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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • Obama Eyes Emancipation Proclamation as Model for Amnesty Executive Order

    08/09/2014 8:39:18 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 16 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 Aug 2014 | John Semmens
    Insiders say that President Obama will use President Lincoln's Emancipation Proclamation as the model for his anticipated Executive Order granting amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants. In 1862 Lincoln declared that all slaves in territory held by the Rebels were "forever free." He justified it as a wartime necessity. Those close to Obama say he views the parallels as "striking." "As he sees it," says an off-the-record source, "the vast majority of the illegal immigrants reside in states that are hostile to the Administration?at war with his efforts to transform the nation. Thus, as Commander-in-Chief he believes it is his...
  • From Our COLD, DEAD HANDS!

    08/09/2014 6:10:31 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 3 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 09 August 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    A quick jaunt around the best of the right-wingtip of the blog-o-sphere  this week (while the world collapses around us) at Reaganite Republican...
  • #ISIS Hashtag Triggers #ObamaForeignPolicyInThreeWords Contest

    08/09/2014 5:46:02 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 31 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-9-2014 | MOTUS
    Uh oh. Looks like ISIS is taunting Big Guy: “I say to America, that the Islamic Caliphate has been established, and we will not stop,” Abu Mosa told Vice. “Don’t be cowards and attack us with drones. Instead send your soldiers, the ones we humiliated in Iraq.”“We will humiliate them everywhere, God willing, and we will raise the flag of Allah in the White House,” he continued. That’s not smart, I guess they don’t know how truly thin-skinned he is. And how much he hates it when his vacation is interrupted.So watch out ISIS, Big Guy is keeping his eye...
  • Judge Denies Plaintiff Access to IRS Emails

    08/08/2014 4:10:43 PM PDT · by John Semmens · 10 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 Aug 2014 | John Semmens
    The quest of those victimized by the IRS’s discriminatory treatment of conservative groups hit a brick wall when U.S. District Court Judge Reggie Walton ruled that the plaintiffs failed to prove that denial of access to the emails would result in “irreparable” harm. “True the Vote,” a conservative organization dedicated to combating vote fraud, had requested that a forensic expert of the court’s choosing attempt to recover the “lost” emails of IRS official Lois Lerner. Lerner has refused to testify to Congress on the grounds that such testimony would be “self incriminating.” Nonetheless, Judge Walton characterized the plaintiff’s suspicions as...
  • If CNN says Hong Kong’s in Brazil, it must be so!

    08/08/2014 1:52:38 PM PDT · by Sir Napsalot · 22 replies
    Media Equalizer ^ | 8-8-2014 | Brian Maloney
    Hey kids, don’t get your geography lessons from CNN! That is, unless you think it’s possible to convince your teacher that Hong Kong has been relocated to Brazil. Hey, with the state of our public skools these days, it might be possible. What was this about hornets? We were distracted. On the other hand, maybe Lost was real and the island can be moved! Thanks to Zero Hedge for the catch.
  • Short Books!

    08/08/2014 11:39:10 AM PDT · by NKP_Vet · 29 replies
    Short Books!! These books hold the world record for the shortest stories, and you must have a pretty good long term memory and be well informed to fully appreciate the humor. Just remember some of these are very, very short books. ____________________________________________ THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY COUNTRY By Jane Fonda, Cindy Sheehan & Michelle Obama Illustrated by Michael Moore Foreword by George Soros ________________________________________ MY CHRISTIAN ACCOMPLISHMENTS & HOW I HELPED AFTER KATRINA By "The Rev Jesse Jackson" & "The Rev Al Sharpton" ______________________________________ THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL By Hillary Clinton _________________ Sequel: THINGS I LOVE ABOUT HILLARY...
  • TGIF Toonz

    08/08/2014 7:42:39 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 4 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 08 August 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    More at Reaganite Republican...
  • Your Ethics Chip is Now Ready for Installation

    08/08/2014 6:01:13 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-8-2104 | MOTUS
    Just a few things to wrap up before packing for the Vineyards: President Barack Obama stepped in front of the cameras on Thursday to utter words he hoped he would never say as commander in chief."I've therefore authorized targeted airstrikes if necessary to help forces in Iraq," Mr. Obama said in a statement from the White House. "Today America is coming to help." That would be as opposed to the last time we came, under George W. Bush, to kill people and break things and…Halliburton!And don’t think for a minute that this decision was an easy one for Val Jar....
  • Hypocrisy Over Gaza (Pat Condell Slams progressive support for Hamas)

    08/07/2014 4:01:05 PM PDT · by sinsofsolarempirefan · 1 replies
    Youtube ^ | 6th August 2014 | Pat Condell
    See Link
  • Bye-bye American Pie! It’s been a Sweet Ride.

