I could never figure this out. My ex never had any capacity for logical thoughts or actions. Everything was based on emotion. I could never figure out how it is possible to do this and survive/function. It seems to disprove evolution.
I had to live with the ex for 6 months after our separation, because I am not paying rent and a mortgage at the same time, I am staying here until the stroke of midnight the day of transference. In the end she would, from time to time, burst out yelling at me screaming "Why don’t you look at me anymore". I would reply "because I aint getting any, Duhhhhhhh", that would really get her going.
At that point she would start throwing stuff at me, my daughter would call the police, and the cops would threaten to throw me in jail. All for not looking at her!
One night they were about ready to cuff me until I pointed out that I was the only one bleeding with bruises. I told them "this is my house, you don’t have a warrant, she is assaulting me, I can deal with that by myself, go away". They left, priceless.
Do you think they would arrest her? No way. And there is no way I would press charges, because I want absolutely NO dealings with the cops. I would rather be beaten than get involved in that way. By the way, I found out that vodka makes the beatings hurt less, but it also makes the head fakes to avoid the projectiles a little more challenging. Sometimes you just have to compromise.
Life is good!
Yeah! Mine is shacked up with a former friend of mine. I should be p!ssed, but it is the greatest favor anyone has done for me.
She still calls and gets nasty over little stuff and I say: "Hey! I'm not your husband anymore, you don't have to yell at me. I'm just some guy on the phone now."
Changes her behavior completely.
Apologize if making a generalization, but see it all the time. Also, if/when she gets violent, put your hands in your pocket and go into another room and shut/lock/barricade the door, or leave the home. Standard advice I give to avoid the phony assault charge and arrest.