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I'd Kill Myself if I Had That Many Kids
NC Register ^ | July 30, 2014 | Matthew Archbold

Posted on 07/30/2014 1:44:17 PM PDT by NYer

My wife and I recently attended a sports banquet for one of our kids' sports teams at a local restaurant. It was one of those events that I wanted to go to about as much as I wanted to get three teeth pulled. But my wife assured me it would be fun. I didn't believe her but I came anyway.

We've gone to so many of these things as my five kids are on at least three sports teams. All the kids sat together at a long table and all the parents sat at another table with the coaches. I have a theory about sports teams, the worse a team, the more coaches it has. And this team had lots of coaches.

We were seated with about eight coaches and some parents we didn't really know.

So what's the first thing someone we don't really know will bring up as a conversation starter? Well, it's the only thing they know about us which is that we have five kids. This one coach said he knew it was us when we arrived because he saw all five of our kids walking in. "That could only be the Archbolds," he laughed.

The mom directly across from me, who I didn't really know and hadn't seen at many games, leaned in conspiritorially and asked, "Who has five children? I'd kill myself if I had that many kids."

Dopey me, I actually felt embarrassed for her. I figured she couldn't hear that well and didn't know who they were talking about and would regret her comment when she learned it was the man and woman sitting directly across from her.

I shouldn't have worried. The coach seemed flummoxed, pointed at us, and then quickly engaged in a conversation on the other side of the table.

(Excerpt) Read more at ncregister.com ...


TOPICS: Catholic; Humor; Religion & Culture
KEYWORDS: catholic
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To: NYer

I remember once hearing “Saying there are too many children is like saying there are too many flowers”.


41 posted on 07/30/2014 2:15:43 PM PDT by PROCON (I WILL NOT SUBMIT TO TYRANNY!)
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To: GeronL

Two cats is our limit. Since we’re likely to have Anoreth’s dog move in when she goes back to sea, it wouldn’t be fair to any of them to get another cat. Our current cats already tolerate the dog.


42 posted on 07/30/2014 2:16:47 PM PDT by Tax-chick (No power in the 'verse can stop me.)
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To: NYer

My wife and I have five kids.
My wife has three sisters.
I have two sisters and four brothers.
My mom had three sisters and three brothers.
So far I have six grandchildren.

And on and on.....


43 posted on 07/30/2014 2:16:53 PM PDT by rfreedom4u (Your feelings don't trump my free speech!)
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To: Tax-chick

bump


44 posted on 07/30/2014 2:18:17 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: NYer

I wish he had asked her why she would kill herself. Is she not competent enough to handle more than one child at a time. Or is she too selfish to share her life and money with more than one? turn it back on these idiots and let them know how ridiculous they sound


45 posted on 07/30/2014 2:18:27 PM PDT by WhyisaTexasgirlinPA (Turmoil in the Middle East? Quick Obama, show them your Peace Prize!)
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To: GeronL
Just a bit fuzzy but why are there only a few smiling? Probably a story there ...

I was thinking it was because of the clothes they're wearing. 1970?

46 posted on 07/30/2014 2:18:41 PM PDT by Tax-chick (No power in the 'verse can stop me.)
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To: rfreedom4u
My wife and I have five kids. My wife has three sisters. I have two sisters and four brothers.

How many kids do they have, in total?

47 posted on 07/30/2014 2:20:07 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: 21twelve
She and two of her sisters were born within two years!

I have twin sisters who are 13 months older than me. "Irish" triplets.

48 posted on 07/30/2014 2:21:18 PM PDT by Straight Vermonter (Posting from deep behind the Maple Curtain)
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To: GeronL

All I know is around 1953 when I would have been around 6, Daddy told us about it. If it had been left up to Mother she would never have told us. She would never say a bad thing about her family including her children.

Uncle Milton just barely got drafted for WWII but stayed in the Army tho he eventually transferred to the Air Force where he stayed until he retired.


49 posted on 07/30/2014 2:21:18 PM PDT by yarddog (Romans 8: verses 38 and 39. "For I am persuaded".)
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To: Straight Vermonter

My brother and I are one year and 5 days apart.


50 posted on 07/30/2014 2:22:45 PM PDT by mware
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To: GeronL

My wife gave birth to five (ours)
Her sisters:

one is a lesbian so no kids.
One had two kids...and

her third sister gave birth to thirteen!! She has custody of none and has lived in a park and with numerous men over the past twenty years. Luckily all her kids turned out normal.


51 posted on 07/30/2014 2:23:01 PM PDT by rfreedom4u (Your feelings don't trump my free speech!)
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To: 21twelve

My son always tells his prospects that he wants a small family-only six kids. With his sibs well into double digits, he may have a skewed perception. :)


52 posted on 07/30/2014 2:24:12 PM PDT by antidisestablishment (Islam delenda est)
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To: Celtic Conservative
My family had “only” 4 kids. But because our family was stable, religious and healthy we seemed to help raise a number of the neighbor kids who came from broken or screwed up homes. There was always more than 6 at the dinner table, LOL

We had a very similar upbringing! My friends LOVED coming over for Sunday dinner, both because my mom was a fabulous cook and because we always had a blast, swapping stories etc.

53 posted on 07/30/2014 2:24:26 PM PDT by Straight Vermonter (Posting from deep behind the Maple Curtain)
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To: rfreedom4u
her third sister gave birth to thirteen!! She has custody of none and has lived in a park and with numerous men over the past twenty years

wow.... very lucky they turned out normal

54 posted on 07/30/2014 2:27:32 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: al_c

Well, to the woman’s credit, I would imagine that she has Planned Parenthood on speed dial...


55 posted on 07/30/2014 2:27:58 PM PDT by Delta Dawn (Fluent in two languages: English and cursive.)
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To: Tax-chick

Hugs because I know. :(


56 posted on 07/30/2014 2:29:16 PM PDT by petitfour
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To: NYer

There was 5 kids in my family, it must not have overwhelmed my parents much because they took in two of my cousins.

Hubby and I had three and I also claim his son from a former marriage, so we raised 4 and at different times have had extras. Now that our children are grown I really enjoy the grandchildren, but also wish we had had more kids. Not sure why but I do feel that way. I can’t tell him that though because he wanted more to begin with.


57 posted on 07/30/2014 2:29:26 PM PDT by Tammy8
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To: GeronL
Just a bit fuzzy but why are there only a few smiling?

I'm sure you remember manual-focus cameras and the annoying fiddling about by the photographer, right?

58 posted on 07/30/2014 2:33:42 PM PDT by Charles Martel (Endeavor to persevere...)
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To: Charles Martel

lol. A little bit. I do remember the Polaroids though. heh


59 posted on 07/30/2014 2:38:33 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: petitfour

Does it sound terrible to say it feels a little better knowing I’m not the only one?

God loves children, and God loves mothers, or He wouldn’t have made it so the latter have the former!


60 posted on 07/30/2014 2:43:26 PM PDT by Tax-chick (No power in the 'verse can stop me.)
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