensure you file using the following:
  • Russia bans historical comedy Death of Stalin for 'extremist' content

    01/24/2018 2:05:54 AM PST · by Krosan · 6 replies
    The Telegraph ^ | 23 JANUARY 2018 | Our Foreign Staff
    Russia's culture ministry on Tuesday withdrew permission for the release of British film The Death of Stalin later this week after officials and top arts figures labelled it offensive and "extremist". Armando Iannucci's comedy, which had a world premiere in September, takes a satirical look at the power scramble after Stalin's 1953 death and includes actors playing historical figures such as World War II commander Marshal Georgy Zhukov, Nikita Kruschev and Vyacheslav Molotov. "The distribution certificate for the film 'The Death of Stalin' has been withdrawn," a spokeswoman for the culture ministry told AFP. The ministry said the film's release...
  • If (fill the blank) You might be deploying to a Sh!t Hole.

    01/22/2018 7:26:58 AM PST · by artichokegrower · 18 replies
    Gun Free Zone ^ | January 15, 2018 | Miguel.GFZ
    1. If your boss tells you to update your Gamma Globulin, Yellow Fever, Malaria, Dysentery, Tetanus and other fun immunizations- You might be deploying to a Sh!t Hole.
  • Kids...Gotta Love 'em

    01/19/2018 3:40:56 PM PST · by ExGeeEye · 20 replies
    My little cousin | Now | Me
    My 8 year old cousin is sitting across the living room from me, playing a game on a tablet which apparently involve animated balls going through a maze of some sort. He's mildly autistic, and comments to himself on the game's progress, usually unintelligibly. He just said... "Oh no, my balls are trapped!"
  • The Beatles sing about Star Wars [satire]

    01/14/2018 2:32:36 AM PST · by grundle · 1 replies
    wordpress ^ | January 14, 2018 | Dan from Squirrel Hill
    The Beatles sing about Star Wars The Beatles perform their critically acclaimed album Princess Leia’s Stolen Death Star Plans.The first two videos:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYD3QtyEGGM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhFyX1IkjAMComplete playlist:https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL8s6sSjUyaxUk3mCUqiNuJiMNxs9QdthO
  • WEEK AT THE GYM: ONE MAN'S STORY

    01/11/2018 6:38:24 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 53 replies
    email from a friend | 01/11/2018 | unknown
    Dear Diary. For my sixty fifth birthday this year, my wife (the dear) purchased a week of personal training at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since playing on my college tennis team 45 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try. I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My wife seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The...
  • Church Chuckles

    01/10/2018 2:47:24 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 18 replies
    email from a friend | 01/10/2018 | unknown
    Why Go to Church? One Sunday morning, a mother went in to wake her son and tell him it was time to get ready for church, to which he replied, "I'm not going." "Why not?" she asked.  "I'll give you two good reasons," he said. "One, they don't like me, and two, I don't like them."  His mother replied, "I'll give you two good reasons why you SHOULD go to church: One, you're 59 years old, and two you're the pastor!" The Picnic  - A Jewish Rabbi and a Catholic Priest met at the town's annual 4th of July picnic. ...
  • An Irish Thursday

    01/04/2018 3:35:50 AM PST · by sodpoodle · 5 replies
    email from a friend | 01/04/2018 | unknown
    After 10 years, the wife starts to think their kid looks kinda strange so she decides to do a DNA test. She finds out that the kid is actually from completely different parents.   Wife: Honey, I have something very serious to tell you. Husband: What's up? Wife: According to DNA test results, this is not our kid... Husband: Well you don't remember, do you??? When we were leaving the hospital, you noticed that our baby had pooped, then you said: "Please go change the baby, I'll wait for you here." So I went inside, got a clean one and left the dirty...
  • GAME OVER: NFL CANCELS ‘Sunday Night Football’ on New Year's Eve

    12/27/2017 9:05:43 AM PST · by xzins · 275 replies
    Hannity.com ^ | 27 Dec 17 | Hannity.com Staff
    The embattled National Football League announced its decision to cancel this week’s edition of ‘Sunday Night Football’ on Tuesday; hoping to avoid a ratings bloodbath as a less-than-stellar line-up and New Year’s Eve festivities would have caused the NFL to reach embarrassing new lows. The league opted to call-off the game before announcing which teams were scheduled to compete, adding the match-up wouldn’t have playoff implications and would likely cost the already troubled organization millions of dollars. “We felt that both from a competitive standpoint and from a fan perspective, the most fair thing to do is to schedule all...
  • XKCD "Phone Security" [silly]

    12/27/2017 9:01:02 AM PST · by Dr. Sivana · 8 replies
    xkcd.com ^ | 12/27/2017 | Randall Munroe
    Just a little break from the regular politics and economics.
  • Look! A Cool Post! (Friday Humor, cuz winning is funny)

    12/20/2017 4:34:04 PM PST · by Vendome · 21 replies
    Vanity | 12/20/2017 | Vendome
  • DO NOT EVER DO THIS!

    12/23/2017 8:20:36 PM PST · by Rebelbase · 21 replies
    twitter and reposts ^ | 12/2317 | Dan Kaszeta
    Embedded video at link. Cringe worthy. But funny as hell.