Posted on 10/23/2015 11:48:42 AM PDT by NYer
When it comes to teenagers, you expect a certain amount of eye rolling and apathy, but put those same kids in a faith formation class for an hour and fifteen minutes at the end of a long school day and right at the dinner hour and you’ll see a level of teenage disinterest that could make you wither on the spot. That’s what my husband and I faced when we stood before the 21 high school sophomores we teach at our upstate New York parish.
The scene was nothing new and nothing unexpected. We taught most of the same kids last year since they’re in a two-year program that will culminate in confirmation this spring. However, I’m willing to wager that their apathy isn’t necessarily related to a surge of teenage surliness but rather to a lack of foundational catechesis, and I say that while having taught many of these kids in fourth and fifth grade. I have used every trick in the book—from group activities to stump-the-teacher sessions to outright bribery through baked ziti and brownies—to get these kids to hear me when I talk about the Mass, about the Gospel, about our beautiful Catholic teachings and traditions. Yet every year, when they reluctantly return to class, I find I’m grateful if even half of them remember the Our Father.
When I look out at these kids—regardless of age, regardless of whether they’ve gone to Catholic or public elementary school—I assume I am seeing 75 percent as future ex-Catholics.
The blame falls squarely in the lap of the Church, which has, for decades, let the parents of these children go spiritually hungry, through misguided catechesis in their youth and preaching that failed to challenge and engage them as adults. As Pope Francis told priests at ordination this year: “May your homilies not be boring; may your homilies touch the heart of the people because they come from your heart …”
Some might say that even with unchallenging preaching the Holy Eucharist should be enough to draw people in, but how can that be if people have no grasp of the power and wonder of the Sacrament because no one has taught them—not in a classroom and not from the pulpit?
People are hungry, yes, but before they can run to Jesus in the Eucharist, they must walk into a parish on any given Sunday and hear the words that feed their flagging spirits and find fellowship that reminds them they are not alone. As a speaker and retreat leader I can tell you, from both personal experience and from encounters with other Catholics around the country that neither of those things exist in abundance in US parishes. Some communities are getting it right, but these lucky few are the sad exceptions, not the happy norm.
And so people go elsewhere. Perhaps to the nondenominational church up the street where the preaching is riveting and relevant and the community is fully engaged and made up predominantly of former Catholics. They don’t have Eucharist, but people are feeling fed, and returning, week after week. When you sit in Mass this Sunday, try to experience it as a newcomer, and ask yourself: If this was your first and only experience of Catholicism, would you ever return?
Back when I wrote my Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Catholic Catechism, I heard the same refrain time and again from adult Catholics disconnected from the faith: “Why didn’t I learn any of this when I was growing up?” Many of them were raised, as I was, in what I call the “Era of the Collage,” with lots of cutting and pasting of happy Jesus, but little basic information about the things that sustain you for a lifetime, the beauty of a living, breathing faith. I credit my mother with bridging the wide chasm that grew between my official religious education and my actual faith, and that’s why I know we first and foremost need our families to turn our Church around.
Catechesis must begin by drawing families in, by making them feel welcome, by giving them something more than registration deadlines and weekly envelopes. Only when they feel as though they belong in this Church—to this Church—will they be open to retracing the spiritual steps of their childhood and embracing the path of faith as an adult. When they do that, they will bring their children with them, and faith formation will no longer be seen as a ticket that must be stamped in order to receive a sacrament and then “graduate” from religion, but rather as a first step on a lifelong journey.
Of course teens will be teens, and they will still roll their eyes and answer questions with stony silence, but beneath that will be a foundation of real faith, and the powerful, life-giving knowledge that they are loved beyond measure by a God who created them, and saved them, and waits for them.
I believe the kids sitting in our class acting like they couldn’t care less about religion desperately want and need a God like that, as do their parents. Unless we find a way to make God real and relevant to their lives, he will always remain an abstract idea to be sat through, rather than engaged, which is a loss not just for them but for all of us.
Ping!
Why do Catholic parishes insist on having CFF classes on weeknight so, in dark and cold after kids have been in school all day?
Why not on Sunday mornings the way Protestants do Church school
Our kids have CCD right before Mass.
” a faith formation class for an hour and fifteen minutes at the end of a long school day and right at the dinner hour “
Maybe that’s part of the problem.
“Why do Catholic parishes insist on having CFF classes on weeknight so...Why not on Sunday mornings the way Protestants do Church school?”
I agree and I’d go further. I think there should be a Mass every Sunday that Sunday School kids attend and go straight to class from — and attendance at BOTH should be mandatory every week. In addition, the Mass should be just for the Sunday School kids (and their parents) and for any Catholic school kids who would like to attend that particular Mass (because it’s mostly kids).
When my son was in public school, he went to (Catholic) Sunday school and I was appalled at how many of the other children’s parents told me that they (the parents) almost never went to church themselves — they’d hang out in the church parking lot while Sunday School was going on — and that they almost never took their children to church. Seemed that figured their children’s attendance at Sunday School alone “counted” as Mass for the whole family.
“Why not on Sunday mornings the way Protestants do Church school?”
That will not be a cure all, but it is worth considering. And I’m stating this as a Protestant. But our church also has a youth group that meets on Sunday afternoon, and studying the Bible is included there as well as social activities and food. (Feed them and they shall come)
And in response to Ms. Poust’s sentence: “Perhaps to the nondenominational church up the street where the preaching is riveting and relevant and the community is fully engaged and made up predominantly of former Catholics. They don’t have Eucharist....”
