Posted on 12/16/2012 1:29:16 PM PST by John Semmens
Friday’s murder spree at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut took the lives of 28 people and has already sparked calls for tighter gun control.
Representative Carolyn McCarthy (D-NY) characterized the slayings as “a very fortuitous event for those of us determined to disarm the general public. The fact that so many of the victims were young children should go a long way toward softening up the opposition of the right wing gun nuts who have blocked constructive measures against this much needed action.”
The ineffectiveness of current laws banning weapons in public schools failed to stem McCarthy’s hopes. “Just because existing laws haven’t proved sufficient doesn’t mean we don’t need more of them,” McCarthy argued. “At the very least adding another illegal weapons possession charge to the indictment of the perpetrators of these heinous crimes has got to have some deterrent effect.”
“It’s long past the time that we recognize that the ancient rationale for private gun ownership is no longer relevant,” the Representative said. “People don’t need to personally hunt for food. There are no Indians on the rampage in our towns. The skills our ancestors had with firearms have atrophied in our modern world.”
“America would be a much safer place if only government personnel were allowed to carry guns,” McCarthy maintained. “As history has shown in other countries, concentrating the firepower in the hands of well trained police and military personnel is more conducive to securing a peaceful environment for everyone to enjoy.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2012/12/15/right-to-work-passes-in-michigan-violence-feared/
Never trust a woman who builds her career on the butchering of her husband. As always, very good satire!
I sure wish you’d quit posting this asinine, childish garbage. This isn’t humor; it’s sick.
It’s getting awfully difficult to distinguish sarcasm from reality these days. Sad.
There are a lot of us that enjoy clever satire.
Satire, yes. Could it be true? Yes.
If you can't recognize and appreciate good satire, then either don't read the article or leave. Satire such as this has long been a staple on FR.
All good satire has a bit of the truth in it. This one is so close to the truth, one has to pause and think “is this really satire?”
Excellent perspective of the Leftist mind once again John.
Very fortuitous.
What a POS.
Damn this satire crap, they got me again. I hate this crap I wish they would stop posting this horse dung. The real news is bad enough without these tards posting crap.
Oh, come on! Doesn’t it amaze you that you’re through the first paragraph before you realize you’ve been snookered again? My only fear is that I’ll post something stupid before realizing it’s satire.
“There are no Indians on the rampage in our towns”
Nope, just hoodlums and lunatics.
Good piece of satire.. but sure close to reality. :)
Wasn’t there a noted knife altercation the same day as the shootings in which numerous individuals were stabbed to death?
They’ll eventually be moving to legislate the sharpening of sticks.
For SW6906: the SW 6906 is a lousy pistol. If you really need a 9mm, stick to a Browning, "newbie".
Make a habit to check the source and the keywords on threads and it will rarely , if ever, happen again.
You yourself use the slaughter of twenty children to make a political point by lying about a known gun-control Representative.
Anybody, and I mean anybody, using the murder of these children to make a political statement or to show the world how clever he thinks he is is a scumbag.
I personally am sick and f#$#$ tired of seeing Bloomberg harping about gun control all over the place while people are completely ignoring the law almost daily in his city. I guess now that he’s gotten the Soda Emergency under control, he’s going on to bigger and better things.
Just like Prohibition was effective against drinking alcohol and the War on Drugs has made us drug-free.
Hard to satire Congresswoman McCarthy, because this is exactly how she feels about the issue!
Satire doesn’t have to be ‘funny’, just on point.
Interesting....You yourself defend a known gun-control Representative. Anybody, and I mean anybody, defending an antigun Representative is is a scumbag.
Why the f*** are you still on our website, you liberal scumbag?
Satire now...tomorrow..? Who can say?
John’s satirical skills are so keen that he is often able to draw in ‘high information’ people like FR posters before they realize they’ve been had. I’ve learned a bit...whenever I see a story that seems to be just a tad absurd, I go back and look for the ‘Semmens label’ before I post and make a fool of myself.
Off your meds or back on the corner again for a nickle bag? Which is it that has you digging around to find something to rant about? Remember your higher power and get control of yourself.
Why, I've even seen people use the murder of 3,000 Americans to make political statements. They must be scumbags, too. Don't you agree "wtc911" ?
My freep-name is not political or clever or meant as self-described satire. It is a tribute to the people I knew personally who died there that day. If you have a problem with that then so be it...I could not care less.
Count on me to follow you until the day you are finally zotted.
Cheers.
Hey, if you’ve got nothing better to do with your time than wasting it on researching months old posts then absolutely, knock yourself out...it’s a bit pathetic (actually, more than a bit) but it’s your life, your choice and we all know your history of choices made,
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