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Keyword: humor

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  • FReeper Canteen ~ Just Hangin' Cafe ~ 9 October 2015

    10/08/2015 5:55:12 PM PDT · by beachn4fun · 76 replies
    October 8, 2015 | Canteen Crew
    FR CANTEEN MISSION STATEMENT Showing support and boosting the morale of our military and our allied military and the family members of the above.Honoring those who have served before. FReeper Canteen Just Hangin' Cafe Come on in, we're open Need a place just to hang out? This is it. We serve coffee, tea, conversation and music. Our AWESOME military, our AWESOME allies, and their families are welcomed and honored here. No worries in the FReeper Canteen Just Hangin' Cafe. Grab a cup and start a conversation. You never know who you might meet in the Cafe. Glad you could...
  • BUNGLING SURGEON BEN CARSON LEFT SPONGE IN PATIENT’S BRAIN!

    10/07/2015 4:56:11 PM PDT · by entropy12 · 82 replies
    National Enquirer ^ | October 7, 2015 | Sharon Churcher
    Judging by White House wannabe Ben Carson’s track record as a neurosurgeon, his presidential campaign should be declared dead on arrival! In a bombshell investigation into his medical career, The National ENQUIRER has exclusively learned the now retired doc allegedly butchered one patient’s brain — and EVEN left a sponge in another’s skull! According to at least six malpractice lawsuits against Carson obtained by The ENQUIRER, the Republican candidate allegedly rushed patients into surgery, and brandished a scalpel like a meat cleaver!
  • Bloodbath: ‘Los Angeles Times’ To Cut 10% of Staff

    10/05/2015 12:18:35 PM PDT · by Rockitz · 71 replies
    Breitbart.com ^ | 5 Oct 2015 | John Nolte
    While it may be impossible to believe that an upstanding newspaper like The Los Angeles Times, a trusted and beloved publication that describes half-black men as “white supremacists,” is having financial troubles, the fact is that a bloodbath involving at least 10% of newsroom staffers is underway. The Los Angeles Times staff will be reduced from 500 to around 450, and buyouts are being offered, but not really. There’s some severance and an additional amount that equals a week’s pay for every year of employment. This sounds like less of a buyout than a small incentive to avoid being laid...
  • NATO denounces Russian incursion into Turkish air space

    10/05/2015 9:59:40 AM PDT · by Navy Patriot · 11 replies
    Reuters ^ | October 5, 2015 | AYLA JEAN YACKLEY AND HUMEYRA PAMUK
    The United States and its NATO allies denounced Russia on Monday for violating Turkish air space along the frontier with Syria, and Ankara threatened to respond if provoked again, raising the prospect of direct confrontation between the Cold War enemies. NATO held an emergency meeting of ambassadors of its 28 member states to respond to what Secretary-General Jens Stoltenberg called "unacceptable violations of Turkish air space" after Turkey said a Russian jet had crossed its frontier. NATO members "strongly protest" and "condemn" incursions into Turkish and NATO territory, the alliance said. "Allies also note the extreme danger of such irresponsible...
  • Mold whine: Soylent superfood shipments stopped by spore scare (Liquid goop cleanup in Aisle 3)

    10/02/2015 10:24:24 PM PDT · by dayglored · 12 replies
    The Register ^ | Oct 3, 2015 | Iain Thomson
    Soylent, which produces liquid food for techies who hate chewing, has stopped shipping its gloop after some of it was contaminated with mold. The firm started flogging version 2.0 of its formula in August, and has produced 400,000 bottles of the strange substance. It has since learned that 11 of the bottles had mold inside or on the outside by the time they reached customers. That's a tiny proportion, however on Friday the biz confirmed it's halting operations. "During our record review process we did discover that the conveyor guardrail settings were not optimized, causing some bottles to move erratically...
  • Poll results: Are there too many illegal aliens in the United States?

