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Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) wowed the beltway elite and even Democrats during Saturday's annual Gridiron event, showing why the Ivy Leaguer has confounded and been vilified by many with whom he shares the same intellectual pedigree. The annual D.C. roast is hosted by the exclusive Gridiron Club, which is composed of D.C.'s mainstream and "elite" journalists. Cruz has degrees from Princeton and Harvard, which those in the permanent political class covet, and he can do their social rituals better than they can. Yet Cruz refuses to be co-opted by them politically, instead choosing to be a staunch conservative who represents...

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Freepers wanting to use this list to announce their latest book or a book giveaway, etc. Freepmail me. You got on this list by being intemperate enough to let me know you downloaded one of my novels. If you want off, mail me. If you want on, likewise. BTW, I’m new at this so your suggestions (other than the one about what I should do with my head) are appreciated.

The first round of puns I posted a while back were well received (you can see them here), so here's some more.(h/t to Freeper tacticalogic for #6)

Speaking to a group of “pro-choice” advocates for government-funded abortions, President Obama praised them as “doing God’s work.” In a bid to stem criticism from “pro life” opponents of abortion, Press Secretary Jay Carney suggested that “since God is supposed to be all-powerful, how can the President’s assertion be wrong?” “When a person dies the devoutly religious often say God has called him back to heaven,” Carney recalled. “So, if a doctor sends a fetus back to heaven who’s to say he isn’t doing God’s work? Look at all the suffering that is averted. An unwanted child is spared a...

It’s not that I forgot to turn my clock ahead an hour last night. It’s just that my alarm didn’t work.Being both a techie fan and a bacon lover, you can imagine how thrilled I was when I found out I’d been selected as a beta tester for one of the hottest, cutting edge gadgets ever created: The Oscar Mayer Wake Up & Smell The Bacon App!Butt let me start at the beginning of this amazing odyssey: I first learned about the Bacon App from Lady M who was tapped by Oscar Mayer early on to become a beta tester...

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Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) may have won the straw poll, but runner-up Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) won the biggest endorsement on the final night of the Conservative Political Action Conference. Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin, the closing speaker at the three-day gathering of activists, touted Cruz and urged conservatives to challenge the GOP’s inside-the-beltway establishment. “Thank you Texas because liberty needs a Congress on Cruz control,” Palin told an audience that erupted into raucous cheers. Cruz, who was elected to the Senate after beating Texas Lt. Gov. David Dewhurst — the candidate favored in 2012 by the GOP establishment —...

In rebuttal to President Obama’s assertion that having voters in the Crimea decide whether to be immediately absorbed into Russia or to first declare independence from Ukraine before being absorbed is illegal and “on the wrong side of history,” Russian President Vladimir Putin cited a 20th century precedent in justification. “A plebiscite in which the people of a region decide their own fate is the most democrat way of resolving sovereignty issues,” Putin said. “We are not inventing this method. In 1938 it was used to allow the people of Austria to unite with their fellow ethnic Germans. Why should...

Sorry you couldn’t all have been here for the “Women of Soul” concert on Thursday. Butt good news: you little people can vicariously enjoy the Women of Soul: In Performance at the White House on April 7 on PBS (9 p.m. ET/PT, times may vary).The festivities began in the afternoon with Lady M, some of the Women of Soul, and students from across the country for a workshop called "I'm Every Woman: The History of Women in Soul." And wouldn’t you know it? The one and only time Lady M’s Nickelodeon soul-full get-up might have fit right in…she chose to...

What's going on here? What's the kid checking for, and what is he saying to Obama?I'll post the best/favorites early next week

As the number of seriously ill patients whose access to treatment has been impeded by the Affordable Care Act continues to increase, Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius insists that “the actual number affected represents only a tiny minority of the population.” “No plan can comfortably accommodate every single person,” Sebelius pointed out. “Trade-offs are inevitable. We can’t let ourselves be distracted by the pitiful stories of a handful of unfortunate victims of rare diseases. The vast majority are receiving the coverage we deem essential.” Providing the “vast majority” with contraceptives, mammograms, and sex change surgery while short-changing the...

A satire article with an appropriate measure of truth is going viral on the Internet.   "Connecticut halts plans to round up firearms after finding most cops in the state are on the list" is a satire posted on callthecops.net four days ago on March 4th.    At the bottom of the page, discreetly posted, is this disclaimer: This site is a satire of the current state of Law Enforcement, Fire Fighting and Emergency Medical work. Stories posted here are not real and you should not assume them to have any basis in any real fact. The article was emailed to...

Conservative links/more at Reaganite Republican...

