USO Canteen FReeper Style ~ Military Valentines Day Project Thread 2 ~ January 22 2003

68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub and FRiends of the Canteen

[southerngrit]

Ooh, Diva!! Can I "borrow" that graphic?

Too funny!

[PhilDragoo]

Godspeed Swift Victory and Safe Return to the Finest Fighting Force on Earth

God Bless Our Troops, Our Veterans, and Their Families

SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING TO SADDAM HUSSEIN:

Disarming is easier before you become a bag of body parts labelled "Some Assembly Required".

[LaDivaLoca]

THE RULES

Must be the Theraflu. What do they put in that thing?! LOL!

[Ragtime Cowgirl]

Thank you for the poem, LaDiva...Edgar Guest writes with joy and simplicity...he was a national treasure, imho.

I scrolled through the whole Canteen thread and figured you all must have been pretty busy today to miss this thread:

Dear American soldier , Michelle Malkin's excellent thank you letter to our troops.

Michelle Malkin

Dear American soldier

http://www.NewsAndOpinion.com |
Dear American soldier,  

You don't know me, but I know who you are and I will not forget.

You are deploying from Fort Carson and Fort Hood and Fort Bliss and Fort Stewart. You hail from Middletown and Middleboro and Greenville and Redding and Thousand Oaks and Maple Tree. You are white, black, brown, and yellow-but always Americans first.

You are with the 3rd Brigade Combat Team and the 10th Combat Support Hospital and the 571st Air Ambulance Medical Evacuation Company. You are with the 1st Cavalry Division and the 3rd Infantry Division and the "Iron Horse" 4th Infantry Division. You are Black Knights with the 2nd Battalion, 5th Cavalry Regiment. You are engineers, drivers and medics in the 13th Corps Support Command.

Your motto is "We Will," "Steadfast and Loyal," "Swift and Deadly," "Always Prepared," "First to Fight," and "No Task Too Tough."

You will be joined overseas by thousands of sailors and Marines on the USS Boxer and USS Bonhomme Richard and USS Cleveland and USS Dubuque and USS Anchorage and USS Comstock and USS Pearl Harbor. You will get support in the Gulf from an airborne infantry brigade, a squadron of F-117 Nighthawk stealth fighters, and two squadrons of F-16CJ radar-jamming fighters.

You have friends on the USS Constellation in the Persian Gulf, and the USS Harry S Truman in the Mediterranean Sea, and the carrier USS Abraham Lincoln stationed at Perth, Australia, and the USNS Yano en route to the Red Sea, and the aircraft carrier USS Carl Vinson on its way to a training mission in the Pacific.

You have classmates and colleagues and cousins who died at the Pentagon and in the Twin Towers on September 11. You have buddies who took bullets over the past year in Afghanistan and Kuwait and the Philippines during Operation Enduring Freedom. You have uncles and brothers and fathers and grandfathers who sacrificed their lives in past wars.

Their deaths haunt you. Their heroism inspires you. Their footsteps beckon and you cannot resist.

You have wives who are tough as nails and husbands who are enormously proud. You have toddlers who know the colors of the American flag and grade-schoolers who have memorized Army verses like these:

The hardest job, the dirtiest job
Since ever war began
Is picking 'em up and laying 'em down
The job of an infantryman

No mission too difficult
No sacrifice too great
Our duty to the nation
Is the first we're here to state

Our doughboys come from Brooklyn
Our gunners from Vermont
Our signals from Fort Monmouth
Our engineers DuPont

Against the foes of freedom
We fight for liberty
We make no peace with tyrants
On land or on the sea

As you pack your green Army duffel bags, press your desert camouflage fatigues, polish your boots and kiss your families goodbye, please take these words with you:

Thank you. Thank you for answering the call to arms. Thank you for being fit and young and brave and willing. Thank you for loving freedom enough to put your own life on the line to defend it.

Pay no attention to Sean Penn and Sheryl Crow and Baghdad Babs. Tune out the half-naked loonies and Flower Power leftovers. Stand tall. Fight hard. And know that there are legions of Americans who are boundlessly grateful for what you have volunteered to do.

We know who you are. We will not forget. And we will pray every day for your safe return. Hoo-ah!

(The Department of Defense's online thank you note to the men and women of the U.S. military can be signed at http://www.defendamerica.mil/nmam.html.) 

Hoo-ah!

[LaDivaLoca]

Of course, you may! LOL! Enjoy it.

[LaDivaLoca]

Thanks for sharing that piece from MM! My sentiments exactly only she expresses it a lot better than I ever could!

[Kathy in Alaska]

Samoas it is! I have an order sheet in my hand as we speak. Any of your buddies with requests, you have until 1/30/03. Delivery to my desk, 3/14/03, and then on to the USS Tarawa. Any other specific requests, let us know. I would prefer smiles when opening Care Packages, instead of the "Oh how nice", that we did as kids when we got sox for Christmas or birthdays. LOL!