    09/26/2015 5:08:25 PM PDT · by LibWhacker · 7 replies
  • Bananas- movie- Mad Dictator Scene

    09/21/2015 10:44:20 AM PDT · by John S Mosby · 15 replies
    You Tub-e ^ | 10/4/2011 | Bananas-the movie
    New info from Havana and the Pope's visit. New "freedoms" celebrated... and monitored as in every good socialist/marxist dictatorship. Have a laugh in the face of the serious happenings. "The official language of San Marcos (Cuba), will be Swedish. All citizens will be required to change their underwear on the 1/2 hour.....underwear to be worn on the outside, so we can check. Also, all children under 16 years old, are now... 16 years old". From the movie (woody allen's- his last worthwhile funny film from long ago-- considering what a perv he is) "Bananas"- appropriate with the shiite going on...
  • Scientists Urge President to Prosecute Global Warming Skeptics [semi-satire]

    09/19/2015 12:09:01 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 16 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 19 Sep 2015 | John Semmens
    A gaggle of university climatologists have written to President Obama and Attorney General Loretta Lynch urging them to prosecute people who continue to contradict the "scientific consensus" on climate change. Sen. Sheldon Whitehouse (D-RI) immediately endorsed the idea as "essential to our survival as a planet." "The freedom of people able to contradict the accepted science impedes the government from taking the steps necessary to combat dangerous climate change," Whitehouse contended. Paraphrasing a famous observation made by Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes for justifying suppression of free speech, the Senator averred that "allowing a person to deny the truth...
  • [Humor] All 128 Division I Colleges Ranked by Everything Other Than Sports (Also, Sports)

    09/19/2015 11:08:18 AM PDT · by re_nortex · 34 replies
    ThrillList ^ | 9/19/2015 | Matt Lynch and Kevin Alexander
    Here's one highlight from the list: SMU likes to think of itself as the Duke of the Southwest. And it is, in that half the students are really good-looking people from the Northeast who didn’t get into Duke. But seriously, it’s an astonishingly good-looking student body, even if most of the dudes should be punched in the hair for Dave Matthews concert cuts they’ll be trimming the moment they waltz into their finance job.
  • 2015 Ig Nobel prizes: dinosaur-like chickens and bee-stings to the penis

    09/19/2015 9:45:57 AM PDT · by JimSEA · 5 replies
    Guardian ^ | 9/17/2015 | Alan Yuthas
    A man stung dozens of times by bees, mathematicians who wanted to know whether a man could physically be able to sire 600 sons, and chemists who unboiled an egg were honoured on Thursday night with one of science’s most storied awards, the Ig Nobel prize. Professors, researchers, students and actual Nobel laureates from around the world gathered at Harvard University at the 25th First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony, the absurdist celebration of science that “makes you laugh, then think”. Entomologist Justin Schmidt and Cornell researcher Michael Smith jointly won for their painstaking experiments charting how painful insect stings...
  • Bumper Sticker Of The Day…

    09/05/2015 3:51:17 AM PDT · by smoothsailing · 15 replies
    The Conservative Treehouse ^ | 9-4-2015 | Patriot Dreamer
    Bumper Sticker Of The Day… Posted on September 4, 2015 by Patriot Dreamer H/T WeeWeed
  • don’t worry about people

    09/04/2015 6:31:54 PM PDT · by HarleyLady27 · 24 replies
    A lady has decided for giving herself a special treat on her Seventeenth birthday by staying overnight in a very expensive & magnificent hotel. Next morning, The Desk clerk handed her a bill of $250. She insisted to know about Highly charged bill "I accept it's a good hotel, but the rooms aren't worth $250..00 for just staying for one night - I didn't even have breakfast!" The Desk clerk told her that Two-Hundred-and-Fifty Dollars is the 'standard rate,' and breakfast had been included had she wanted it. She insisted on Communicating to the Manager. The Manager appeared and, informed...
  • Illinois Lottery winners receive IOU amid lack of budget

