I'd Kill Myself if I Had That Many Kids

NC Register ^ | July 30, 2014 | Matthew Archbold

[NYer]

My wife and I recently attended a sports banquet for one of our kids' sports teams at a local restaurant. It was one of those events that I wanted to go to about as much as I wanted to get three teeth pulled. But my wife assured me it would be fun. I didn't believe her but I came anyway.

We've gone to so many of these things as my five kids are on at least three sports teams. All the kids sat together at a long table and all the parents sat at another table with the coaches. I have a theory about sports teams, the worse a team, the more coaches it has. And this team had lots of coaches.

We were seated with about eight coaches and some parents we didn't really know.

So what's the first thing someone we don't really know will bring up as a conversation starter? Well, it's the only thing they know about us which is that we have five kids. This one coach said he knew it was us when we arrived because he saw all five of our kids walking in. "That could only be the Archbolds," he laughed.

The mom directly across from me, who I didn't really know and hadn't seen at many games, leaned in conspiritorially and asked, "Who has five children? I'd kill myself if I had that many kids."

Dopey me, I actually felt embarrassed for her. I figured she couldn't hear that well and didn't know who they were talking about and would regret her comment when she learned it was the man and woman sitting directly across from her.

I shouldn't have worried. The coach seemed flummoxed, pointed at us, and then quickly engaged in a conversation on the other side of the table.

[CAluvdubya]

. My response was “ yes. And they will have two biological parents raising them in stable intact homes”

Brilliant!

[CAluvdubya]

Now when I say I have six sisters and three brothers...

Ahem.....seven now. LOL

[Slyfox]

It took me a few years but I really wish we'd had more children!

God has given you the opportunity to take care of a lot of kids and that is wonderful.

Once I get the knowhow you will be in the picture.

[Slyfox]

Now when I say I have six sisters and three brothers...

Please excuse me for my faux pas! Actually, people will be even more amazed with "seven sisters."

[CAluvdubya]

God has given you the opportunity to take care of a lot of kids and that is wonderful.

Hadn't thought of it quite that way before. Good thinking!

[CAluvdubya]

You guys should recreate this photo. Would be fun to see!

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

Sort of like when someone asks about socialization for home schooled kids when your child is standing right there beside you. I wish I could have gotten him to scream “stranger” and point at the offender! lol

[defconw]

At my old parish there were 4 sisters that had 36 kids between them. My nephew hangs out with many of them. They all live around a pond. They go down and say the Rosary together often at the pond.

Any way, I got to be pretty good friends with the one woman. We were talking about Christmas and I said that must be so fun to have Christmas at the pond. She said it would be, but they always rent a hall. See they have 8 brothers who have 68 kids between them. There are probably more than 104 now. Two of the younger brothers were just getting started. :)

[Osage Orange]

Good post.