[southerngrit]

Wow!!

What I wouldn't give to be able to write like that!!

Thanks for sharing Michelle Malkin's letter with the Canteeners. I would have missed it, for sure, if left to my own devices.

[southerngrit]

TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND

10. Cats' facial expressions.

9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.

8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.

7. Fat clothes.

6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.

5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream,off-white and eggshell.

4. Cutting your bangs to make them grow.

3. Eyelash curlers.

2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND, the NUMBER ONE thing only women understand:

1. Other women.

[Dubya]

Everyday Cheapskate

I kissed my long-distance service goodbye

It could have been the dinnertime phone calls begging us to switch or the junk mail with 10-10-XXXX stickers to stick on our phones. Or the confusion and constant concern that we didn't have the best deal on a long-distance telephone calling plan.

It might have been any one of those things that finally pushed me over the edge. But it was, in fact, the monthly bill.

I thought we had a decent long-distance plan. But on closer look and factoring in all the additional fees (national access fee, federal universal service fee, current taxes and surcharges, federal excise tax, federal, state and local surcharges to name just a few), the effective rate of what AT&T promised was their best plan zoomed to more than 30 cents a minute. That's it, I said. I've had it!

I picked up the phone and kissed my long-distance service company goodbye! I told the customer-service person to cancel my long-distance service. Yes, I said, cancel it. I jumped in the car, drove to Sam's Club and bought two prepaid calling cards right off the rack. These cards are co-branded by AT&T and Sam's Club -- both familiar names that I could count on. I parked one card in a convenient place right by the telephone and the other in my wallet.

I like paying cash for our long-distance calls. especially when it's only 3.47 cents a minute, 24 hours a day to any spot in the United States, Canada or the Caribbean. No hidden fees, no monthly long-distance bill to deal with, no minimums or additional taxes. No surprises. It's working out beautifully. And the best part is a new awareness. Because I have to call the 800 number printed on the card (you don't need long-distance service to call toll-free numbers from your residential phone), I pay more attention to where I'm calling and I'm more aware of how long I'm talking.

Yes, it is an extra step to get the card out and go through the steps (takes about 30 seconds), but I got used to it after the second call. To me, it's the difference between paying cash and using credit. I pay more attention to what I'm doing and that's good.

There are two types of prepaid phone cards: disposable and those that can be "recharged" and billed to a credit card. My advice is to stay away from "rechargeables," and to consider only cards with major carriers like AT&T, MCI or Sprint. Avoid prepaid cards that tell you nothing about minutes, but state a number of "units" (which might not be equal to minutes), and those that expire.

Yes, I'm a huge fan of prepaid long-distance phone cards -- a $480-a-year fan! That's how much I figure I'm not spending in a year's time when I use AT&T long distance for $.0347 cents not $.30 a minute. Other long-distance alternatives with similar savings can be found at www.onesuite.com and www.bigzoo.com.

Denominations and full prices of prepaid phone cards from Sam Club's vary, but currently a 600-minute card is $20.82. That's 10 hours of talk to any number in any state, Canada or the Caribbean, any time day or night, for 3.47 cents a minute. And there are no fees and no surprises.

[Kathy in Alaska]

Transportation for the Dudes!! I love it!

And where are the training wheels and the protective helmet? Oh wait! We don't have to be PC, do we? LOL!

[Radix]

Female brain

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their
family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired
and somber."I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed
the worried faces. "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is
a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is
the only hope. You will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great
length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?"
The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a
female brain." The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to
smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone
wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?" The doctor smiled
at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just
standard procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains,
because they've actually been used."

[Kathy in Alaska]

"Learn Chinese in 5 minutes"

LOL!! After reading out loud.

[LaDivaLoca]

and to all who are experiencing the krud

[snippy_about_it]

See post 164.

Dear American soldier, Michelle Malkin's excellent thank you letter to our troops!

[southerngrit]

Hah!!

Hope you have a walk-in closet - you might have to convert the silly thing to a fallout shelter...

Here's a little something from my e-mail in box:

English Assignment

Students at Harvard English 101 class were asked to write a CONCISE essay containing four elements: religion, royalty, sex and mystery.

The only "A+" in the class read:

"My God, said the Queen, "I'm pregnant! I wonder who did it?"

[Kathy in Alaska]

[Radix]

SEPERATED AT BIRTH?

[Dubya]

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on

their faces.

The coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened.

"First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure whilst making love

to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector", says the Coroner.

"Second body: "Scotsman, 25, won a thousand pounds on the lottery,
spent it all on whisky. Died of alcohol poisoning, hence the smile."

The Inspector asked, "What of the third body?"

"Ah," says the coroner, "this is the most unusual one. Billy-Bob the

redneck from Alabama, 30, struck by lightning."

"Why is he smiling then?" inquires the Inspector.

"Thought he was having his picture taken."

[Kathy in Alaska]

Good evening from Alaska, Beth!