I wanted to quickly post to you an apology. I know this thread has drifted away from the original intent of your posting. I apologize for that. I think some of the discussion this thread has brought about is rather important though. I hope you are not too angry about the directions this thread has gone in.
I believe that others who responded with various ideas regarding helping our fellow FReeper’s family are pretty much ‘on the money’. As others have pointed out knowing the SPECIFICS of belief of whichever group this person is involved with is VERY important in any attempt to get them out of what IS an abusive relationship, basically.
One must also be very aware that in SOME situations the type of psychology employed by leaders of various cults work against well meaning family members and friends. Another reason that whatever IS known about the tactics employed by a certain cult group is important.
For instance, if someone involved in a cult truly has come to believe that the leader is a good and ‘holy’ person, attacking the character of that person is NOT going to work really... Chances are high that the person they are listening to has already convinced them that others WILL try to impugn their character! (I hope that is understandable the way I’ve written it).
There are many similarities regarding belonging to a cult, and being in an abusive relationship. I don’t have experience with people in a cult per se (except a few JW’s I’ve met over the years that have come to my door! The way they looked TO me freaked me out! They kept bringing OTHERS from their ‘church’ to hear my testimony of how I knew Jesus and looked to Him in all things, and HOW I could know these things WITHOUT being a JW!! Like I said — SCARY!!! They stopped trying to convert ME, and looked at me like a child looks to a parent in some ways... TOTALLY freaked me out! But, further discussion on that is better left for a different day! :) )
Anyway, back to what I was saying... My experience is with family members who ARE in abusive relationships - including my sister who remained “loyal” to our adoptive father who was abusive. Sometimes it is NOT POSSIBLE for us to get through to these people. Sometimes the only thing we CAN do is express our openness towards helping them, and PRAY - Pray HARD that they will turn away form those leading them astray and be ready when they turn to us for help. PUSHING can sometimes make it even harder for them, and indeed may make them run the opposite direction!
I KNOW how hard this is, especially when you love that person deeply and it hurts SO MUCH to know they are hurting, and being hurt! Unless the person is a minor though - there is not much one can do - even though I know the temptation to knock some sense into them (figuratively of course) is there, as well as the frustration of not being effective in attempting to help.
As another person pointed out already - the person must WANT to leave. They must be ‘ready’ themselves, and must have reached a point where THEY have doubts about whatever they have been led to believe.
This is not meant to discourage, just to lay out some very real truths when it comes to situations in which we’d LIKE to help others, but may not be able to.
Others have also pointed out that knowing the specific group one is involved with is very important. There are those in various communities who are experienced in helping with these situations - others have listed a few such groups already on the thread.
IF there is a threat of bodily harm present THEN contacting the authorities might work. But, you’d need some sort of proof of the threats, or that won’t work either (for example if members of the cult were to leave messages on an answering machine ‘warning’ family or friends to stop interfering, and implying a threat a bodily harm).
I hope this helps somewhat even though I know it’s not much different from things others have already posted to you about this.
I WILL be praying for this person, and their family members though. That is perhaps the BEST “help” I can offer! God can do amazing things as far as opening one’s eyes to truth, and I pray that is the case when it comes to this person, and that their family may be reunited!
LR, thank you for that. No apologies are necessary though. I’ve been grateful that this thread didn’t dissolve into silliness & mockery because it is a very serious situation. You are spot on...Prayer, earnest sincere prayer is the very best weapon and God will hear. The person being prayed for may go through some ‘bumpiness’ because praying starts the ‘ultimate spirtual battle/war’.
Thank you for your thoughtful reply. As I said initially, I had posted this for another but have learned quite a bit myself. The main thing is please do pray for this person; that God will pull him back.
The age is drawing to a close and imo...well actually according to scripture, people will be more easily deceived. The defense for that is staying in the scriptures themselves and reading them and committing them to our hearts. We will then be ‘girded’ as Paul said.
Have a wonderful weekend and thanks again for your thoughtful post.