FRANCE - Some Famous Quotes

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[Xthe17th]

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed by prostitutes." --Mark Twain

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." --General George S. Patton

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." --Norman Schwartzkopf

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." --Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure." --Jacques Chirac, President of France

"As far as France is concerned, you're right." --Rush Limbaugh

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee." --Regis Philbin

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I don't know." --P. J. O'Rourke

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it." --John McCain

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people." --Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!" --Jay Leno

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag." --David Letterman

[Pastor of Muppets]

I was given these in e-mail recently. I accept neither credit nor blame for originating them:

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Q: How do you stop a French tank?
A: By shooting the soldier pushing it.

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Q: Why does the new French Navy have glass-bottom boats?
A: So they can see the old French Navy....

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Q: How can you recognize a French veteran?
A: Sunburned armpits.

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Q: What is a Frenchman with a sheep and a goat under each arm?
A: Bisexual.

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Q: The French have just ordered a new national flag.
A: It's a white cross on a white background

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Q: Where do you find 60million French jokes?
A: In France.

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Q: How many gears in a French tank?
A: Six: five reverse and one forward, in case they are attacked from behind.

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Something to ponder:
You are the President of the United States. Scientists have
discovered a meteor that is headed towards the earth. They have calculated that it will strike France in 2 days, at approximately 2:30 A.M. The meteor is large enough to completely wipe France from the face of the earth forever. France and the United Nations have requested that the United States send all available ships and aircraft to help evacuate the country. Among the ships and planes you could be sending are many that are being used to fight the war on terror overseas.

As the President, you must decide. Do you :

A. Stay up late on the night of the impact to watch the coverage live?

or

B. Tape it and watch it in the morning?

[Paulus Invictus]

"Never was there a country where the practice of governing too much had taken deeper root and done more mischief." Tom Jefferson, and he knew from close experience. The French have not changed. Never will.

[SAMWolf]

From the Department of Homeland Security:
What to do if terror strikes and you are French



1. Get in a fetal position and begin crying. That is all.

[friendly]

How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb? One. He holds the bulb and all of Europe revolves around him.

"I just love the French. They taste like chicken!" ---- Hannibal Lecter

[harpseal]

I agree Italy's record in WWII was nothing spectacular and I am making no comment about the bravery of French soldiers merely presenting a couple of facts. The big problem the French had was a severe lack of insight by most of their Generals and politicians at the start of World War II. Many of the French Army who died in WWII died in prison camps after their forced surrender. I note that in the Franco Prussian War, and World War I the German army came from the northeast of France and still the heaviest fortifications were concentrated in the Maginot line.

As to WWI the Battle of the Marne was probably the finest hour of the French Army. The so called phony war was one of France's greatest mistakes. The Free French in 1944 and 1945 performed very honorably.

[JohnGalt]

That's the funny part really. I get called a Hitler worshipper for suggesting we should have left the French to the Nazi's and Stalin, and on this thread I'm made out to be a Francophile.

My only comment is that the French solidier is as brave and capable as the next, it was their leadership that was corrupt, uneducated, and incompetent; same with the Italian Army during WW2. The French are still a better friend who have contributed several great works to Western culture and they did keep out the Muslim Hordes.

France, like Germany, has been a battleground for so long, can you blame them for wanting peace? Where as Britian and the United States have had skirmishes on the edges of empire to no better avail I might add, save an ugly 'win' in the Philipines War over a hundred years ago. (Grenada, I believe is something to be quite proud of, on the otherhand, TY RR.)

[MadIvan]

Where as Britian and the United States have had skirmishes on the edges of empire to no better avail I might add, save an ugly 'win' in the Philipines War over a hundred years ago. (Grenada, I believe is something to be quite proud of, on the otherhand, TY RR.)

Excuse me: "skirmishes on the edge of empire"? What the bloody hell do you think the Blitz was all about? We got firebombed out of our homes here in London night after night. Paris, on the other hand, surrendered in plenty of time to prevent damage.

What's wrong with the French is very simple - ever since the end of the First World War, they have been vulnerable to a school of thought which says that surrender is preferable to war. This is not a school of thought which has, fortunately, caught on elsewhere with the exceptions of Berkeley and Hampstead. I recommend William Shirer's excellent book, "The Collapse of the Third Republic" for more information.

In any event, this pernicious school of thought informs French policy to this day, calculated, philosophical cowardice. It is contemptible. And it is contemptible to label it otherwise.

Ivan

[MadIvan]

France claims only one prominent soldier named Napoleon, but he hailed from Corsica, part of the Genovese "empire." His name was really Buonaparte. He ruled all of Europe at one time, killed hundreds of thousands of people, including French, and is commemorated by a large tomb in Paris that few people ever see. It is a dusty, ugly mausoleum with hole-in-the-floor-no-paper heads. Sorta reflects the French ideals of culture and civilization. Yuk!

Also his tomb lists "Moscow" as a victory. No.

Regards, Ivan

[JohnGalt]

I am certainly no Francophile, but I am sickened that such slanders to the character of the individual Frenchmen are tolerated on this website where the mere mention of Israel in the slightest negative light will have the anti-Semite branding iron burned into a thread.

There was a great revisionist (in the true sense not the deniers sense) book I read last year that argued German tactics had brought Germany to the brink of victory in 1917 only to have America enter the war and upset the balance of power. (American anglo-philes have no concept of continental politics.) The book continued that the German Army continued these tactics in 1939-1940 and secured their 'rightful' victory. Strange, that liberal historian Barbara Tuchman's 'Guns of August' carried the theme that 'if only' Germany had carried out the Schlieffen plan as originally conceived and conquered Paris in 1914, the war would have been quick and short. Well, the Wehmarcht did just that in May-June 1940 and corrected the balance of power. So internationalists need to make up their mind which story they wish to tell.

Hitler's terms were incredibly reasonable considering Britain still loomed a belligerent; he even allowed the Vichy government to fight Mussolini to a draw in the South, which gave returned incredible morale to the Southern French who viewed their Northern countrymen probably the same way the neo-cons talk about the whole of France.

[JohnGalt]

William Shirer is a far left journalist; perhaps your views are shaped by a propagandist rather than a historian?

I suggest you read a Conservative Thatcherite like Clive Ponting, but I would not expect you to read conservatives. I read Shirer's book; great drama, poor history.

Yes, French political culture is contemptible and frankly, I am not sure why the British teamed up with them twice, but to question the bravery of the individual French solider from a bunch of yahoos on a website post anonymously is beneath contempt.

[JohnGalt]

I suggest a quick study of the Junker's Prussia. Our country adopted most of our welfare state ideas, let alone modeled out army, after their country.

[MadIvan]

William Shirer is a far left journalist; perhaps your views are shaped by a propagandist rather than a historian?

So is Christopher Hitchens, who happens to be right from time to time. As such, Shirer happened to be right about how contemptible Nazi Germany was, and how contemptible the Third Republic was, which you confirm by saying:

Yes, French political culture is contemptible and frankly, I am not sure why the British teamed up with them twice...

Because who else were we going to team up with while America was isolationist, to counterbalance the Germans? We were not precisely spoiled for choice.

I do have Mr. Pontings work as well. But I am discussing the Third Republic and its contemptible culture, which despite your bluster, have not been able to deny. Nor have you been able to deny that France's present political machinations are informed by this philosophy.

Ivan

[Aeronaut]

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." --Norman Schwartzkopf

I believe Donald Rumsfeld said this.

It was reported on another thread that it originated with someone (I believe) in the Nixon cabinet.

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion; you get to leave a lot of annoying noise behind."

[RnMomof7]

BUMP

[JohnGalt]

Hitchens and Shirer are far-left journalists/propagandists. Its entertainment, but not history.

Germany defeated France, Poland, and England for that matter because of tactics-- supplies and Monty's conviction in North Africa-- plus some Australians who would not give an inch. The German general staff, had to earn their stripes through the Wehmarcht; Guderian and Rommel read books by Lidell Hart just as Lidell Hart read Rommel's infantry books. Where as in the case of the French, most army posts were political appointees or at least were politically connected-- same with Italy and Stalin's Red Army.

Abstract musings by lefties, notwithstanding, Britain sold their soul to keep Germany from dominating the continent and have not been the same sense. Was it worth it?

[MadIvan]

Germany defeated France, Poland, and England for that matter because of tactics-- supplies and Monty's conviction in North Africa-- plus some Australians who would not give an inch.

You first accuse me of being unaware of history and then suggest England surrendered? This after your suggestion that England wasn't on the "front line" of battle. Your historical awareness is dim to say the least. We did not surrender, nor could Britain not be said to be on the "front line". Should you suggest otherwise, I have a grandmother who lived through those times with a very heavy iron skillet who will pound some sense into your head.

Abstract musings by lefties, notwithstanding, Britain sold their soul to keep Germany from dominating the continent and have not been the same sense. Was it worth it?

We did not "sell our soul"; and I suppose you feel it would have been far better just to let Hitler have his way. In which case, you are contemptible scum as well as being delusional.

Ivan

[MadIvan]

Never mind, I just read your profile - apparently you're one of those LewRockwell.Com freaks. No wonder you make no sense whatsoever.

Ivan

[WOSG]

"Never was there a country where the practice of governing too much had taken deeper root and done more mischief." Tom Jefferson, and he knew from close experience. The French have not changed. Never will.
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Ah, an interesting quote. hadnt seen it before ... and VERY TRUE!!!

The Communist ideology owes a lot to France.

[WOSG]

Re: your WWII history ... what nonsense - there is no 'balance of power' to conquering dmeocratic nations and turning them into colonies of nazi Germany! Thanks God Churchill was there to fight Nazi Germany and save Europe from Fascist dictatorship. With US of course.

[P.O.E.]

Bogart: "I remember Paris perfectly. You wore blue, the Germans wore grey"