    08/31/2015 7:34:39 AM PDT · by MarvinStinson · 55 replies
    CNBC ^ | 8/31/2015 | Fred Imbert
    Danny Chasteen and his girlfriend, Susan Rick, thought they had gotten their big break last month when Chasteen won $250,000 from the Illinois Lottery. Instead, they got an IOU. The Chicago Tribune reported that disbursements of Illinois Lottery winnings of more than $25,000 have been halted because the state doesn't have a budget. "For the first time, we were finally gonna get a break," Rick said. "And now the Illinois Lottery has kind of messed everything up." Under state law, checks for such winnings must be cut by the state comptroller's office and, since lawmakers have yet to approve a...
  • Cheer up Malia, you're on vacation! First Daughter looks unimpressed while( Secret Lives of the De

    As reputation would have it, the Democrat elite, especially those fortunate enough to have "won life's lottery" and lived in the White House, have an enviable life. They attend a round of galas, cultural events, and black-tie soirees most of us have never even heard of; their name alone guarantees admission. And if the connections are not enough, there is the travel : Hawaii, exotic Africa, Martha's Vineyard -- none of this Crawford, Texas as under President Bush. But is it really all nothing but glamour? Consider the next two photos, taken tonight from The Drudge Report: one of the...
  • Fakery! Russia Has Published Books I Didn’t Write!

    08/20/2015 7:32:12 AM PDT · by Krosan · 13 replies
    The Daily Beast ^ | 08.20.15 | Edward Lucas
    Russia Has Published Books I Didn’t Write! A dodgy imprint has compiled old material by several U.S. and British analysts, without their permission. The aim is pro-Putin spin. A new foreign-language edition is normally cause for celebration in an author’s household. But in this case the news that two books have been published under my name by the Moscow publishing house “Algoritm” has prompted puzzlement mixed with consternation. One of them is called "How the West Lost to Putin". The other is "With Putin or without him: what awaits Russia in the next 10 years". I had no idea about...
  • Joke "O" the Day

    08/18/2015 8:32:21 AM PDT · by US Navy Vet · 10 replies
    Lucianne.com ^ | 18 Aug 2015
    Stolen from Lucianne.com
  • Joke for the day

    08/17/2015 10:19:36 AM PDT · by US Navy Vet · 13 replies
    Lucianne.com ^ | 17 Aug 2015
    Stolen from Lucianne.com
  • Litany for the conversion of internet thugs

    08/14/2015 11:10:46 AM PDT · by grey_whiskers · 9 replies
    Fr. Z's Blog ^ | (unknown) | Father Zuhlsdorf
    A work in progress. I am willing to take some intelligent suggestions and additions. Litany for the conversion of internet thugs. (private use only, and when truly irritated, and when the alternative is foul language) Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy. Lord, have mercy. Christ, hear us. Christ, graciously hear us. God, the Father of Heaven, have mercy on us. God, the Son, Redeemer of the World, have mercy on us. God, the Holy Ghost, have mercy on us. Holy Trinity, one God, have mercy on us. Lest internet thugs be eternally tormented by all the fiends of hell, convert...
  • Behind the scenes at Chappaqua (and Hillary's server and emails): Klintonerdämmerung (humor)

    08/14/2015 9:47:52 AM PDT · by Beave Meister · 11 replies
    You Tube ^ | 8/11/2015 | Tim Donovan
    Behind the scenes at Chappaqua and Hillary and her team destroying all her servers,email and other evidence. This has taken the place of Hitler's rant in the bunker. It's short and pretty funny,.Unfortunately, it's probably all true.
  • FReeper Canteen ~ Just Hangin' Cafe ~ 14 August 2015

    08/13/2015 5:57:51 PM PDT · by beachn4fun · 111 replies
    August 13, 2015 | Canteen Crew
    FR CANTEEN MISSION STATEMENT Showing support and boosting the morale of our military and our allied military and the family members of the above.Honoring those who have served before. FReeper Canteen Just Hangin' Cafe Come on in, we're open Need a place just to hang out? This is it. It's casual FRiday here at the Canteen. Pull up a seat and relax. We serve coffee, tea, conversation and music. Our AWESOME military, our AWESOME allies, and their families are welcomed and honored here. No worries in the FReeper Canteen Just Hangin' Cafe. Grab a cup or a glass, and...