Posted on 11/29/2009 3:17:41 PM PST by leenie312
Edited on 11/29/2009 4:15:17 PM PST by Admin Moderator. [history]
For us, it was a simple problem. I idolized the holidays and put pressure on *everyone* to act a certain way. My husband responded to this by withdrawing. I increased the pressure, he withdrew more.
It would eventually get to the point where he'd become a real jerk and I'd play the victim, never realizing that I was the one pushing him in the first place.
Once I let go of the Leave it to Beaver holidays and allowed everyone to relax, he stopped withdrawing and we got along just fine.
The first two holidays after I calmed down were still a little stressful. I'd "programmed" him to freak out at that time of the year and he did it automatically.
I didn't take the bait, talked to him, reassured him that everything was OK, was a loving, forgiving, understanding wife and he eventually realized that he wasn't being threatened (I should say, "being set up") and actually learned to enjoy the holidays.
The ironic part for us is that now *he's* the one pushing to go to parades, taking the kids on a drive to look at the lights, playing Santa and excited about buying gifts. *I'm* the one saying, "sloooow doooown..."
leenie312 — please ignore the negative skeptics on this thread. You have a lot of good people here praying for you and your marriage, my unworthy prayers included. May God bring peace and reconciliation to your life.
I will pray for you and your husband. I am in a similar situation, I was the one who cheated and almost gave up, but I have turned myself around from the evil and am trying desperately to save my marriage. My wife has filed for legal separation, and doesn’t know if she can move past it or wants it to work after 23 years together. Please pray for all of us.
I will pray for you and your husband. I am in a similar situation, I was the one who cheated and almost gave up, but I have turned myself around from the evil and am trying desperately to save my marriage. My wife has filed for legal separation, and doesn’t know if she can move past it or wants it to work after 23 years together. Please pray for all of us.
I will pray, but whatever happens remember your true husband, let him sing this song for you. You will find comfort in this song, trust me, and you’ve never heard this song before despite the title, click on song #5, “Lasso the Moon”, not what you think. There have been times when I have been broken to the core, a shattered human being beyond repair, yet here I am ...
Click on song #5, your heavenly Father sings you this song ...
Prayers up.
Father I also ask that You show the love which you have for Rick through his wife Leenie and that You would show the love which you have for Leenie through Rick. That when they gaze on each other they may see Your perfect love mixed in with the love that they have for each other. Lord, bind their love with Your own. Amen
Leenie - Prayers coming your way.
Bless you, and hang in there - God will help you through this.
That's a very good point.
Heavenly Father, please help this suffering couple to be open to your Grace and Will. In Jesus name. Amen
“Through God, all things are possible. I’ve seen God heal marriages in situations like yours. It will take time, but hang in there.”
Yes I have seen this many many times! It seems to me that those who will let God work on them are then capable of submission to one another and above all forgiveness
Blessings
Mel
He has been asked to leave the thread so please do not respond to his posts.
I’m sorry, I didn’t realize he had been kicked out until after I posted.
I am doing the Praying ,not asking for the Prayer.
I am helping Her Pray, not the one with the need.
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