“Many Protestant Churches have policies of minding the personal business of church members, couple counseling, individual counseling with ‘on staff’ counselors. Men like me do not want - nor will be tolerate a church getting involved in my personal or family business...”
I disagree that this is bad, no doubt the main focus is teaching from Gods word of Christ but even Christian families have a need from time to time for intervention from elders, piers, or other wise people. So long as the core mission is not counseling having the service itself is invaluable.
Same goes for other community building, Churches should not be a place that you go to on Sunday, maybe for one bible study. The Church should be at the center of your social life, community structure, and support mechanism..
But - in the churches that I have experienced - when the counseling comes from ‘within’ the local church - personal and private information leaks out... and sooner or later the whole congregation knows everybody’s business...
It would be a wiser course for the church to send members who desire counseling to a third party - OUTSIDE the church membership...
People may think that it is God’s calling to help fellow members with such private matters — but the men I know want no part of spreading their family’s personal business all over the church - which happens time and again as church member are just human and they TALK...
If a church wants members - more members - to keep members - then STAY OUT OF MEMBERS’ personal and private matters.
If a church does not want new members and to keep them - then just keep nosing in other peoples’ business.