There is little doubt that former IRS official Lois Lerner possesses key information on illegal activities conducted by the Agency. Emails from her account verify that. Yet, on two occasions, Lerner has invoked the Fifth Amendment's guarantee against self-incrimination and refused to testify before Congress. Lerner’s attorney Bill Taylor argues that “it is her only chance if she hopes to come out of this alive. This point was made clear to me when we talked to representatives at the Department of Justice. The Administration has many potent options for taking extreme action against my client. Convincing the DOJ that she...

This is sort of a follow up/companion to 23 memes and graphics that demonstrate how embarassing Obama is compared to Putin.The title alone will really tick off liberals, but they'll never tell you this is wrong. The world never messed with us like this when Bush was president, period.

I had a really good (and much needed) laugh with this one.

The entire reason for Obamacare is to get the uninsured insurance. Now we're seeing those very people aren't taking the bait..

Hey, makes about as much sense as anything else they've been doing since 2009.

Did you know that today is National Day of Un-plugging?Probably not, if you’re reading this.Yes, it’s official: regardless of what Vlad does, we intend to unplug in the Florida Keys as a family this weekend. After a joint appearance of the Wons at a Coral Gables high school to deliver the pre-vacation obligatory speech on the importance of getting an overpriced college education.Besides, that whole Moscow/Kiev situation could stand a little unplugged cooling-off period if you ask me. So even if BO decides he has to return to the Big White so he can pretend to attend National Security meetings,...

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RUSH: Have you seen, ladies and gentlemen, the new Cadillac commercial for their new electric car? (interruption) You haven't? It features the actor Neal McDonough. Do you watch Justified? (interruption) Well, Neal McDonough was in Justified two years ago. He's got this baby-shaped head, blue eyes, short, blond hair. He can play the nicest next-door neighbor or the evilest villain you've ever found. He is the actor in this commercial. The left hates this commercial. There are caustic posts on leftist websites, and even mainstream news sites, Huffing and Puffington Post. They're outraged over the Cadillac ad! If you've seen...

It's not "beyond a shadow of a doubt" status, but most people are reasonably sure the guy on the left (of course) is Vladimir Putin!Truth be told this photo looked really incomplete to me.So below you can see I fixed it! :-)

(The following is satire.) It’s so unfortunate to see the leader of a prominent foreign nation such as Russia’s Vladimir Putin exhibit the same kind of hate and bigotry we’ve seen displayed over the last several years by members of that backward, bitterly racist “Tea Party” group here in the United States. I wish we could just live in a world where a black president was accorded the respect and deference he is due, instead of having to endure such outright defiance from those who see nothing but the color of his skin, and who hold him in utter contempt...

Well that was embarrassing: Big Guy’s controversial selection to head DOJ’s civil rights division, Debo Adegbile, was rejected by the Senate in a stunning defeat. We’re not used to rejection, how did this happen? Why did Dirty Harry let the Debo nomination go to the vote if we didn’t have enough Senators to carry it? As it turns out, it looks like a simple math error: somebody just counted wrong. Harry was assured he had the requisite 51 votes on the floor, with Joey B standing by,just in case. I suppose this sort of thing was bound to happen, what...

WASHINGTON — Confirming suspicions of Americans and Fox News contributors everywhere, Communist-in-Chief Barack Obama announced today that his plans to downsize the Defense Department in size and spending are singularly rooted in a heartfelt desire to allow the terrorists to win. “I’m doing this because I hate America,” Obama told reporters. “Plain and simple.” Indeed, last week, the president unveiled proposals that would shrink the Army to pre-World War II levels, slash a number of costly programs, and roll back some benefits to service members and their families. Speaking today from the White House briefing room, the president assured Americans...

"Hillary Clinton is putting on a little weight.   She'd better be careful...  if she gains 10 more pounds, Bill's going to start hitting on her."   —David Letterman  

As I've stated before, I HATE doing posts like this, but if the morons in charge think America should kid itself they've got another thing coming.If they don't want to be cast as wimps then maybe they should grow a pair...

How 'bout that 30 year old photo of Hillary?!?

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Exclusive new video my massadvj...follow link.

{fsubscribe}Posted a blank of this photo over the weekend, here are 9 of the best/favorite captions people came up with.

US Attorney General Eric Holder urged his state attorney general counterparts “to not let rigid adherence to the prescribed duties of your office force you into enforcing laws with which you disagree. As your state’s top legal official you have a prosecutor’s discretion to decline to enforce such laws.” Holder cited the Obama Administration’s successful refusal to enforce laws it dislikes “as proof it can be done. I’m not saying that there won’t be complaints. There most certainly will be those who try to pressure you to blindly follow your state’s laws. But what can they really do?” The AG...

I posted this picture of an astronomically high price for a bag of fake pennies earlier. It reminded me of this piece by me also involving the penny.

Putin, speaking at a press conference in Moscow on Tuesday, said there was "no need yet" for Russia to exercise its authority, adding that he was not considering the annexation of Crimea and any force used would be a last resort. And besides, even if we get to the “last resort” not only will it be Bush’s fault, it will no doubt be only an “unbelievably small, limited kind of action” that will not necessarily be “an invasion” butt more of an “uncontested arrival,” for a visit of indeterminate length. So before we follow these semantics down the rabbit...

My 28 y/o vegan son was home this weekend and asked if we watched the show "The Miller", we said no. He said that he was watching it at the gym and they made fun of vegans and it hurt his feelings...IT was all I could do to NOT start in on the "See..now it's time you get the to hear it for a while. You want to live it..then suck it up."

I see on the packaging that these are meant for be for educational use. Well, for those who need a math tutor that comes to 3.49 cents for every FAKE penny.What a freakin' joke. It would be cheaper for teachers to just give their students real money to count with.

I just refreshed my Yahoo! homepage, and there is not one story visible on page one about Ukraine.Obviously the journo-list-ers have decided that the story was hurting King Barack I, so poof! no more Ukraine news!Isn't nice we live in a country under the firm hand of our Glorious Leader, the Hindmost, where we don't have to be disturbed by such upsetting stories?

This is brilliant.I normally have a perennial Oscar piece I trot out (here), and in the past I would do agitprop based on the nominees of the year. I didn't do it this year because I paid absolutely positively no attention to that stuff this time around. It just wasn't on my radar.I suspect I'm not alone, the cultural relevance of the season of narcissists engaging in self-congratulation has definitely been waning since I was a child. As long as Hollywood remains a godless, leftist cesspool that's a good thing.

I hate doing posts like this as much as I feel compelled to do them. They can be construed as rooting against our (Democratic) leaders in a foreign crisis, but honestly it's the only kind of commentary that makes sense because they're not giving us anything to root for.Anyway Secretary of State Kerry is going to the region, and YOU decide which is more realistic, the Photoshop below (with a face like John Kerry's I have to clarify that it is a Photoshop job) or Kerry's claim that Russia is invading Ukraine because it is weak and desperate.Really, Mr. Ed? Compared...

I didn’t watch the Oscars last night, butt I hear it was a night of politically correct historic firsts: Matthew McConaughey won Best Actor for his portrayal of a gay rodeo rider in Dallas Buyers Club, Lupita Nyong'o won Best Supporting Actress for her role in 12 Years a Slave, Jared Leto won Best Supporting Actor for his role as a transgendered sidekick in Dallas Buyers Club, Alfonso Cuarón won as the first Mexican Best Director for Gravity, Steve McQueen’s 12 Years a Slave won as the first movie from a black director to win Best Picture…and Big Guy’s “Foreign...

Obama just held an unprecedented late Sunday evening press conference at the White House, to announce that in response to Russian actions in the Ukraine, US athletes would not be allowed to compete in the Sochi Olympics. He also said that he was instructing relevant US agencies to immediately ban the importation of Russian caviar, vodka, and borscht into the US.

Almost...but not really

Claiming that “America’s moms are confused and bewildered by the task of selecting from a wide array of non-standardized options when it comes to feeding their families,” First Lady Michelle Obama made a plea for more rigorous government control over what’s available for purchase. “Reading the labels of multiple alternatives for a single food item is, at best, time consuming,” Michelle complained. “Understanding these labels is also daunting. Is there any mom who can be expected to know how to choose wisely?” The First Lady suggested that “if nutrition experts were to oversee what’s available we could simplify the process...

In Russia, man eat bearRussian armed forces seized control of Ukraine’s Crimean Peninsula on Saturday, as the Russian Parliament granted President Vladimir V. Putin broad authority to use military force in response to the political upheaval in Ukraine that dislodged a Kremlin ally and installed a new, staunchly pro-Western government. In other news, former GOP Presidential candidate Mitt Romney refrained from saying “I told you so” and patiently awaits an apology from anyone at any of the major news outlets in America for mocking his position that Russia is an enemy of the United States.Also, former GOP Vice-Presidential candidate...

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Remember When Ronald Reagan Was in Congress?… Yeah, You’re Not Alone Posted by Jim Hoft on Saturday, March 1, 2014, 1:10 PM The Democrat Party tweeted this out yesterday. They want to raise the minimum wage like when Reagan was in Congress. Except that Ronald Reagan never was in Congress.

In case you missed it...see this idiot reveal how the left are the real racists here.