University Gets $5 Million For Beer Lab

DAVIS, Calif. -- Beer is coming to the University of California at Davis in a big way.

The Anheuser-Busch Foundation is donating $5 million to the university to help build a new brewing lab. The gift will allow UC Davis to double the number of students in the undergraduate and graduate brewing programs.

The school even has an Anheuser-Busch endowed professor of malting and brewing sciences.

But there's one catch to majoring in brewskis. If you aren't of legal age, you can't sample the final exam.

On a related note... World record burp attempt runs out of gas

LONDON (Reuters) - The world's loudest burper has failed to smash his own ear-splitting record after a sore throat forced him to throw in the towel after three attempts.
Solicitor's clerk Paul Hunn, 33, from London was hoping to better the 118.1 decibel mark -- a burp as loud as a pneumatic drill -- a sonic tour de force he set in 2000.
But after chugging back a carbonated drink and gulping mouthfuls of air to build up gas in his stomach, he could only manage 110.5 decibels on a Guinness World Record sound level meter.
"Sadly, he didn't break the record and had to stop after a few tries because his throat was getting too sore," said a spokeswoman at London's Science Museum, where Hunn was attempting his record burp.
"But when he heals up he's determined to set a new record," she added.
The world-record attempt was part of the museum's current "Grossology" exhibition, a look at the good, bad and ugly ways the human body works.
Hunn said his training routine includes plenty of spicy food and exercises to force air into his stomach.



You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It
helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons,
but at the very least you need a beer.
	-- Frank Zappa, musician/composer

Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. 
That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.
	-- Ernest Hemingway, author

I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.
	-- Winston Churchill, statesman

He was a wise man who invented beer.
	-- Plato, philosopher

Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time.
	-- Catherine Zandonella, writer

A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
	-- W.C. Fields, actor

Work is the curse of the drinking class. 
	-- Oscar Wilde, author

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
	-- Henny Youngman, comedian

Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
	-- Benjamin Franklin, statesman/inventor

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is
beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the
wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.
	-- Dave Barry, writer

The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
	-- Humphrey Bogart, actor

Why is American beer served cold?  So you can tell it from urine.
	-- David Moulton

People who drink light "beer" don't like the taste of beer; they just like
to pee a lot.
	-- Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
	-- Kaiser Wilhelm, emperor

I would kill everyone in this room for a drop of sweet beer.
	-- Homer Simpson, cartoon character

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen,
for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in
beer.
	-- Dave Barry, writer

All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me, so 
let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.
	-- Homer Simpson, cartoon character

Always store beer in a dark place.
	-- Robert Heinlein, author

Good people drink good beer.
	-- Dr. Hunter S. Thompson, journalist/author

Drunk: Have you ever had an out-of-body experience?
Willy: No, but I've had several out-of-beer experiences that were
       just about as bone-chilling as you can get.
	-- Willy 'n Ethel, cartoon characters

Here we have grain, from which any idiot can make bread, but for which
God intended a higher purpose. Gentlemen, let us discuss beer.
	-- Friar Tuck (paraphrased), movie character

This is all thousands of years old. It's the same the world over.  Anyone
who has ever walked upright has loved beer, celebrated over it, told talks
over it, hatched plots over it, courted over it.  It's what we do as a
species. It's what makes us human. We brew.
	-- Alan Eames (paraphrased), the Beer King

Ethel: You know how animals can sense fear?  Willy can sense beer.
	-- Willy 'n Ethel, cartoon characters

I would give all my fame for a pot of ale and safety.
	-- William Shakespeare, playwright

Back and side go bare, go bare,
both foot and hand go cold;
but, belly, God send thee good ale enough,
whether it be new or old.
	-- Bishop John Still

I drink when I have occasion, and sometimes when I have no occasion.
	-- Miguel de Cervantes, author

The problem with some people is that 
when they aren't drunk, they're sober.
	-- William Butler Yeats, poet

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.
	-- Henry Lawson, poet

For a quart of ale is a dish for a King.
	-- William Shakespeare, playwright

Whiskey's to tough,
Champagne costs too much,
Vodka puts my mouth in gear.
I hope this refrain 
Will help me explain,
As a matter of fact,
I like beer.
	-- Tom T. Hall, singer/songwriter

If God had intended us to drink beer, he would have given us stomachs.
	-- David Daye

I feel sorry for people who don't drink, because when they wake up 
in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
	-- Frank Sinatra, singer/actor

A little bit of beer is divine medicine.
	-- Paracelsus, Greek physician

I'm Catholic and I can't commit suicide, 
but I plan to drink myself to death.
	-- Jack Kerouac, author

Filled with mingled cream and amber 
I will drain that glass again. 
Such hilarious visions clamber 
Through the chambers of my brain --
Quaintest thoughts -- queerest fancies 
Come to life and fade away; 
Who cares how time advances? 
I am drinking ale today. 
	-- Edgar Allan Poe, poet

Most people hate the taste of beer -- to begin with.
It is, however, a prejudice.
	-- Winston Churchill, statesman

It was as natural as eating and to me as necessary, and I would not have
thought of eating a meal without drinking beer.
	-- Ernest Hemingway, author

A drink a day keeps the shrink away.
	-- Edward Abbey, author

When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year.
I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with
slightly over half that quantity of beer.
	-- Dave Barry, writer

All the other nations are drinking Ray Charles beer, and we are drinking
Barry Manilow beer.
	-- Dave Barry, writer

Beer, if drank with moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit,
and promotes health.
	-- Thomas Jefferson, President

You don't like jail?
Naw, they got the wrong kind of bars in there.
	-- Charles Bukowski, poet

Do not cease to drink beer, to eat, to intoxicate 
thyself, to make love, and celebrate the good days.
	-- Ancient Egytian proverb

Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer.
	-- Frederick the Great, Prussian ruler

I recommend bread, meat, vegetables, and beer.
	-- Sophocles, Greek playwright

I work until beer o'clock.
	-- Stephen King, author

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
	-- W.C. Fields, actor

... For we could not now take time for further search or
consideration: our victuals being much spent, especially
our beere. 
	-- Mayflower logbook entry, 1620

The selling of bad beer is a crime against Christian love. 
	-- 13th century German law

The mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with beer. 
	-- Ancient Egyptian proverb

Beer thoughts.

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