Posted on 08/13/2005 4:23:35 PM PDT by hiho hiho
APART FROM the horseracing tipster on the BBC’s Today programme, no one has a worse record for predictions than the sociologist of religion. The classical sociologists expected organised religion to wither on the vine. Religion might be the heart of a heartless world and the opiate of the people, but, once the people were liberated and prosperous, there would be no need for supernatural consolations.
As societies modernised, and human life was organised in an increasingly rational manner, superstition (for which read religion) would disappear. In global terms, none predicted the pentecostal and charismatic surge within Christianity. None foresaw the Islamic revival. All would find the contemporary religious culture of the United Sates inexplicable.
The sociology of religion in this country is likely to be an even more unreliable guide, since it is incorrigibly Europe-centred, and, as a result, still largely in the grip of those earlier theories of secularisation. This seems to make it incurious about significant pieces of evidence that fly in the face of secular assumptions.
For example, if we are so secular, why does the religious funeral persist? Not just most, but the overwhelming majority, of funerals are religious. This seems to me an important question, and one that clergy need to think hard about as well, if we are to continue to offer effective ministry to the bereaved.
FOR THE PAST two years, I have been thinking around this question. As I have visited people in my Kendal parish to arrange the funeral of loved ones, I have tried to tease out what it is that they think a religious funeral offers, as opposed to a secular one.
Of course, it is open for someone to say that when someone dies there is little choice. It is the vicar or nobody. Everything happens so swiftly, and you are emotionally so fragile, that there simply isn’t time to look around for a secular alternative.
There is some truth in this, though not much. It is true that people would have to be very quick off the mark in Kendal to avoid a religious funeral, since there are such good working relationships between funeral directors and clergy that clergy can be visiting the bereaved within hours of a death being notified. These days, though, almost everyone lives into advanced old age; we have many years in which to think about our obsequies, and to make our wishes known.
Also, in our consumerist society, I am sure that if the demand for secular funerals were there, a national alternative to the religious funeral would by now have emerged. So why does the religious funeral persist?
There is space to suggest two reasons. This is how I make sense of what people say — though interpretation is not always easy.
THE FIRST reason has to do with the contrast between a religious and a secular funeral. This became clear to me earlier this year when I was asked to officiate at the funeral of someone I had known for 30 years. I was surprised to be asked, because the friend was an atheist, and his partner wanted a secular funeral. Not without difficulty, though out of friendship, I agreed.
For a Christian priest, however, this was like trying to save someone from drowning with your arms and legs tied together. Much of what I would want to say, I could not say. Much of what I would want to do — such as pray and commend my friend to God — I had to refrain from doing.
The occasion consisted of favourite pieces of music and short eulogies by friends, all with an amusing story or two. (And it was all done well.) It was a “celebration” of a life. And that, of course, gives the clue. The secular funeral can look only in one direction — backwards, to a life now lived.
It is literally hopeless, for hope is about the future, and the one thing the non-believer knows is that there is no future beyond physical death; for without God there could be no future beyond physical death. Many people may not be convinced believers, but they want to keep the door of hope at least ajar. The secular funeral slams it shut.
This leads into a second reason why the religious funeral persists. The secular funeral essentially makes a utilitarian evaluation of the life lived, based on the contribution the deceased has made — as partner, parent, friend, citizen. This works for many funerals, but by no means all. Some of these are obvious: I think immediately of the funerals of a suicide; a severely mentally handicapped baby; a young man who destroyed his life and that of others in a drink-induced car crash; a young woman who gave her short life to drugs.
With other funerals, we pick our way with care: there may not be a whole skeleton in the cupboard, but we are made aware of a few bones. It then becomes hard or forced to find convincing reasons to be wholly celebratory.
But, in the church funeral, the evaluation of a life is religious, not utilitarian: whatever we have done in and with our lives, Christ died for us. This allows us to express a range of emotions: sorrow and sadness, guilt and regret, despair and anger, as well as thankfulness and pride. All can be accommodated. We don’t even have to labour any point, since the liturgy takes care of it. And, at the key moment, the rite is unambiguous: we commend the dead to God.
We do live in a time of no religion — a time when many people do not want regular contact with organised religion. This makes those moments when they do of considerable significance. We need to keep puzzling out why that is, so that we can minister more effectively. Why do people ask for a religious funeral? Because it allows us to say our farewells with integrity, and does not close the door on hope.
Canon Dr Alan Billings is the Vicar of St George’s, Kendal, and St John’s, Grayrigg, and the author of Secular Lives, Sacred Hearts: The role of the Church in a time of no religion (SPCK, 2004).
We want Christians funerals because we want to pray for the soul of the dead.
True true, people can be saved on their deathbed.
The Bible says when the books are opened, those whose names are not found in the Lamb's Book of Life will be cast into the lake of fire for eternal punishment. Makes me think it's worth my time to seek Him and make sure I know Him and am known by Him, now, during the course of my lifetime, rather than putting it off till the end of my life.
+* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +*
Without faith it is impossible to please God.
+* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +* +*
But, whew, waiting till my deathbed to call on Jesus is not a gamble I would want to take, as some are killed unexpectedly and instantly, so might not have time to say, "Save me, Jesus".
**And in the USA, I hear more and more of those who have NO funeral. None whatsoever. I guess the fam just tends to the remains in the manner of their choice. Tells the undertaker what cemetery the plot's in for burial. OR,
Runs by the funeral home and picks up the ashes, takes them home, sets them on a shelf somewhere.**
The most loving man in history said, "Let the dead bury their dead".
Yes, Jesus Christ said those words. That's some tough love.
"Why Secular people still want Christian Funerals"
Sorry, but it's too late.
I am curious about the christian's response to those questions.
The desire for God is written in the human heart, because man is created by God and for God; and God never ceases to draw man to himself. Only in God will he find the truth and happiness he never stops searching for:
But the crux is that most of these secular people are not Christians in the sense that they had not accepted Jesus Christ as their personal Saviour when they died. One you die there is no second chance. Why should we give them Christian funerals when they did not believe when they were in this world?
. . .
God is alive and well :)
Althought I think the Bible clear on God's sovereignty over the salvation of all men, I think we have to be careful of being overpresumptuous. There is no doubt in my mind that Hitler is in hell (Neale Donald Walsh notwithstanding) and that Bin Laden is well on his way if he's not there already. But I wonder sometimes how few Christians pray for men such as these, that God might make of them a display of His incomparable grace and mercy. Given what Saul of Tarsus did in relentless persecution of saints, and the mighty way that God used Him after, I always hold out hope that such examples of God's abundant grace will continue to shine forth on a grand scale in this day and age.
this is the weirdest thing I have ever heard of. Why on earth would a person want a Christian funeral when they spurned the entire idea while they were healthy and could do anything for God and the furtherance of His kingdone.This is the untimate in selfishness.
this is the weirdest thing I have ever heard of. Why on earth would a person want a Christian funeral when they spurned the entire idea while they were healthy and could do anything for God and the furtherance of His kingdone.This is the untimate in selfishness.
I am actually not really surprised at this. It certainly reveals even more about mankind and how much sin has affected him. It is not as if they do not know God at all, but instead "they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened." Just like so many in our culture today.....they want the benefits without the responsibilities.
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