    08/07/2014 8:06:58 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 13 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-7-2014 | MOTUS
    Perhaps this explains that “you’re dead to me” look in Big Guy’s eyes while toasting his guests at Tuesday’s State dinner: To the dictators! Long may we not “just be standing around.” Or if that’s not it, maybe it’s because of this: A new Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll found that despite the steady pace of hiring in recent months, 76% of adults lack confidence that their children's generation will have a better life than they do—an all-time high. Some 71% of adults think the country is on the wrong track, a leap of 8 points from a June survey,...
  • Andrew Klavan: Putin's Secret Message to Obama (video)

    08/07/2014 4:26:05 AM PDT · by servo1969 · 4 replies
    TruthRevolt.org ^ | 8-7-2014 | Andrew Klaven
    Putin's Secret Message to ObamaI’m Andrew Klavan and this is the Revolting Truth. Ever since President Obama took office, he’s been making friendly overtures to the Russians, trying to “press the reset button” in relations between our two countries. In 2012, the president was even caught on an open mike promising he’d have more “flexibility” to cave in to Russian demands after he was re-elected. Russian President Vladimir Putin has responded warmly to Obama’s gestures by warmly cheating on our arms treaties, warmly supporting our enemies in Syria, warmly annexing Crimea, and warmly abetting the destruction of a Malaysian airliner...
  • …In which we continue to fall down the rabbit hole, darkly

    08/06/2014 5:42:40 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 4 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-6-2014 | MOTUS
     Because there was no party to mark the 53rd year of Big Guy’s immaculation, Raj and I ordered out. Don’t you hate it when you finish up your Kung Pao Chicken and Moo Shu Pork and find this inside your fortune cookie?And I think my “Lucky Numbers” look highly suspect as well.Especially with you-know-what still floating around:I’ve heard all the experts, including Greg Gutfeld, tell us why we shouldn’t panic over Ebola in America, butt I should point out that these are the same experts who told us we should panic over Bird Flu, Swine Flu and SARS, which there...
  • Hump-Day Humor

    08/06/2014 3:40:22 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 3 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 06 August 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    More at Reaganite Republican...
  • Americans Demand Obama Investigate Ebola [Satire]

    08/05/2014 5:23:48 PM PDT · by WXRGina · 8 replies
    World News Bureau ^ | August 5, 2014 | Scooter Van Neuter
    PHOENIX, Arizona (WNB) - Noted philanthropist Scooter Van Neuter on Tuesday announced the formation of an organization calling for President Obama to personally investigate the growing Ebola virus epidemic. The group, Americans For Obama Ebola (AFOE) demands the President visit the West African country of Sierra Leone in order to personally assess the situation. "While the President spends his time golfing and figuring out how to import more government-dependent welfare parasites, the world is being threatened with an epidemic of unimaginable proportions. We demand President Obama personally visit hospitals in West Africa to see for himself the toll this disease...
  • Open Thread Tuesday: Ebola in America

    08/05/2014 6:25:55 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 3 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-5-2014 | MOTUS
    Question – Ebola:Capitalist Pig Plot (CPP)?Or Big Guy’s Secret Plan to Destroy America? (SPTDA).And what does all of this have to do with BHO’s most recent Executive Order that allows for the apprehension, detention, and/or conditional release of individuals with certain severe acute respiratory diseases, not including influenza?  (Of course, we will determine whether it’s “influenza” or not.)Inquiring minds want to know.Tell us what you think, and remember: your vote counts – every time you vote, just like in Chicgo.Posted from: Michelle Obama’s Mirror 
  • Massachusetts Cracks Down on Pro-Life Free Speech [SATIRE]

    08/04/2014 10:35:04 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 10 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 2 August 2014 | John Semmens
    Determined to overcome a recent 9-0 US Supreme Court ruling against the state’s “buffer zones” surrounding abortion clinics, the Massachusetts Legislature enacted a new, more severe buffer zone statute. The penalty for violating the new buffer zone is a fine of up to $50,000 and incarceration of up to three years in jail. Governor Deval Patrick (D) praised “the courage of our legislators who have stood up against judicial tyranny. The right to an abortion is a human right. Women seeking to exercise this right should not be impeded by the unwanted messages of its opponents assaulting their ears on...
  • New Airline Offering Illegal Immigrants a Free Ride...

    08/04/2014 9:09:06 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 10 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 04 August 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    And you haven't heard the funny part yet-  you're paying for it h/t Roberto
  • CIA Strikes Penitent Pose

    08/04/2014 6:29:31 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 5 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 2 August 2014 | John Semmens
    With the escape route of deniability closed, CIA Director John Brennan grudgingly apologized to Senate intelligence committee leaders for his Agency’s covert perusal of their correspondence. “Yeah, we’re sorry,” Brennan growled. “But I still don’t see what the big deal is. We spy on everyone. Why should Senators be exempt from our efforts to protect national security? Are they somehow better than the average Americans they supposedly represent?” “Is it really implausible that Senators having access to classified information might pose a significant security risk?” Brennan continued. “I could argue that the need to keep an eye on what they...
  • “Not One Shred of Irony”

    08/04/2014 6:01:21 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 8-4-2014 | MOTUS
    While we wait to find out if Ebola is God’s way of saying “Shut the D*** Borders!” let us ponder this, via HuffPo: The White House is making women's empowerment a theme in a Washington African leaders summit next week. Michelle Obama said problems with girls' education often stemmed from traditional "attitudes and beliefs" that exist even in the United States and lead to issues such as the gender pay gap and an underrepresentation of women in leadership. She said men worldwide needed to "look into their hearts and souls and ask if they truly view women as their equals."Or,...
  • Bottom-of-the-Barrel Russian Dating Site Pics

    08/04/2014 3:28:10 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 42 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 04 August 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    Lizbeta Bordenova seeks handsome Moscow dentist -or else More at Reaganite Republican...