Another Man Down in the War Against Fathers

FatherMag.com ^ | August 22, 2002 | Roger F. Gay

[doubletrouble1994]

I'd like to know what the hell all you men are smokin'? You feel like it should be poor me, I did nothing and she is taking everything from me. The way I see it GET A LIFE and get over it!!!

[doubletrouble1994]

If you would open your eyes you would see it is happening everywhere.

[balrog666]

I'd like to know what the hell all you men are smokin'? You feel like it should be poor me, I did nothing and she is taking everything from me. The way I see it GET A LIFE and get over it!!!

I have no idea what you are ranting on about. If you have a point, make it.

[amused]

I've heard some bad stories about absentee fathers.

Many of the general news media stories are wrong. People have been lying a lot about fathers for more than a decade. It's for the money. Money states get from the federal government and the money collection agencies get from forcing fathers into debt and then "collecting."

Unfortunately I was not talking about the news media and more about the experiences of friends and acquaintances.

The resentment at the father who moved away and started a new life, ...

Yes, I can understand that. But most divorces are filed by mothers. Mothers most often get custody.

Granted I am dealing with a smaller sample size but again I was relating the experiences as told by friends and acquaintances.

the anger at the father who wasn't around for years at a time, the awkwardness of the birthday card as the only means of communication with ones father, etc.

It's understandable. Divorce isn't the greatest thing on earth. The feminists are wrong about that.

It certainly isn't and they certainly are.

[RogerFGay]

Women must stop assuming that fathers are sperm providers whose children don't need them

[RogerFGay]

In post #719, unless you're living in the middle east and talking about their history, you simply repeated feminist propaganda. If you're talking about men owning people in the US, at one time some men and women owned other men, women, and children, but that has nothing to do with divorce and family.

[shaggy eel]

The way I see it GET A LIFE and get over it!!!

,,, that's the standard line given by all winners who generally identify well with grief and loss in any other context apart from this topic. Trouble is, getting over it (or as your type would call it "healing") isn't quite as easy when faced with great financial inequity, engineered by a system so well disposed to your ilk.

[shaggy eel]

If you would open your eyes you would see it is happening everywhere.

,,, no argument at all with that, my point was it isn't men getting stressed, it's womyn doing the sums on welfare projections and kicking them out. I know a number of guys who've fallen into that. I know nobody at all who's walked out because of stress.

[almostheaven aka MrsDrumbo]

Of course you don't want me to bother you Rog. How quickly you forget disavowing ever typing those words: "No, the words you used where your own.". Now you say "That's what I said and it hasn't changed." Coming from you, I really expected no less.

[almostheaven aka MrsDrumbo]

,,, that's the standard line given by all winners (sic) who generally identify well with grief and loss in any other context apart from this topic. Trouble is, getting over it (or as your type would call it "healing") isn't quite as easy when faced with great financial inequity, engineered by a system so well disposed to your ilk.

That's funny. This is the most used line by father's rights activitist, next to "money grubbing bitch".

[almostheaven aka MrsDrumbo]

Very well said, and the reason for the disagreement with Roger's diatribe in the first place. Pick a better father as an example...it's straightforward, simple, and makes sense...to most ppl anyway.

[shaggy eel]

,,, I've never used the term "money grubbing bitch" as my two children are responsibilities I'm glad to say I honour, both financially and with as much time as I'm allowed to give them. However, the stripping of assets that I've paid for with hard earned tax paid dollars under the guise of what's "best for the children" is a sore point. I have no need to live in the $330,000 house she got, but taking on debt to house myself in more modest accomodation because my ex prefers to live with my father is something the governement shouldn't endorse, much less financially assist her with.

[Right To Life]

"Right To Life": The presumption that custody must be a winner/ loser, parent/visitor situation is the root of all the family court problems, and by extension the cause of many of America's problems of social degeneration over the last 3-4 decades.

"Right2Parent": On the contrary, it was such a presumption that held families together until courts felt a need to "modify" natural law. It was long held that a father's natural right to guardianship was only overcome by proof that the child's welfare would by jepardized by leaving him in the father's care after a divorce. The burden of proof was on the accuser. That doesn't mean the mother wouldn't have a case for visitation, or that a father wouldn't be expected to allow the child to maintain that relationship, but what it does mean is there is a presumption he will make those decisions in the best interest of the child. Compare the curve on divorce rates since an activist court began unlawfully interfering with this natural relationship, if you have "eyes to see."

Before you start imagining all the drunken, woman beating thugs taking custody from deserving mothers, I would point out that it would be the one who chose to desert the family without cause, or the drunken, woman beating thug that would loose custody. Those are both pretty clear indications of fitness.

Anyone this goes to have an opinion on this prescription which they would like to post? I'd be interested to read them, if you wanted to reply to this and add right2parent in the address line as well.

[Right To Life]

Pick a better father as an example...it's straightforward, simple, and makes sense...to most ppl anyway.

Roger that.

[Right To Life]

Life is family. Would you have a race of men who accepted, uncaringly, having their families taken from them by the State? Do you know how anarchy-oriented such men would inevitably be?

[Jerry_M]

Oh, I read it alright. Are you certain that it is not you who is reading it with blinders on?

[Red Jones]

You raise good points in #76; I believe that when a divorce occurs neither of the two parents should both have the children taken from them against their will and have child support payments taken from them against their will. In one marriage in three in the US now the wife kicks the husband out of the house and takes his money both with the power of the police backing her up. This is what Roger Gay is referring to as unconstitutional, people are being made slaves. If we followed this one simple rule of not taking both the children and the money away from one partner, then we'd have a lot less divorces. Marriages are becoming too much of a risk for many men. That's what Roger Gay and others are upset over.

[Right To Life]

Right on!

[almostheaven aka MrsDrumbo]

I've never used the term "money grubbing bitch"

Perhaps you haven't. However, if, as you stated, "Get over it" is the standard line given by all winners? (I assumed you meant whiners...or is it winners in court you refer to?), then it would appear those who use it often were the winners/whiners? AKA all those FR advocates who toss it around freely would fall into that category.

[almostheaven aka MrsDrumbo]

Roger that.

Well yeah, but I don't think Roger gets it. LOL