Olsen Twins Arrested at Anti-War Demonstration (PARODY)

www.BSNN.net ^ | Vanity Dregs

[goliath]

Olsen Twins Arrested at Anti-War Demonstration

By Vanity Dregs
BSNN.net Headline News

Dressed in the latest design from the Olsen Twins' G.I. Jane Collection, Ashley Olsen is dragged to jail after she jumped the fence surrounding the White House. President and Mrs. Bush were unhurt.

WASHINGTON — Declaring they are convinced Saddam Hussein isn’t such a bad guy and therefore "there is no need for war," Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (the Olsen Twins) led a spontaneous anti-war demonstration that ended in their arrest outside the White House. Both Mary-Kate and Ashley are demanding that President Bush use diplomacy to end the crisis with Iraq .  

"All this talk of war is freaking us out," Mary-Kate told BSNN.net, "and after watching a rerun of China Beach , Ashley and I are convinced there is a better way."

Being entertainers, the Olsen Twins are longtime political activists whose first protest—shortly after their birth in 1986—was against the Reagan Administration’s support of the Nicaraguan Contras. Predictably, the twins also opposed the use of force to remove Manuel Noriega and won widespread respect in Hollywood when they protested the Gulf War by refusing to eat pizza until it was over.

Mary-Kate Olsen is gagged and arrested in Lafayette Square during a spontaneous anti-war rally near the White House. 

The twins seem unconcerned about a public backlash against their strong political stand and hope that their status as superstars can help sway some people to the anti-war camp.

"President Bush has declared 'either with us or against us,'" sneered Ashley, "and Mary-Kate and I refuse to allow that doo-doo brain to speak for us. He ain’t exactly Josiah Bartlett, ya know."

Insisting that they are patriotic Americans and agreeing in principle that Saddam Hussein should not be allowed to have weapons of mass destruction, the twins argue that just because President Bush and Saddam Hussein are angry at each other, that’s no reason to become violent.

To further their goal of altering the course of history, the twins have released a new song and music video, "Give Appeasement a Chance," which they hope President Bush and Saddam Hussein will use as anger management.

 "If I’m angry or in a bad mood, I put on really loud music and dance around my room until I feel better," explained Ashley. "And that’s what we are urging President Bush and Saddam Hussein to do, too."

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[ewing]

LOL! Only a few more years and they will be legal and able to be thrown in the county lockup..

[Ken522]

Will I get banned if I say the twins are a waste of their mother's egg?

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[gridlock]

What does the Mary Kate and Ashley Olson Countdown Clock have to say about that?

Sorry. Straying into Scott Ritter country, there.

[theFIRMbss]

>"Dressed in the latest design from the Olsen Twins' G.I. Jane Collection..."

All of existence
is just one long commercial
opportunity!

[SarahW]

That's "eggs" to you, bud. They are fraternal twins.
And also the article is a joke. But you knew that.

[American Blood]

"All this talk of war is freaking us out," Mary-Kate told BSNN.net, "and after watching a rerun of China Beach , Ashley and I are convinced there is a better way."

Sounds like the twins put a lot of thought into their decision. If the dems ever win back control of the White House, these two idiots would make fine National Security Advisors for the rats.

[csvset]

Lol, many will think this is true.

I saw a tv news blurb about tv teens net worth, they estimated the Olson twins fortune @ 75 million. Not bad.

[YaYa123]

The Ashley Twins = Scott Ritter Dream Team

[dighton]

"After two hours in the lockup, they were bailed out by friend and fellow activist Scott Ritter."

[goliath]

Not bad, indeed.

[woofie]

"President Bush has declared 'either with us or against us,'" sneered Ashley, "and Mary-Kate and I refuse to allow that doo-doo brain to speak for us. He ain’t exactly Josiah Bartlett, ya know."

[SMEDLEYBUTLER]

p-a-r-o-d-y

[E Rocc]

Okay, what's the over-under on the number of responses who think this is legit? >:)

-Eric

[cactusSharp]

a little off...their real worth is 300 million AFTER TAXES
and they are God Fearing girls and mannered to beat the drum...secret as Johnny Carson and reverent
dem's da facts

[RepublicanHippy]

I am sorry but I never heard of the Olsen twins! Who are they? What TV show or movie have they been in?

[drjoe]

"Will I get banned if I say the twins are a waste of their mother's egg? "

No you won't but they are a waste of their mothers' EGGS. They are not identical twins

drjoe

[PBRSTREETGANG]

The article is satire. Go easy on the twins.

[SauronOfMordor]

BTW, the article is a HUMOR PARODY, for those who don't get it.