Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Congresswoman Hopeful that Connecticut School Massacre Will Lead to Gun Control
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 15 Dec 2012 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/16/2012 1:29:16 PM PST by John Semmens

Friday’s murder spree at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut took the lives of 28 people and has already sparked calls for tighter gun control.

Representative Carolyn McCarthy (D-NY) characterized the slayings as “a very fortuitous event for those of us determined to disarm the general public. The fact that so many of the victims were young children should go a long way toward softening up the opposition of the right wing gun nuts who have blocked constructive measures against this much needed action.”

The ineffectiveness of current laws banning weapons in public schools failed to stem McCarthy’s hopes. “Just because existing laws haven’t proved sufficient doesn’t mean we don’t need more of them,” McCarthy argued. “At the very least adding another illegal weapons possession charge to the indictment of the perpetrators of these heinous crimes has got to have some deterrent effect.”

“It’s long past the time that we recognize that the ancient rationale for private gun ownership is no longer relevant,” the Representative said. “People don’t need to personally hunt for food. There are no Indians on the rampage in our towns. The skills our ancestors had with firearms have atrophied in our modern world.”

“America would be a much safer place if only government personnel were allowed to carry guns,” McCarthy maintained. “As history has shown in other countries, concentrating the firepower in the hands of well trained police and military personnel is more conducive to securing a peaceful environment for everyone to enjoy.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2012/12/15/right-to-work-passes-in-michigan-violence-feared/


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: crime; democrats; guns; liberals; newtown; sandyhook; satire

1 posted on 12/16/2012 1:29:22 PM PST by John Semmens
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Never trust a woman who builds her career on the butchering of her husband. As always, very good satire!


2 posted on 12/16/2012 1:31:45 PM PST by miss marmelstein
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

I sure wish you’d quit posting this asinine, childish garbage. This isn’t humor; it’s sick.


3 posted on 12/16/2012 1:32:29 PM PST by Chainmail (A simple rule of life: if you can be blamed, you're responsible.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

It’s getting awfully difficult to distinguish sarcasm from reality these days. Sad.


4 posted on 12/16/2012 1:33:59 PM PST by goodwithagun (My gun has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Chainmail
We all know what opinions are like.

There are a lot of us that enjoy clever satire.

5 posted on 12/16/2012 1:35:51 PM PST by doorgunner69
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Chainmail

Satire, yes. Could it be true? Yes.


6 posted on 12/16/2012 1:36:15 PM PST by unixfox (Abolish Slavery, Repeal The 16th Amendment!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
obama all the guns
7 posted on 12/16/2012 1:37:25 PM PST by FrankR (They will become our ultimate masters the day we surrender the 2nd Amendment.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Chainmail
Welcome to FR, newbie.

If you can't recognize and appreciate good satire, then either don't read the article or leave. Satire such as this has long been a staple on FR.

8 posted on 12/16/2012 1:38:18 PM PST by SW6906 (6 things you can't have too much of: sex, money, firewood, horsepower, guns and ammunition.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: unixfox

All good satire has a bit of the truth in it. This one is so close to the truth, one has to pause and think “is this really satire?”


9 posted on 12/16/2012 1:40:31 PM PST by SW6906 (6 things you can't have too much of: sex, money, firewood, horsepower, guns and ammunition.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Excellent perspective of the Leftist mind once again John.


10 posted on 12/16/2012 1:49:00 PM PST by rockinqsranch (Dems, Libs, Socialists, call 'em what you will, they ALL have fairies livin' in their trees.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
We must have more laws against guns. This kid simply ignored about 20 laws and still went ahead with his plan. We need to start a squared law system. Take the number of laws broken and square them. Say if someone broke 20 laws then 20 squared would be 400 laws broken that he can be charged with after his suicide. and of course ///SSS
11 posted on 12/16/2012 1:58:02 PM PST by mountainlion (Live well for those that did not make it back.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Very fortuitous.

What a POS.


12 posted on 12/16/2012 2:09:34 PM PST by Venturer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Venturer

Damn this satire crap, they got me again. I hate this crap I wish they would stop posting this horse dung. The real news is bad enough without these tards posting crap.


13 posted on 12/16/2012 2:11:10 PM PST by Venturer
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: Venturer

Oh, come on! Doesn’t it amaze you that you’re through the first paragraph before you realize you’ve been snookered again? My only fear is that I’ll post something stupid before realizing it’s satire.


14 posted on 12/16/2012 2:20:05 PM PST by miss marmelstein
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

“There are no Indians on the rampage in our towns”

Nope, just hoodlums and lunatics.

Good piece of satire.. but sure close to reality. :)


15 posted on 12/16/2012 2:32:44 PM PST by berdie
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: miss marmelstein

Wasn’t there a noted knife altercation the same day as the shootings in which numerous individuals were stabbed to death?

They’ll eventually be moving to legislate the sharpening of sticks.


16 posted on 12/16/2012 2:38:43 PM PST by conserv8
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: SW6906; doorgunner69
Satire is funny - anything involving the horrific murder of 20 innocent children and 6 good people - isn't funny.