And if your end up at a Disciples of Christ congregation, we have communion every Sunday. And we offer it to any believing Christian. No questions asked.
I’m not trying to recruit but am pointing out that there is a Protestant group that does weekly communion.
yes, that is part of the problem. It is also part of the reason why churches have problems recruiting excellent teachers. Parents with children can’t leave their homes to teach at 7pm at the craziest part of the day ( dinner, homework baths..etc)
Also, blame lies with parents and a lack of meaningful prayer in the home. Do you begin and close each day with prayer. Is there always prayer before meals. What about reading from the bible so the “stories” they hear in church have more meaning. It is hard. When parents work and are constantly bombarded with e-mails and phone calls that need attending to, it is easier to hook up little Johnny with angry birds on an ipad than to teach about Joshua and the Battle of Jericho.
My wife and I were both very secure in our faith. We both had family that did the teaching, and our foundation was not just laid at the church classes.
The other issue is we, as Christians, need to learn to stop giving milk to kids who are ready for more solid food. My old Lutheran pastor wasn't a great speaker, but by God he hit us with issues in confirmation class that I have seen few ask fully grown adults. The point being make the Faith something beyond happy clappy platitudes sung with an acoustic guitar.
Were Catholic young adults leaving in droves before the “Vatican II” update?
If not, perhaps doing a downdate would amend it? Does anyone know how to do a downdate out there?
I’ve never seen more “glad to be Catholic” children then those of Traditional Latin Mass Catholic families.
That was the case in our religion classes 20+ years ago. I see it hasn’t changed at all.
Vatican II ruined Catholicism. It took the mystery, the sanctity, the solemnity, and the uniqueness, out of the Mass and tried to make it just like any other social event. Many point the Church’s inability to change with the times as a reason for Catholics leaving in droves. I believe its just the opposite. For me (55 years old) and many of my 12 years in Catholic school friends, our Church left us. Its simply unrecognizable.
Perhaps if ya'll shared the Gospel with them instead of the false teachings that you can only be saved by the Eucharist.
All through the book of John it is evident that one comes to Christ through believing in Him. The Greek is clear on this.
Perhaps if catholics understood the use of symbols in John that would be a help as well.
John speaks of the light, living water, the door, the vine, the Good Shepherd, bread, food, flesh, blood all in relation to Jesus.
If catholics believe you "must eat His flesh and drink His blood" then they must also believe He literally is a door or a vine. But we know they don't accept the last two as literal. They must also believe you should gouge your eye out if it causes you to sin. I don't see many blind catholics.
A proper understanding of context and John's literary style of writing would do catholics well.
God doesn’t touch people’s hearts on our schedule. Some people find him when they are young, others when they’re older.
Faith formation in general and the teen ministry specifically needs to be “inspirational and transformational”. The teens must be engaged. Using properly formed older teens and young adults as a part of the Confirmation “process” is critical to getting that engagement. I work with some incredible teens and young adults in 3 parishes in SoCal. I have great hope for the future of our youth. “Jesus I trust in You”
Some percentage of teenagers wander. Integrating them in the church or faith community is a family affair. If one loves God with all his heart, soul, and strength and believes that Jesus is the Messiah, one will appreciate the Mass for what it is, where the scripture permeates the worship and one publicly confesses the truth in good order and decorum. If one is not fully committed to the LORD Jesus Christ, one will wander from faith community to community, or sin to sin. It's a shame that the children of believing parents wander to far countries and squander their heritage yet some prodigals return.
Oddly enough Patheos published an article on religious retention rates that showed the highest retention rates among Biblical faith groups as being the Jewish and Catholic faiths. There is a anecdotal retention problem for Preacher's Kids (PKs) for which I'm still searching for statistics.
same experience here
My wife and I were both very secure in our faith. We both had family that did the teaching, and our foundation was not just laid at the church classes.
What is taught, the time of day or night, whether or not food is served, matters little IF the faith is not practiced in the home. Over and over again, I have seen these scenarios play out - the parents (or grandparents) drop the child(ren) off at church for their class and depart, only to return when class is over. With the support of our parish priest, we implemented a requirement that children had to remain after class for mass. This, unfortunately, turned into a "gift" for the parents who used the time to go shopping or run errands. We have a new, young pastor who welcomes local families to have their children baptized. They are required to meet with him over the span of several weeks in preparation for reception of the sacrament. On the big day, they attend mass with the baby; however, their "guests" (other family members) show up AFTER mass for the actual ceremony. Not one of these families has ever returned, afterwards. We will probably see them again when the child is in 2nd grade and they want him/her to receive First Communion.
Last year, I was asked to prepare several teens for the Sacrament of Confirmation. We met, at the convenience of the children, on a weekday afternoon, after school and before dinner. Since this was a small group, I prepared my materials by incorporating YouTube videos and used social media to maintain contact with them in between classes. I also requested the parents to remain for each class. Not surprisingly, each one had an excuse as to why that was not possible.
It has been my experience that most parents are ignorant of their faith and lay the responsibility on the church, to properly form their children. The message communicated to their children, unfortunately, is that faith belongs in the church not in the home.
Those of us who are older, never questioned our faith instruction. If our parents said this was important, it was .. period. Our family attended mass on Sunday and lived the faith in the home. Young people today are taught to question everything. Unlike us who grew up at a time when Sunday was a day for worship and family, these youth spend Sunday doing sports, attending birthday parties, shopping at the mall, oftentimes because both parents now work.
There are no simple answers to resolving this dilemma.
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