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DUmmie FUnnies 08-14-07 ("How many DUers have started meds since becoming a member ...")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | August 14, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 08/14/2007 6:26:33 PM PDT by PJ-Comix

Among the most popular of the DUFU editions have been those about meds. Specifically DUmmies talking (bragging) about the many meds upon which they are absolutely dependent. In fact, to read these DUmmie Meds threads, you would think that meds are as vital to DUmmies as food and water. Come to think of it, most DUmmies would rather mainline meds than eat a filet mignon. In the spirit of drug dependency we now have this DUmmie THREAD titled, "Just Curious...How many DUers have started meds since becoming a member of the community??" So let us now watch the DUmmies pop their pills in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, popping nothing more powerful than an aspirin to make it through this thread, is in the [brackets]:

Just Curious...How many DUers have started meds since becoming a member of the community??

[If they weren't druggies to begin with, by now they are on their way to OD City.]

I am just wondering. I have been here for a few years now. Sometimes I just get so depressed. I feel so hopeless. Really, I can't count the times I have been so shocked by the events that have taken place in this country and abroad by the mob in DC.

[I think you're going to have to drop some heavy duty acid after Election Day 2008.]

The victories we have experienced, seem so short lived. Only to be followed by more assaults on our democracy.

[We like to call this phenomenom Freudenschade, baby!]

OK...so Rove is going back to Texas. Hard to get excited about that on the heals of the new FISA legislation. I hate the turd as much as anyone but that wasn't even enough to arouse me after the last ass kicking.

[You are now entering the Sedation Zone.]

I am on Effexor XR now. Been on everything else before this new try.

[Effexor XR for a DUmmie on his way to the ER.]

My own life is in just as much peril as our country's.

[Tonight on CBS Evening News: America on Effexor XR!!!]

I. Don't. Feel. Good.

[Don't. Worry. Feel. Happy.]

ativan-I tried zoloft but couldn't....cum

[Try zaftig and you will still have same problem.]

I love ATIVAN tis my drug of choice!!!!!!

[ATIVAN for DUmmies who think young!!!!!!!]

ativan helps me maintain some normalcy

[Sorry about that ativan failure.]

Just told my doc I won't take Effexor. Hang in there, this place is as good for support as it is for doom.

[Holding out for Lithium?]

Love the DU mood swings like a roller coaster. THIS is the GREATEST PLACE ON EARTH TO VENT!!!

[Uppers and Downers! WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!]

rAmen! This is my only real refuge, I live in red state hell. DU is therapy.

[Pardon my ignorance but the only rAmen I know about is some type of Chinese noodles.]

went on zoloft about a month into this admin. wish I was joking

[Seek help. Call the emergency BDS hotline: 1-800-BUSH-WON.]

Keep taking the meds. The alternative is way too messy. Keep seeing your doctor. Keep seeing your therapist.

[Keep overdosing. Keep seeing your rubber room.]

I intend to someday quit effexor completely, but I don't know how soon I will be ready. I am no longer depressed, and I don't want to be taking a drug just to make me feel normal, but the withdrawal is so bad, I have to quit gradually.

[The thought of withdrawal is enough to depress you into doubling your effexor ration.]

Effexor has some of the worst side effect (brain-shivers, weight gain) of all of them, and also some of the worst withdrawal symptoms.

[One of the really bad Effexor side effects is a desire to remain in DUmmieland.]

I've taken Zoloft before, when I was diagnosed with Serious Depression at age 25. Quitting Zoloft was nothing. Didn't feel any withdrawals at all. This f*cking EffexorXR is 100x worse than cocaine to stop. And, EffexorXR does not get you high.

[How about the cheaper alternative of just sticking your head in a bucket of water and keep it there?]

I am also interested in some of the headway they are making in very targeted, low dose electro-shock therapy. There are very recent studies out that seem to be quite promising.

[You might also want to consider the very targeted, low dose lobotomies.

Effexor makes people hostile. That explains DUs attitude.

[So would Atavil explain the DUmb part?]

Effexor is what worked for me, but I'm off of it now because I'm broke. And I have no health insurance. It turned down the volume of my anxiety attacks to a manageable level, which I first noticed when I climbed onto a roof without freaking out (heights - bad). Unfortunately, it didn't save my marriage, and it may have actually hurt because it killed my sex drive.

[In addition to killing off your brain cells.]

I have been on either Zanex or valium since 1987 All due to anxiety and panic attacks . However since the loss of jobs and not being able to find new work things have really gotten worse than ever , this on top of this admin and it's freakish dealings which affect just about everything one can think of just must have pushed me over the edge

[Zanex for the odd years, valium for the even years. And crack for the leap years.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dummies; meds
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To: Bluegrass Federalist

It has to be real because nobody would believe it as fiction. That’s how you can always tell. If it makes sense, no matter how fantastic, it’s probably a story. If it’s too fantastic to believe and seems completely illogical and irrational, it is probably real.


41 posted on 08/14/2007 9:47:39 PM PDT by Duke Nukum (...till pity is become a trade, and generosity a science that makes men rich...)
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To: PJ-Comix

Gosh, who woulda thought it
/sarc


42 posted on 08/14/2007 10:25:34 PM PDT by Greystoke
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To: dirtbiker

You forgot - Act now and receive a free tin foil hat!


43 posted on 08/14/2007 10:31:53 PM PDT by Greystoke
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To: PJ-Comix

“rAmen” is the closing word of prayer to the Flying Spaghetti Monster, which is an atheist construct in mockery of God (or indeed, any supernatural entity). The story is that there is just as much physical evidence for the existence and activity of God as there is for some sort of Flying Spaghetti Monster doing the same thing(s).

An FSMite blessing is “may He touch you with His Noodly Appendage.”


44 posted on 08/15/2007 1:59:51 AM PDT by ExGeeEye (Liberalism always generates the exact opposite of its stated intent. ALWAYS.)
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To: PJ-Comix
You missed this one:

"I keep on thinking maybe even everybody else is on something even, what is a poor crazy person to do "

yitbos

45 posted on 08/15/2007 2:14:26 AM PDT by bruinbirdman ("Those who control language control minds." -- Ayn Rand)
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To: PJ-Comix

Is it a good thing or a bad thing that I do not know what most of what they are talking about is?


46 posted on 08/15/2007 2:29:33 AM PDT by CzarNicky (The problem with bad ideas is that they seemed like good ideas at the time.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Keep taking the meds. The alternative is way too messy.

Reality?

47 posted on 08/15/2007 2:32:51 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Let’s see, the DUmmies are taking Effexor, Ativan, Zoloft, Xanex, Valium and none of them work. See, that’s because those things only help people with organic depression and/or anxiety. There is no cure for BDS.


48 posted on 08/15/2007 2:44:25 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I. Don't. Feel. Good.

No wonder. It's gotta be hard as hell to type that way.

49 posted on 08/15/2007 2:45:47 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: Greystoke
You forgot - Act now and receive a free tin foil hat!

You're right!

"You receive all this for only $19.95. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! (Can't have a infomercial without those 4 words.)

Be one of the first 500 callers and I'll not only throw in this stylish tinfoil hat, but I'll DOUBLE your Home Electro-shock DIY kit! THAT'S 2 KITS, PLUS THE STYLISH TINFOIL HAT, AND A FREE CARRYING CASE, ALL FOR ONLY $19.95! But you have to order NOW!

Call toll free 1-800-SHOCK-ME, or order online at www.shockadummie.com.

Operators are standing by...."

50 posted on 08/15/2007 2:55:16 AM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: PJ-Comix
went on zoloft about a month into this admin.

This is what I'm talking about. A month into this administration everything--as far as anyone knew--was right with the world. This DUmmie goes and gets a prescription for anti-depressants because the president has an (R) behind his name?

The thought that the awesome beauty of trees coated in a February frost or the feeling on that first day when you can smell spring in the air could be ruined by who's in the White House just amazes me. How hard is it to just make up your mind to be happy? Maybe I'm the one who's crazy, but on the whole, I have far more days when I'm happy than when I'm not.

51 posted on 08/15/2007 3:00:51 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: mowowie
I had a similar reaction to prescription Claratin.

Even though it's for head congestion, it triggered migraines, and altered my mood to the point that I wanted to kill just about anyone and anything that ticked me off. (Not a good thing when you drive a truck for a living).

Took me almost 2 weeks to become "normal" again....

52 posted on 08/15/2007 3:02:17 AM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: PJ-Comix
Just told my doc I won't take Effexor.

You know we're overmedicated when we can tell our docs what we will and will not take. If the doctor doesn't come back with "well, you're probably going to die," or "you'll be in crippling pain without it," chances are you don't need it.

53 posted on 08/15/2007 3:06:25 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: CzarNicky
Is it a good thing or a bad thing that I do not know what most of what they are talking about is?

I'll say it's a good thing, because:
1. You would not know what these drugs are for if you do not need then (always good!), and
2. If you knew what they were talking about, you'd probably be a DUmmie....

54 posted on 08/15/2007 3:09:05 AM PDT by dirtbiker (I tried to see things from the liberal point-of-view, but I couldn't get my head up my a$$...)
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To: PJ-Comix
rAmen! This is my only real refuge

There ya go! The simple pleasure of a nice hot bowl of noodles to nourish the body and warm the soul. They're cheap too, and now available without a prescription.

55 posted on 08/15/2007 3:09:30 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
This f*cking EffexorXR is 100x worse than cocaine to stop.

Then you should use cocaine to ween yourself off the Effexor. Like when Peter Griffin took up crack to help him stop drinking.

56 posted on 08/15/2007 3:12:38 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I am also interested in some of the headway they are making in very targeted, low dose electro-shock therapy.

Electro-shock therapy! Headway! Get it? DUmmy made a FUnny.

57 posted on 08/15/2007 3:15:18 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
I have been on either Zanex or valium since 1987 All due to anxiety and panic attacks . However since the loss of jobs and not being able to find new work things have really gotten worse than ever

A lot of employees have success in holding down a job by not showing up high all the time.

58 posted on 08/15/2007 3:18:12 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Effexor makes people hostile.

Pitt should take it to get his angry back.

59 posted on 08/15/2007 3:20:53 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Effexor is what worked for me, but I'm off of it now because I'm broke. And I have no health insurance.

And the Big Bad Bush won't give me any health insurance. And I can't get on my life partner's health insurance. So I'm broke and depressed and it's all Bush's fault.

60 posted on 08/15/2007 3:24:21 AM PDT by Paul Heinzman (Fishin' for a good time starts with throwin' in your line.)
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