For SW6906: the SW 6906 is a lousy pistol. If you really need a 9mm, stick to a Browning, "newbie".

17 posted on 12/16/2012 3:07:09 PM PST by Chainmail (A simple rule of life: if you can be blamed, you're responsible.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Venturer
Damn this satire crap, they got me again.

Make a habit to check the source and the keywords on threads and it will rarely , if ever, happen again.

18 posted on 12/16/2012 3:11:23 PM PST by houeto (https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate/)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
Interesting...

You yourself use the slaughter of twenty children to make a political point by lying about a known gun-control Representative.

Anybody, and I mean anybody, using the murder of these children to make a political statement or to show the world how clever he thinks he is is a scumbag.

19 posted on 12/16/2012 3:26:16 PM PST by wtc911 (Amigo - you've been had.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: mountainlion

I personally am sick and f#$#$ tired of seeing Bloomberg harping about gun control all over the place while people are completely ignoring the law almost daily in his city. I guess now that he’s gotten the Soda Emergency under control, he’s going on to bigger and better things.


20 posted on 12/16/2012 4:40:51 PM PST by The Antiyuppie ("When small men cast long shadows, then it is very late in the day.")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens
And it will succeed.

Just like Prohibition was effective against drinking alcohol and the War on Drugs has made us drug-free.

21 posted on 12/16/2012 4:43:37 PM PST by Lizavetta (You get what you tolerate)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: John Semmens

Hard to satire Congresswoman McCarthy, because this is exactly how she feels about the issue!


22 posted on 12/17/2012 5:56:01 AM PST by SuziQ
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Chainmail

Satire doesn’t have to be ‘funny’, just on point.


23 posted on 12/17/2012 6:00:31 AM PST by SuziQ
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 17 | View Replies]

To: Chainmail

24 posted on 01/16/2013 1:12:20 PM PST by Lazamataz (LAZ'S LAW: As an argument with liberals goes on, the probability of being called racist approaches 1)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: wtc911
Interesting....You yourself use the slaughter of twenty children to make a political point by lying about a known gun-control Representative. Anybody, and I mean anybody, using the murder of these children to make a political statement or to show the world how clever he thinks he is is a scumbag.

Interesting....You yourself defend a known gun-control Representative. Anybody, and I mean anybody, defending an antigun Representative is is a scumbag.

Why the f*** are you still on our website, you liberal scumbag?

25 posted on 01/16/2013 1:16:42 PM PST by Lazamataz (LAZ'S LAW: As an argument with liberals goes on, the probability of being called racist approaches 1)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: miss marmelstein

Satire now...tomorrow..? Who can say?


26 posted on 01/16/2013 1:20:41 PM PST by who knows what evil? (G-d saved more animals than people on the ark...www.siameserescue.org.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: SW6906

John’s satirical skills are so keen that he is often able to draw in ‘high information’ people like FR posters before they realize they’ve been had. I’ve learned a bit...whenever I see a story that seems to be just a tad absurd, I go back and look for the ‘Semmens label’ before I post and make a fool of myself.


27 posted on 01/16/2013 1:25:59 PM PST by who knows what evil? (G-d saved more animals than people on the ark...www.siameserescue.org.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz
{{{HUGS}}} ah forget that...
HANDSHAKE!!
28 posted on 01/16/2013 1:33:15 PM PST by no-to-illegals (Please God, Protect and Bless Our Men and Women in Uniform with Victory. Amen.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 24 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Off your meds or back on the corner again for a nickle bag? Which is it that has you digging around to find something to rant about? Remember your higher power and get control of yourself.


29 posted on 01/16/2013 2:36:03 PM PST by wtc911 (Amigo - you've been had.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 25 | View Replies]

To: wtc911
Anybody, and I mean anybody, using the murder of these children to make a political statement or to show the world how clever he thinks he is is a scumbag.

Why, I've even seen people use the murder of 3,000 Americans to make political statements. They must be scumbags, too. Don't you agree "wtc911" ?

30 posted on 01/16/2013 2:44:18 PM PST by Sirius Lee (All that is required for evil to advance is for government to do "something")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Sirius Lee

My freep-name is not political or clever or meant as self-described satire. It is a tribute to the people I knew personally who died there that day. If you have a problem with that then so be it...I could not care less.


31 posted on 01/16/2013 4:29:21 PM PST by wtc911 (Amigo - you've been had.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: wtc911
No, I just occasionally look for what wtc911, a liberal who is also a race-troll, has to say while denigrating solid Free Republic Members. I look for this troll from time to time, and wonder aloud (sometimes pinging Admin Moderators) why he is still permitted on the forum.

Count on me to follow you until the day you are finally zotted.

Cheers.

32 posted on 01/16/2013 7:07:45 PM PST by Lazamataz (LAZ'S LAW: As an argument with liberals goes on, the probability of being called racist approaches 1)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 29 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

Hey, if you’ve got nothing better to do with your time than wasting it on researching months old posts then absolutely, knock yourself out...it’s a bit pathetic (actually, more than a bit) but it’s your life, your choice and we all know your history of choices made,


33 posted on 01/16/2013 7:16:07 PM PST by wtc911 (Amigo - you've been had.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson