USO Canteen FReeper Style ~ Military Jokes ~ February 24 2003

68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub and FRiends of the Canteen

[comwatch]

 

Thank you all for the warm welcome... now we roll up the sleeves and pass the word.

Also, if you haven't signed the Support Our Commander in Chief petition, please do.

Support the Commander in Chief
Click Here to Send a Message the opposition hates!

Here's where we stand as of this hour: Support the Commander in Chief Petition Statistics
As of 2/24/03 4:37:19 PM CST
(updated every 10 minutes)

Petition Target Date:	3/31/03
Target Number of Petitioners:	250,000
Total Petitioners to Date:	178,763

Total petitioners TODAY:

1,429

# added in the last 72 hours:	7,327
Velocity (current petitioners per hour):	52

	107
	50

We hope to deliver 250,000+ to the White House by 3-31-03

[firewalk]

Thanks for the ping & the smile

[Radix]

Here is some transportation for the Dudes and all!

[Mudboy Slim]

Interesting, my FRiend...an architect buddy of mine is a volunteeer EMS up north of Richmond.

"...petite li'l Tommie's gonna be the Belle of the General Prison Population Ball...BWAHAHAHAHA!!!

So Sayeth the Word of...MUD

[Radix]

1786 Wilhelm Karl Grimm Hanau Germany, story teller (Grimm's Fairy Tales)

.

Here is one Fairy Tale That you might know of!

Here is an explanation of what rampion is.

The radixionary was confounded by the term!

[Kathy in Alaska]

"Inspirational Posters For The Cubicle Era"

These are hilarious, tom. Thanks! My favorite:

"Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

[Radix]

1990 Tony Conigliaro baseball player (Red Sox), dies in Salem MA at 45

Tony Conigliaro was a great ball player. He could have been one of the greatest hitters of all time.

[Kathy in Alaska]

Whatever time of day it is, hello Aeronaut and Otto! Thank you for the daily flyover of protection.

[Radix]

1917 Red Sox sell Smokey Joe Wood, his arm dead at 26, to Cleveland for $15,000

Sometimes (in my humble opinion) a story can do more than any post of a graphic ever could.

Smokey Joe Wood was one of the greatest pitchers that the Red Sox have ever had.

I went looking for conversion charts in order to show just what $15,000 dollars in 1917 would equate to in todays terms.

I found myself caught up in learning some fascinating things about Economies and Inflation.I actually forgot (for a brief moment) why I was looking into this stuff in the first place.

It struck me as a bit funny, thus I share it here. I love to laugh!

[Aeronaut]

Hey Kathy, how's it going "up there"?

[alfa6]

Here is one from my daughter who is away at college, she has quite a collection of military jokes, I will have to have her send me the Skippy list as well.

Regards

alfa6 ;>}


US Army Voice Mail


Thank you for calling the United States Army. I'm sorry, but all of our units
are out at the moment, or are otherwise engaged. Please leave a message with
your country, name of organization, the region, the specific crisis, and a
number at which we can call you. As soon as we have sorted Out the Balkans,
Iraq, Korea, China, the Y2K Bug, marching up and down the streets of
Washington, D.C., and compulsory Consideration Of Others training, we will
return your call.

Please speak after the tone, or if you require more options, please listen to
the following numbers:

If your crisis is small, or close to the sea, and needs to be totally
obliterated, press 1 for the United States Marine Corps.

If your concern is distant, with a temperate climate and good hotels, and can
be solved by one or two low risk, high altitude bombing runs, please press 2
for the United States Air Force. Please note this service is not available
after 1630 hours, or on weekends. Special consideration will be given to
customers requiring satellite or stealth technology who can provide additional
research and development funding.

If your enquiry concerns a situation which can be resolved by a bit of grey
funnel, bunting, flags and a really good marching band, please write, well in
advance, to the United States Navy. Please note that Tomahawk missle service
is extremely limited and will be provided on a first-come, first-served basis.

If your enquiry is not urgent, please press 3 for the Rapid Deployment Force.

If you are in real hot trouble, please press 4, and your call will be routed
to the United States Army Special Operations Command. Please note that a
compulsory credit check will be required to ensure you can afford the inherent
TDY costs. Also be aware that USASOC may bill your account at any time and is
not required to tell you why, as it will be classified.

If you are interested in joining the Army and wish to be shouted at, paid
little, have premature arthritis, put your wife and family in a condemned hut
miles from civilization, and are prepared to work your *** off daily, risking
your life, in all weathers and terrains, both day and night, whilst watching
Congress erode your original benefits package, then please stay on the line.
Your call will shortly be connected to a bitter passed-over Army Recruiter in
an old strip mall down by the Post Office.

Have a pleasant day, and thank you again for trying to contact the United
States Army.

[tomkow6]

A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to
his friend, "I'm a walking economy." His friend replies,
"How's that?"

"It's like this -- my hair line is in recession, my stomach is
a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is
putting me into a deep depression."

[LaDivaLoca]

Good evening to my fellow Canteeners, our Troops, Vets, Allies, Volunteers and your families.

[LaDivaLoca]

Thank you to the men in the Military and the Canteen for the beautiful red roses!

[SAMWolf]

Current Military News
The Few, The Proud

Father Bill Devine, right, of Boston, blesses Cpl. Nick Scyoc of McMinnville, Ore., during a Catholic Mass for the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Father Bill Devine of Boston performs a Catholic Mass for the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


A U.S. Marine kneels after receiving communion during a Catholic Mass for the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Marines with the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force pray during a Catholic Mass at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Chaplain David Slater baptizes Lance Cpl. Adam Hand of New Bader, Ill., during a Protestant service at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Marines with the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force participate in a game of football at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Marine Cpl. Ricky, Perry of Elko, Nev., right front, gets a hair cut from Gunnery Sgt. Dennis Stieber of Marathon, Wis., at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2003. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)


Marines with the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force salute during the playing of the U.S. national anthem at Life Support Area 7 in the Kuwaiti desert south of Iraq on Sunday, Feb. 23, 2002. (AP Photo/Laura Rauch)

[MoJo2001]

That is so beautiful, Diva! Thank you so much!! I've got a closet dedicated to all Bentfeather Words of Wonder! Woohoo!! *HUGS*

[LaDivaLoca]

I read that thread at work today and I was so steamed! This is unacceptable, the ingrates!

[MoJo2001]

Welcome To The Canteen, comwatch!! Ma must really like ya because she gave you the MILITARY TEDDY SALUTE BRIGADE! Come on in and have some fun!

[MoJo2001]

Thank you, Valin for posting the wonderful history for us today. I know you sent me the link, but just the fact that you do it for all of us is something very special. Thank you!

[LaDivaLoca]

LOL! There are exceptionally great jokes today! Thanks for the laugh everyone.